I understand what you mean and I can relate to it to an extent
However I try to set these feelings of pride or annoyance aside for the sake of Allah swt
I don't like the sound of it either, many women don't, but I try to remember who made these rulings and that is Allah swt. Us humans are flawed and we let emotions, bad experiences and /or false assumptions cloud our jugement.
Remember He always knows better. Men aren't worth more than women. And if your husband ever abuses his head of household task, that will be seen by Allah swt and he will be held accountable. It's a big responsibilty.
From when I was I child I did not like being told what to do and accepting someone above me can make the decisions without so much as asking me what I think about it. That was when I was just a kid and it hasn't changed. I don't have an overly rebellious personality but I absolutely HATE men playing the big boss in a marriage and deciding things for their wives. Overall the general traditional male female roles rub me the wrong way. Always did. Especially the word obedience would awake this uneasy feeling inside of me. Fury, frustrations. All probably fueled by Shaytaan lol.
But I am trying to find a balance between staying true to myself & not disregarding the deen.
I hope to do this by marrying a non dominant guy who is less likely to abuse his position. A marriage where obedience is not a daily To Do. Absolute nightmare. I'm fine with him calling the shots on big things though but my opinion still should weigh on the matter. But if he loves you that's a given.
I like to see it as a test..there is something in the Deen I don't like. How do I deal with this matter? As a muslim, you have to humble yourself and know that even though you are very convinced of your own truth, you will never know better than He who created mankind.
A lot of people are not taking the time to fully comprehend, what I'm saying.
Instead you guys are being stubborn and arrogant in you're opinions.
What is the problem? However I chose to be within my future marriage is mine alone Insha'Allah.
If you want to be obedient to everything you're husband will do and say go ahead. I'm not stopping anyone.
Listen, I'm a humble person, who uses logic and reasoning in everything, I do
And say.
You stated you're hoping to marry a non dominant man, so he isn't too controlling. I want a
equal an
equal
Not someone, who is less dominant than
Me. You will see that he will be a push
Over and it won't work.
So you're telling me that, if I'm in a wonderful, loving marriage and we
Are practicing the deen, but me and
My husband both decide on issues
Together and we consulate eachother
that's against the teachings of the
Quran? No, leave your emotions
Out of this and read it again.
Regardless everyone is different, just respect that fact, like I have you're
Opinions today.