Somali spot women learn from this lady😀 you relationship will last for life time

[Mercury]

I always thought that the thirsty men were the worst. Like knowing decent guys or even good looking that are doing well for themselves, knowing their plenty of good women after them for something serious but then seeing these guys go after unattractive obses Women because she has a hole and willing to put out has left disgusted me multiple times.

On the hand, there are ridiculous amount of women with no self-esteem. They have high standards when their searching for their man but once in a relationship? Their standards become just like the thirsty. So many good women happy getting the bare minimum is a joke

Instead of if she had a hole we are good. It if he stays with me we are good.

i think those who go for many wives they tired of their wife instead of working on their marriage and rekindle the spark they want to get a new wife

 

[Farahslayer]

I'm guessing you're from the North right? I constantly here that narrative from Waqooyis. I'm from the South and I would say Konfur couples are no different apart from being a lot more polite to each other. Yet, lack of affection is common, husband and wives hardly being around each other is common and men marrying a woman twenty years his junior is common, more so than the Northerners I would say. Most of this jeceyl is mostly in music and poems oh and during the shukansi stage.

The only group I would say have affection on average more so than us ethnic Somalis are the reer Xamars. They are known to stay together well into old age and enjoy each others company, which is ironic as their marriages are mostly arranged.

What he means by cringe inducing is saying a few nice words. This is the level of affection that Somalis can barely tolerate.

I think it’s changing overall but the culture caters to men so much that even the men aren’t happy. It’s so bizarre

 

[Desert Flower]

May god all grant us raaliyo wives, ameen. I don’t think anything is worse than being trapped in a marriage with these feminist women.

The thing is, you don’t want a raaliyo woman though. A submissive, obedient wife that will do everything. There are so many women who are willing to wash your feet and wipe your bum, yet you want to force a woman who’s educated and has a career and her own mind to submit to you. Therin lies the problem (I’m not talking to you).

 

[Farahslayer]

They’re shown too much love and there’s little expectation from them. A recipe for disaster.

Everything else you said was facts. It’s def worship of men and you must cater to their whim and desire. Dare ask what do you get in return and watch and see what these habaryars and ayeeyos say.

I do wonder if some women are forced to marry and have kids, with the way they are so miserable 24/7. I don’t get that.

Most of the times Somali habayars/hooyos encourage their daughters to marry for reproduction only. I don’t see them encouraging for love, wealth, protection just sperm donors. Maybe that affects what Somali men see themselves as? How are you going to aspire to a healthy marriage if your looking for a sperm donor or a womb?

They also haveunhealthy attitudes towards parenting, ie birth as many kids as possible so you have someone to take care of you in old age.

The entire culture needs a reset.

 

[Angelina]

The thing is, you don’t want a raaliyo woman though. A submissive, obedient wife that will do everything. There are so many women who are willing to wash your feet and wipe your bum, yet you want to force a woman who’s educated and has a career and her own mind to submit to you. Therin lies the problem (I’m not talking to you).

They spend most of their days battling women who they feel don't conform to their narcissistic narrative, instead of going off living a supposedly happy life.

Don't even get me started on their use of the word 'feminist'. At this point, any women that says men need to treat women with respect, and that women have Islamic rights some Somali men violate it is now called a 'feminist'. Its straight up gaslighting.

 

[Lostbox]

The thing is, you don’t want a raaliyo woman though. A submissive, obedient wife that will do everything. There are so many women who are willing to wash your feet and wipe your bum, yet you want to force a woman who’s educated and has a career and her own mind to submit to you. Therin lies the problem (I’m not talking to you).

They should go for religious Somali girls.

They want women who would marry young, who will not post embarrassing video online, aren't loud and always dress modesty. Virgin, submissive and happy to listen to their husbands and so on

Like 70% Somali women.

 

[Desert Flower]

Most of the times Somali habayars/hooyos encourage their daughters to marry for reproduction only. I don’t see them encouraging for love, wealth, protection just sperm donors. Maybe that affects what Somali men see themselves as? How are you going to aspire to a healthy marriage if your looking for a sperm donor or a womb?

They also haveunhealthy attitudes towards parenting, ie birth as many kids as possible so you have someone to take care of you in old age.

The entire culture needs a reset.

How? When there are women who reinforce the culture. It’s going to be difficult. Most Somalis don’t know how to parent and they have kids for all the wrong reasons.

There are women who cry about how awful their husbands are yet turn their nose up at you when they find out you’re single. Honestly, let those types suffer because that’s what they want.

They spend most of their days battling women who they feel don't conform to their narcissistic narrative, instead of going off living a supposedly happy life.

Don't even get me started on their use of the word 'feminist'. At this point, any women that says men need to treat women with respect, and that women have Islamic rights some Somali men violate it is now called a 'feminist'.

They don’t even understand what that word means. I’m convinced the anger comes from the fact that this generation of women are standing up to the misogyny and many men cannot handle it. They banked on treating their wives and children just like the older men and are upset that they cannot.

 

[Farahslayer]

They should go for religious Somali girls.

They want women who would marry young, who will not post embarrassing video online, aren't loud and always dress modesty. Virgin, submissive and happy to listen to their husbands and so on

Like 70% Somali women.

These girls want their match and unfortunately the types that are obsessed with these things aren’t chaste, have issues in regards to modesty themselves, don’t respect women, won’t provide 100%, don’t pray etc

Somali guys need to look at what they offer and go with the type of women they’re compatible with not with a woman that makes them look good.

