Would you guys marry a single mother ?

[Angelina]

That is an often used proverb but it has an older History.

Your sense of female injustice and warped idealism is delusionary young lady. It is what it is, nothing dire about this Dunya, it is a Test after all. Just be thankful your test ain't as bad as others.

Lol, it really isn't delusional. We live in man's world in which women are often tested more so than men and mistreated. Lets not normalise that shit, becauase if the shoe was on the other foot, you wouldn't. Your gender cry about the injustices of the courts when we have young women being raped back home and men are getting away with it whilst her life is ruined becaue society has deemed her used goods.

Also, by the way saying shit is 'dire' had nothing to do with gender equality I was merely talking about the state of high divorces amongst the young in general.

All in all, nothing is delusional about what i'm saying, because you know it's true but women pointing it out makes you uncomfortable, which unfortunately makes you also part of the problem.

 

[Angelina]

he never recommended us to marry divorced women he recommended we marry virgins

But nowhere does it say that marrying divorced/widowed women isn't a good deed especially since you're feeding and putting a roof over the head of child out of the goodness of your heart.

Anyways, there is clearly khair in everything the Prophet did. And he did marry widowed/divorced women so are anyone to say any negative thing about it?

 

[Amk]

Please explain to me why are we getting an extra reward by marrying a divorced or widowed if that is not recommendation?

You need to stop beating the bushes. The claim some guys made was that they won't marry a woman with a kid. I challenged that and part of my reasoning was the recommendation that was given to us through the actions of the Prophet (scw). You asked for a proof, and I provided a whole lecture. So again explain to me, why would a man receive extra reward for marrying a divorced or widowed if that is not recommendation? The Prophet (scw) wanted us to marry the virgin, divorced, and widowed. That is because Islam is just and fair all groups.

The idea that you want to run one hadith in isolation is dangerous. You want to understand the whole context. Prophet (scw) recommended to us marrying virgin, widowed, and divorcee. Which one you choose is your prerogative.

A man gets more reward from marrying a virgin due to the fact the the prophet ﷺ recommended it, u get reward for marrying a widow, but that does not mean u get more reward than marrying a virgin

 

[Angelina]

A man gets more reward from marrying a virgin due to the fact the the prophet ﷺ recommended it, u get reward for marrying a widow, but that does not mean u get more reward than marrying a virgin

Didn't he ask Jabir as he was a young man who never married? And once Jabir explained his reasoning the Prophet understood and praised his reasonings?

 

[Amk]

But nowhere does it say that marrying divorced/widowed women isn't a good deed especially since you're feeding and putting a roof over the head of child out of the goodness of your heart.

Ppl should marry who they want. If u situation deems a virgin more preferable then u should marry a virgin. nowhere did i say a marrying a widow or divorcee was bad

 

[Man with a garuun]

I sussed it out even before you admitted to it adeer lol. There you go again with the "real man" talk. Face it, the time, effort and resources required to raise "your wife's son" fucking lmfao, could be better spent raising your own biological child. No need to get defensive abti, I don't personally care if you marry half the female population in Bosaso, but please just stop coping. Besides, we didn't have that second wife/half-siblings, Jamaican tier shite in my household growing up. It's one man one wife.

Stop dissing the Muslim women, especially Somali girls, who married Jamaican Muslim men and perhaps divorced them. They were born and raised in UK, and if you Mali niggas in UK couldn't step up to the plate, then don't blame the ladies. Muslim Somali men should've been fulfilling their responsibilities over there. But all you niggas do is online and take issues with them.

Fyi, my prospective 2nd wife is in SL or North West Somalia (whichever way you understand it).

Raising another able-bodied man's child is peak cuckholdery, no ifs no buts

You keep saying "Raising another able-bodied man's child is peak cuckholdery, no ifs no buts", but British taxpayers raised you with their hard-earned money, so stop putting up some brave face. You niggas in UK are in all council homes, raised on the fruits of the other men's sweats, then you're expressing some boolshit over another Muslim's man's decision to marry a divorced Muslim woman with a kid. That is some serious fucked up shit.

 

[Amk]

Didn't he ask Jabir as he was a young man who never married? And once Jabir explained his reasoning the Prophet understood and praised his reasonings?

yes because he explained he had a situation which meant that marying a previously married women was preferable for him. The general rule would be virgins are more preferable unless u have na extreme situation which is indicated by this hadith

 

[Sheikh Kulkuli]

If you would marry a single how old the would the kid be max and what age should you be less picky ?

