What is your threshold with regards to appearance?

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Insha'Allah that won't happen because I will gage his character before hand.

I can see both sides of an argument that's a ability, I have. Firstly if it's something he feels he wants to do,
Why wouldn't I agree with it.

You have come up with a valid question here. Than a compromise would have to ensure, I'm not going to stop someone from doing something they want. But if his smart and Insha'Allah he will be, if it's not beneficial to him, this hypothetical scenario/decision why wouldn't he see my side of it?

I don't want to be with a stubborn, head headed person. I would rather a rational man, who takes his women's advice.

In a successful marriage their shouldn't be this mentality of it's my way or the highway your giving off.

Decisions not arguments are the way forward.


Like i said. it's not about my way or he high way. you can't survive in a marriage like that. most couples consult each other and then make decisions. However the occasional will pop out where two people feel differently about something and a mexican standoff ensures. that's where trust comes in.
 
Yes, finally someone who understands this show with me.

It's totally plausible and could happen, that's the most crazy part of it.

Dude her husband, I think she's falling for the driver- eye guy though.

I'm watching episode 8 now, the commander is a total control freak,
When he gave her the heels she should've smashed his eyes out lol

when the series finishes I'm going to buy the book apparantely not everything is covered in the series.

Really need spoiler tags with these things.

Man just started watching it

:kendrickcry:

@dhegdheer
 
Really need spoiler tags with these things.

Man just started watching it

:kendrickcry:

@dhegdheer

Sorry sxb will use spoilers.:tacky:

I hope we haven't ruined it for you.
:dead::deadosama:

I'm so sorry fam @cantspeak :kendrickcry: Forget what I said! Delete! Delete! :jcoleno:

What episode are u on?

:ohdamn: Girl you need to watch this show called to night, I'm on epsiode 2. :yousmart: Also just finished episode 8, I want to stitch the commanders slimey lips shut, hahahahahaha
 
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Like i said. it's not about my way or he high way. you can't survive in a marriage like that. most couples consult each other and then make decisions. However the occasional will pop out where two people feel differently about something and a mexican standoff ensures. that's where trust comes in.

Are you a salafi? :sass2:
 
I know what the word means, I know what the prophet pbh meant by it.

You carry the Arab mentality with you, if she's cool with that than good for you both.

However, you mentioned you having the final word and the hierarchy statement. I don't agree with those
Personally scream male chauvinist to me.

They're will be 2 head of house holds me and my husband Insha'Allah.

I won't let no one stir the ship, when there's space for two.

Anyway you have found someone masha'Allah who understands you. That is all that matters.

I understand what you mean and I can relate to it to an extent
However I try to set these feelings of pride or annoyance aside for the sake of Allah swt
I don't like the sound of it either, many women don't, but I try to remember who made these rulings and that is Allah swt. Us humans are flawed and we let emotions, bad experiences and /or false assumptions cloud our jugement.
Remember He always knows better. Men aren't worth more than women. And if your husband ever abuses his head of household task, that will be seen by Allah swt and he will be held accountable. It's a big responsibilty.

From when I was I child I did not like being told what to do and accepting someone above me can make the decisions without so much as asking me what I think about it. That was when I was just a kid and it hasn't changed. I don't have an overly rebellious personality but I absolutely HATE men playing the big boss in a marriage and deciding things for their wives. Overall the general traditional male female roles rub me the wrong way. Always did. Especially the word obedience would awake this uneasy feeling inside of me. Fury, frustrations. All probably fueled by Shaytaan lol.

But I am trying to find a balance between staying true to myself & not disregarding the deen.
I hope to do this by marrying a non dominant guy who is less likely to abuse his position. A marriage where obedience is not a daily To Do. Absolute nightmare. I'm fine with him calling the shots on big things though but my opinion still should weigh on the matter. But if he loves you that's a given.

I like to see it as a test..there is something in the Deen I don't like. How do I deal with this matter? As a muslim, you have to humble yourself and know that even though you are very convinced of your own truth, you will never know better than He who created mankind.
 
I understand what you mean and I can relate to it to an extent
However I try to set these feelings of pride or annoyance aside for the sake of Allah swt
I don't like the sound of it either, many women don't, but I try to remember who made these rulings and that is Allah swt. Us humans are flawed and we let emotions, bad experiences and /or false assumptions cloud our jugement.
Remember He always knows better. Men aren't worth more than women. And if your husband ever abuses his head of household task, that will be seen by Allah swt and he will be held accountable. It's a big responsibilty.

From when I was I child I did not like being told what to do and accepting someone above me can make the decisions without so much as asking me what I think about it. That was when I was just a kid and it hasn't changed. I don't have an overly rebellious personality but I absolutely HATE men playing the big boss in a marriage and deciding things for their wives. Overall the general traditional male female roles rub me the wrong way. Always did. Especially the word obedience would awake this uneasy feeling inside of me. Fury, frustrations. All probably fueled by Shaytaan lol.

But I am trying to find a balance between staying true to myself & not disregarding the deen.
I hope to do this by marrying a non dominant guy who is less likely to abuse his position. A marriage where obedience is not a daily To Do. Absolute nightmare. I'm fine with him calling the shots on big things though but my opinion still should weigh on the matter. But if he loves you that's a given.

