Thanks abayo.
I know you're just looking out for me, but trust me when I say we really know eachother. Thats why im not worried about that aspect at all.
Interracial marriage advice
- Thread starter snds
- Start date
Thanks abayo.
I know you're just looking out for me, but trust me when I say we really know eachother. Thats why im not worried about that aspect at all.
Anyone that marries ajinaabis I automatically assume they suffer from some element of self-hate. Arabs (UAE and Other gulf states) are funding Al-Shaabab. I will forever discriminate any dhega caas. Arabs < Jews
First off, you only have a wedding once so make sure you have an amazing wedding. However when it comes to marriage the only opinions that should matter is youre mom and dads. Is youre eedo or abti gonna decide anything? Is it there marriage? Are you there daughter? Just make sure the marriage is invite only so only invite those you wantHello somali spot!
Im a 22 somali woman, and ive been seeing this arabic guy for around 2 years now, just getting to know eachother sharing different philosophies on life. We share the same views on almost everything, from religion to world perspectives and even how we'd go about it raising a child. Culturally I was also kind of surprised how similar somali and arabic culture is, and to me I believe thats a huge plus to relate to one another. We speak to eachother in english, but we've been trying to learn eachother's languages since that would be very useful communication wise with family.
Well, you get the gist how our relationship works out for us. We want to get married, and here's where im confused how thats supposed to play out. Im not worried about my parents since I know that the thing they value the most is religion and stability (job, education etc). Ofcourse also how he treats me. However, when it comes to aunts and uncles etc, im certain that some of them have a negative views on arabs in general. Which makes me nervous about some aspects, like how is the wedding even going to be like with two cultures that handles weddings in a different way. And family members that are going to attend that dont really approve on the whole marrying an arab thing.
So here's the part where im asking for advice from fellow somalis that maybe either have experienced this themselves or knows someone thats been through this. How would be the best way to go about a wedding, or is it even worth it to have a wedding at all? How have you seen or experienced the cultural clash work out? And why do so many somalis have a problem with interracial marriages?
It's different in practice though I hope it works out well for youThanks for being optimistic about my family's reactions. Inshallah I hope thats how it all plays out.
Also, the part about his family possibly being racist. I'd lie if I said that didnt cross my mind, however I did ask him to test the waters about somalis or generally other cultures and what they think in his family. He said that racism isnt a thing for his parents, and like mine they value that the person is muslim above all.
My family say it's fine whatever I bring home as long as they are Muslim but honestly I know they would be annoyed if I brought a foreigner no matter how perfect
But that's just my family
Everyone's situation is different
The Persians are just as controlling as the Arabs though
Very weird assumption. So anyone who marries outside of either their color or culture, just happens to be miserable with elements of self-hatred? You seem like the one struggling with some issues, if you condemning so many from your own religion to be evil.
If your somali heritage is so precious to you, and anyone else is beneath you, how come white/brown people are the only ones dealing with supremacy issues?
Im feeling secondhand embarrasment from the racist people on this thread. May god guide you.
nope if u lurk a bit longer on this site u will encounter alot of selfhatred
Well, if anyone is struggling with selfhatred, thats a sad sight. But Garen, this is the internet and its full of different types of people. Normal people, people that doesnt have much going on in their lives, people who are depressed and got issues and so on. Theres a fair mixture, so I wouldnt say im surprised that i could encounter selfhatred on a forum with an ok large community. However, I dont believe theres a correlation between my situation where im in such a good place, with selfhatred just because I want to marry outside my own culture. It's a bold assumption made by people without a psychology license & doesnt know me personally.
Your so worried about the aunts in your family been racist or horrible. See you've already ticked the first box of self hate for me. Your quick to assume your somali family will be the problem? Why have negative assumptions for yours when his can be worse. That means your already preparing for a situation where your family or culture is always pleasing or secondary to his own.
Even though you've known him for 2 years do u not think his family might have racist aunts as well!
I will give you advice marry the guy if you believe within yourself its the right thing to do! But never for any amount of love put down or accept to be second! He will only respect you if you respect yourself which 'yourself' is your identity and ethnicity. Arab cultures is strong and will probably influence your children more so than somali culture if you let it.
Good luck!
Even though you've known him for 2 years do u not think his family might have racist aunts as well!
I will give you advice marry the guy if you believe within yourself its the right thing to do! But never for any amount of love put down or accept to be second! He will only respect you if you respect yourself which 'yourself' is your identity and ethnicity. Arab cultures is strong and will probably influence your children more so than somali culture if you let it.
Good luck!
@scarecrow you clearly havent read my topic fully, since you think that I assume when I stated it as a point blank fact in my post. But since you didnt bother to read the important details, let me outline it for you.
They've expressed their hatred for arabs. I didnt assume shit. So before you point your fingers to someone for hating themselves, for the reason of simply marrying someone that respects you, treats you well, have a mashallah deen and daqaan, maybe look yourself in the mirror instead of projecting towards others. You are no psychologist, and you only know 0,001% information about me that I chose to put out on this forum, to gather information primarily from people thats been through the same or have witnessed this scenario.
You clearly dont understand the point about this thread, and it shows. This isn't about pointing fingers on which family member is racist or not. This also isn't about questioning my mental health, which FYI im doing just fine if you even care. I do respect myself, and i do respect my identity and ethnicity. Also, if you truly read my post, you would know that he wants to learn somali. Not only that, he's very interested in knowing more about the culture which i teach him about as the days ago. So tell me, know it all, does that sound like a person who wouldn't respect me or my culture?
They've expressed their hatred for arabs. I didnt assume shit. So before you point your fingers to someone for hating themselves, for the reason of simply marrying someone that respects you, treats you well, have a mashallah deen and daqaan, maybe look yourself in the mirror instead of projecting towards others. You are no psychologist, and you only know 0,001% information about me that I chose to put out on this forum, to gather information primarily from people thats been through the same or have witnessed this scenario.
You clearly dont understand the point about this thread, and it shows. This isn't about pointing fingers on which family member is racist or not. This also isn't about questioning my mental health, which FYI im doing just fine if you even care. I do respect myself, and i do respect my identity and ethnicity. Also, if you truly read my post, you would know that he wants to learn somali. Not only that, he's very interested in knowing more about the culture which i teach him about as the days ago. So tell me, know it all, does that sound like a person who wouldn't respect me or my culture?
Nacalaa kugu yaal, do you think we are cucks who will welcome a race traitor? Did you really think we would come up with advices on how to land an Arab man? Nacalaa adiga iyo arabska women's rights ka naceb kuyaal. Neefette foqal neefette.
Well aren't you one miserable farax. I dont need advice from someone acting up like a classic example of an online in cel. Id marry any race before marrying someone like you, and I could care less if you welcome me or not lmao
I will not marry you kulaha, did I propose?
I said someone like you, try reading next time
If his aunts call you ' Yaa abeeda', do you reply with 'nacam habiibty'?
Afghans are good folks
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