Dont dare unless she is rich.

 

[Wervelwind]

You're a straight cuck if you marry a single mom while the biological father is relaxing with his girlfriend somwhere else

 

[Qeelbax]

I personally would go nowhere near a single dad.
Kyahhhhhhhh, the thought of raising another womans child makes me a bit jealous.
But I hold nothing against them, Single dads/mothers are good people who occupy both the mother and father role. I’m just not the person for a single dad.

 

[Qeelbax]

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[Qeelbax]

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You’re not the spokesperson of men. You are just mrlog. What’s with people thinking they’re the spokesperson of their gender? Whatever Ladylike is saying is wildly unpopular for most women imo. Average woman ain’t interested in being with a single dad.

 

[Qeelbax]

Most people don’t want to raise kids that are not theirs. People are just more honest online. In real life I would tell you offcourse. Kids are blessing and keep it moving.

Damn I would not cap offline.
There’s nothing wrong with not wanting someone who has kids

 

[Qeelbax]

I'd disagree about guys with baggage not marrying single women in the West. I have lost count of the number of divorcee men who remarry a single woman who has never been married. I agree the ideal is to marry a man with no History but the truth is that men are freer when they divorce because they do not get saddled with childcare. There are also notorious cases where some single women actively pursue relationships with guys they know are married because they are attractive, made etc.

They be marrying fobs that have been here for 3 years, they don’t count as western somalis. Good luck getting a genz xalimo to even look your way when you have baggage.

 

[Man with a garuun]

A man gets more reward from marrying a virgin due to the fact the the prophet ﷺ recommended it, u get reward for marrying a widow, but that does not mean u get more reward than marrying a virgin

I think you're literalist who takes hadiths in isolation. The Prophet (scws) were fair to all 3 groups: Virgin, widowed, and divorced. The hadith about marrying virgin and the extra reward for marrying widowed and divorced women are all encouraging us to marry the three groups equally. You need to get the whole context and stop obsessing over 1 part. Islam is providing justice to all 3 groups.

Please listen the lecture again.

 

[Amk]

I think you're literalist who takes hadiths in isolation. The Prophet (scws) were fair to all 3 groups: Virgin, widowed, and divorced. The hadith about marrying virgin and the extra reward for marrying widowed and divorced women are all encouraging us to marry the three groups equally. You need to get the whole context and stop obsessing over 1 part. Islam is providing justice to all 3 groups.

Please list the lecture again.

If they were al equal in reward the prophet ﷺ wouldnt have asked the boy why he didnt marry a virgin.
He would have just accepted it

 

[Angelina]

If they were al equal in reward the prophet ﷺ wouldnt have asked the boy why he didnt marry a virgin.
He would have just accepted it

Erm, he was young men that was never married?! I think correct me If I am wrong but he was a teen!

Obviously a virgin would be better for a young never married man.

 

[Jaydaan]

Damn I would not cap offline.
There’s nothing wrong with not wanting someone who has kids

Sometimes the person is great though. So you have to get rid of the kids. When a lion takes over a herd, he pushes the other mans kids out of the way. They can become a threat later

 

[Man with a garuun]

If they were al equal in reward the prophet ﷺ wouldnt have asked the boy why he didnt marry a virgin.
He would have just accepted it

If that is the case, why then we earn extra reward for marrying widowed and divorcee? The problem with literalists is you take hadiths in isolation. We have both recommendations, so we have to apply logic to it.

Islam is recognizing virgins have more market pool when it comes to getting married than widowed and divorcees; therefore, it is providing an extra reward and encouragement for Muslims to marry widowed and divorced women. At the same time, Islam doesn't want to create injustice towards virgins, so hence the recommendation to marry virgins as well. That is fair and balanced.

Lastly, instead of running with 1 hadith, approach the topic wholly. This is why early Muslims recommended us that when it comes to fiqh (Islamic jurisprudence), we follow one of the 4 madhabs. This whole new exercise that every Tom and Jerry is gonna run with 1 hadith without taking the whole context into the equation is dangerous, and it does disservice to Islam.

 

[TekNiKo]

There is much reward about raising orphans of widowed women. If the dad is still around than it would not be appropriate to raise those children as they can turn on you as quick as a sleight of hand. Disciplining them would also be a headache as you will not maintaining ultimate authority.

“Garoob gabar wadataa guurso”