Why are Xalimos against polygamy?

[ABG]

It's impossible to give the same amount of attention and love to multiple people. Someone will be neglected. If I give all I have to someone, I expect the same in return. Nobody wants to be or feel like the second choice. What is so difficult to understand about that? Also, polygamy is most times a financally disastrous choice. How could the average middle class man afford to fund multiple families? Your children would be neglected as well and that would be heartbreaking to witness. I don't think polygamy is immoral or bad but that it's not the right choice for my happiness. The result would be a bitter me.

With that same logic one shouldn’t have more then one child because it’s “impossible to give your attention and love to multiple people” which simply isn’t true.

 

[TekNiKo]

Too much of a head ache, I rather divorce the old one and marry the new one. I dont even value youth, I value good character.

 

[Leila]

Let’s be real guys , women wouldn’t mind polygamy so much if the man is rich and can spend enough time with each wife/family like those rich Arab odays.


No woman would want to be a second/ third wife to a broke ass guy

 

[dr.leorio]

Step 1: become filthy rich

Step 2: become an alpha Muslim man by learning the deen

Step 3: marry 4 and create a dynasty

_________________________________________

Broke dudes, dusty niggas and no ambition having mfers need not apply

 

[Exodus]

The only reason polygamy is desired is that weirdos think it'll mean a threesome every night, when in fact it's raising multiple families in different homes which is just a big pain in the ass. Not to mention the inevitable jealousy between wives, and it's pretty expensive to manage as a whole.

One wife with a mistress on the side is the way to go

 

[Halimo-2018]

I don’t get why Somali girls would be against polygamy and those who practice it? When there’s a polygamous couple, it’s usually xalimos who would attack the couple on Social media and call them disgusting names. You do know it’s halal if a man wants more than one wife? So your going against the religion when you try to undermine polygamy.

Secondly, they bring feminist BS arguments such as “a Man doesn’t love you if he has more than one wife”

My response: The prophet Muhammad (saw) loved all his wives and practiced polygamy so your argument of a man not loving his wives is BS.

Lastly, I’m only talking about the diaspora women who are influenced with this feminist BS, not those back home.

I am not against it. The older i get the more i get it. If the man is man enough he can handle it then go for it. A lot women now a days have their own money and want only kids. Its a win win situation i guess. However me personally iff i find out my man has another wife i will peacefully pack my bags no drama nothing but thats just me. To each their own.

 

[Tukraq]

The only reason polygamy is desired is that weirdos think it'll mean a threesome every night, when in fact it's raising multiple families in different homes which is just a big pain in the ass. Not to mention the inevitable jealousy between wives, and it's pretty expensive to manage as a whole.

One wife with a mistress on the side is the way to go

why would they think its a threesome? obviously each has there own spot

 

[astorecalledkmart]

Faahiye a Man does not need the permission of his wife to marry a second wife. Hoorta i dislike your name "Faahiye", it sounds Fake news

Women have the right to specify that their husband must ask her permission in order to get a second wife in their marriage contract/agreement before their own wedding. He can marry another wife without her permission if she doesn't expressly say she doesn't want him to

 

[astorecalledkmart]

The context in which the Surah allowing polygamy was revealed was following the Battle of Uhud in which many female orphans were made following the deaths of their fathers. Back then, orphaned girls were abused by society and had their inheritance stolen - marrying more than one wife protected those girls and helped the population grow following a battle in which many men died.

Having said that, polygamy can be dangerous for a man - it's permissibility in Surah Nisa is on the condition that the husband treats all of his wives equally and justly. The same Surah then goes on to say that man is not capable of being completely just. Many men today marry several wives, but have obvious favourites, which is against both the Quran and the Sunnah of the Prophet salallahu alayhi wasalam

 

[Furioso]

With that same logic one shouldn’t have more then one child because it’s “impossible to give your attention and love to multiple people” which simply isn’t true.

I don’t believe you can love your children equally. It’s not done intentionally but deep down one is always favored more. A human being cannot give the same amount of love and in the same way to multiple people. Let’s just agree to disagree. Also, please don’t compare children to romantic partners. They’re completely different relationships.

 

[Tukraq]

I don’t believe you can love your children equally. It’s not done intentionally but deep down one is always favored more. A human being cannot give the same amount of love and in the same way to multiple people. Let’s just agree to disagree. Also, please don’t compare children to romantic partners. They’re completely different relationships.

no, a person can love there children equally and there wives equally, maybe you can't, good thing were talking about men and polygamy and not women(were wired different)

 

[HalimaJ]

lets ask @HalimaJ @Kanini @Furioso @VixR @Desert Flower
Can women be cucked

Nope, but it feels as though we are being 'cucked'. We get the same feeling of humiliation when our other half decides to be with someone else.

 

[lalayariis]

If my husband wanted a second wife, he could have her. He just wouldn’t have his first anymore. It’s his choice, and I’ll give him the option but it won’t be all on his terms. Decisions have consequences, and if you still go ahead and do it then be a man and get ready to face it.

 

[Tukraq]

If my husband wanted a second wife, he could have her. He just wouldn’t have his first anymore. It’s his choice, and I’ll give him the option but it won’t be all on his terms. Decisions have consequences, and if you still go ahead and do it then be a man and get ready to face it.

but he wants a second not only 1, you leaving him would leave him with only 1 again so back to where he started

 

[lalayariis]

but he wants a second not only 1, you leaving him would leave him with only 1 again so back to where he started

And child support
best of both worlds. Supporting two but only having one

 

[Tukraq]

And child support
best of both worlds. Supporting two but only having one

at that point I think he just stays with you and saves costs

 

[lalayariis]

at that point I think he just stays with you and saves costs

I’m not married lol, but I’ll make sure to tell him that in the future when I meet him. Or I might just hit him with a surprise if he tries to test me with that

 

[Tukraq]

I’m not married lol, but I’ll make sure to tell him that in the future when I meet him. Or I might just hit him with a surprise if he tries to test me with that

what if he brings up the possibility before marriage?

 

[lalayariis]

what if he brings up the possibility before marriage?

Then he gets to choose if he wants to marry me or not, and vice versa. For me, if it’s a solid he’s going to get a second wife than I’m just gonna break it when it’s easier. No matter how much I love someone, that’s my number one deal breaker.

 

[Tukraq]

Then he gets to choose if he wants to marry me or not, and vice versa. For me, if it’s a solid he’s going to get a second wife than I’m just gonna break it when it’s easier. No matter how much I love someone, that’s my number one deal breaker.

you just the jealous type? why that number one of all things? especially if he's big rich I'm pretty sure most women share whether its mistreses for caddans and other baby mommas for madows, I would think wives would be more respectable than that