I like to see it as a test..there is something in the Deen I don't like. How do I deal with this matter? As a muslim, you have to humble yourself and know that even though you are very convinced of your own truth, you will never know better than He who created mankind.


If you marry a Somali, more likely than not you will have no issues of a man Pickering with a woman about roles .

By culture, Somalis tend to let the wife take charge of her home and there are no restrictions to who she talks to, who comes to the house from her relatives ,and what she does in her house. There is a code of trust in that she will always do what is right for her marriage and relationship. There is no default suspicion on her for any reason.

There will be the one woman who will betray that trust and cultural freedom, and so some men betray it too. But all in all, we are not obsessed with who leads the house.

One marries a woman to share tome, life, finance, pain and joy, so there is no need to worry about roles . When a wife fails to hold the standards, the door is always open so she can pursue her ways unhinged.
 
I understand what you mean and I can relate to it to an extent
However I try to set these feelings of pride or annoyance aside for the sake of Allah swt
I don't like the sound of it either, many women don't, but I try to remember who made these rulings and that is Allah swt. Us humans are flawed and we let emotions, bad experiences and /or false assumptions cloud our jugement.
Remember He always knows better. Men aren't worth more than women. And if your husband ever abuses his head of household task, that will be seen by Allah swt and he will be held accountable. It's a big responsibilty.

From when I was I child I did not like being told what to do and accepting someone above me can make the decisions without so much as asking me what I think about it. That was when I was just a kid and it hasn't changed. I don't have an overly rebellious personality but I absolutely HATE men playing the big boss in a marriage and deciding things for their wives. Overall the general traditional male female roles rub me the wrong way. Always did. Especially the word obedience would awake this uneasy feeling inside of me. Fury, frustrations. All probably fueled by Shaytaan lol.

But I am trying to find a balance between staying true to myself & not disregarding the deen.
I hope to do this by marrying a non dominant guy who is less likely to abuse his position. A marriage where obedience is not a daily To Do. Absolute nightmare. I'm fine with him calling the shots on big things though but my opinion still should weigh on the matter. But if he loves you that's a given.

I like to see it as a test..there is something in the Deen I don't like. How do I deal with this matter? As a muslim, you have to humble yourself and know that even though you are very convinced of your own truth, you will never know better than He who created mankind.

A lot of people are not taking the time to fully comprehend, what I'm saying.

Instead you guys are being stubborn and arrogant in you're opinions.

What is the problem? However I chose to be within my future marriage is mine alone Insha'Allah.

If you want to be obedient to everything you're husband will do and say go ahead. I'm not stopping anyone.

Listen, I'm a humble person, who uses logic and reasoning in everything, I do
And say.

You stated you're hoping to marry a non dominant man, so he isn't too controlling. I want a equal an equal
Not someone, who is less dominant than
Me. You will see that he will be a push
Over and it won't work.

So you're telling me that, if I'm in a wonderful, loving marriage and we
Are practicing the deen, but me and
My husband both decide on issues
Together and we consulate eachother
that's against the teachings of the
Quran? No, leave your emotions
Out of this and read it again.

Regardless everyone is different, just respect that fact, like I have you're
Opinions today.
 
I have only two rules:

1: Be attractive

2: Don't be unattractive


Same one rule said in different ways. Does it matter if he has bad hygiene btw? Often a beautiful woman walks past everyone else to sit next to me on the train ride and I almost want to puke out of the stench coming from her mouth, or the feeling that she didn't take shower for days. Same with many men dressed in suits and looking like managers, but when they talk to you, you wish they kept their mouths shut.

Attractiveness, good looks, fitness, all qualities people are obsessed with require more of a personality, hygiene, and conduct for the good looks to be of use.

Like, who would say hello to an insane good looking woman? some are sick and would hit her up and move on, but in truth, what matters at the end of the day is not so much about the visuals but what comes after.
 
Same one rule said in different ways. Does it matter if he has bad hygiene btw? Often a beautiful woman walks past everyone else to sit next to me on the train ride and I almost want to puke out of the stench coming from her mouth, or the feeling that she didn't take shower for days. Same with many men dressed in suits and looking like managers, but when they talk to you, you wish they kept their mouths shut.

Attractiveness, good looks, fitness, all qualities people are obsessed with require more of a personality, hygiene, and conduct for the good looks to be of use.

Like, who would say hello to an insane good looking woman? some are sick and would hit her up and move on, but in truth, what matters at the end of the day is not so much about the visuals but what comes after.

Attractive is the full judgement of all the qualities of a person in one summation. Maybe he got a stench but that booty and body is one fire.
 
Attractive is the full judgement of all the qualities of a person in one summation. Maybe he got a stench but that booty and body is one fire.


Who says that stench does not extend to the booty and body? If the person smells from a short distance, does it even matter what their body looks like? Guess desperation for a dick lowers standards sometimes for some women.


If you don't pass the sniff test


:camby:


Best Regards.
 
Who says that stench does not extend to the booty and body? If the person smells from a short distance, does it even matter what their body looks like? Guess desperation for a dick lowers standards sometimes for some women.


If you don't pass the sniff test


:camby:


Best Regards.

Guess desperation for a dick lowers standards sometimes for some
women.


IMG_6425.GIF
 
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