If you hang out and smoke 2/3 nights of the week you aren’t going to enjoy a marriage with a wife who gives you looks when you leave with the boys. That’s IF you are able to marry that type.

 

[Lostbox]

i think those who go for many wives they tired of their wife instead of working on their marriage and rekindle the spark they want to get a new wife

I agree but that not what I am talking about. There are many women with high standards when looking for a man but the complete opposite once in the relationship. They get a guy with a great personality, good income, comes from a good family, went to went to the top school, tall, good looking and so on

But his a terrible father, barely helps with the the housework or the kids. Forget birthday's, anniversary, doesn't know the school his kids goes to, no romance or gifts since they've settle down. Other then bring in the income. He barely does anything.

How many women do you thing are will to put up with that?

 

[Xaruun]

All of you xaarlimos are going overboard with the farax hate

 

[Desert Flower]

These girls want their match and unfortunately the types that are obsessed with these things aren’t chaste, have issues in regards to modesty themselves, don’t respect women, won’t provide 100%, don’t pray etc

Somali guys need to look at what they offer and go with the type of women they’re compatible with not with a woman that makes them look good.

If you hang out and smoke 2/3 nights of the week you aren’t going to enjoy a marriage with a wife who gives you looks when you leave with the boys. That’s IF you are able to marry that type.

Why is it that Somali guys love hanging with their homies 24/7? All the time? It’s not something they grow out of. They’ll leave their wife to hang with their friends and come home at 3 am. It’s something I’ve seen married women talk about and have experienced and that’s pathetic.

Alot of our men lack maturity and an ability to think for themselves. His friends, and family will be doing the thinking for him, and your marriage will be too crowded.

Also, why is it a challenge to find a man who’s family oriented and is a qawaam? Most Somali families are fragmented, with the dad on one side and the kids and mom on the other. They don’t move as a unit and that’s the problem. This issue spans generations, even though our generation is a *bit* better but we still have a long way to go.

 

[World]

The thing is, you don’t want a raaliyo woman though. A submissive, obedient wife that will do everything. There are so many women who are willing to wash your feet and wipe your bum, yet you want to force a woman who’s educated and has a career and her own mind to submit to you. Therin lies the problem (I’m not talking to you).

I don’t want an “educated” career woman who wants to work 9-5 and buys takeaway food for me. Wash my feet and wipe my bum? I can do that myself, what a weird thing to say.

 

[Farahslayer]

Why is it that Somali guys love hanging with their homies 24/7? All the time? It’s not something they grow out of. They’ll leave their wife to hang with their friends and come home at 3 am. It’s something I’ve seen married women talk about and have experienced and that’s pathetic.

Alot of our men lack maturity and an ability to think for themselves. His friends, and family will be doing the thinking for him, and your marriage will be too crowded.

Also, why is it a challenge to find a man who’s family oriented and is a qawaam? Most Somali families are fragmented, with the dad on one side and the kids and mom on the other. They don’t move as a unit and that’s the problem. This issue spans generations, even though our generation is a *bit* better but we still have a long way to go.

Because they’re raised to believe that’s what masculinity is. A man with his wife is considered feminine. Whilst it’s ceeb for a married woman to spend time with her gfs it’s pretty much encouraged to do the opposite.

It’s why married Somali women tend to be the loneliest or heavily rely on family for companionship (to an extreme)

 

[Farahslayer]

I don’t want an “educated” career woman who wants to work 9-5 and buys takeaway food for me. Wash my feet and wipe my bum? I can do that myself, what a weird thing to say.

What would you say an ideal marriage would be?

 

[Desert Flower]

I don’t want an “educated” career woman who wants to work 9-5 and buys takeaway food for me. Wash my feet and wipe my bum? I can do that myself, what a weird thing to say.

I was making a point that there are women who will literally do anything you want and cater to you, yet the fixation is on wanting the very women who you say you despise. It doesn’t make sense, does it?

It’s clear that you think in black and white because who says an educated women doesn’t cook, clean and also work? Why must you assume that you’ll be eating takeout 24/7?

It’s fine if you don’t want an “educated” woman. It’s your prerogative.

 

[World]

I was making a point that there are women who will literally do anything you want and cater to you, yet the fixation is on wanting the very women who you say you despise. It doesn’t make sense, does it?

It’s clear that you think in black and white because who says an educated women doesn’t cook, clean and also work? Why must you assume that you’ll be eating takeout 24/7?

It’s fine if you don’t want an “educated” woman. It’s your prerogative.

Perhaps a minority of men will demand a woman to change for marriage, but most men don’t. If I want a woman to wear a hijab and be modest, then I wouldn’t be interested in a woman who doesn’t wear a hijab. Likewise I’m not interested in a career feminist woman who spends her time working 10 hours a day and trying to get a promotion, whilst her children are neglected and in need of their mother.

 

[Desert Flower]

Because they’re raised to believe that’s what masculinity is. A man with his wife is considered feminine. Whilst it’s ceeb for a married woman to spend time with her gfs it’s pretty much encouraged to do the opposite.

It’s why married Somali women tend to be the loneliest or heavily rely on family for companionship (to an extreme)

This makes sense. It’s sad. Yet we’re called man haters for pointing out the truth.

No male sspot poster has given reasons why it’s beneficial to be in a relationship with a Farax. Maybe because there is none (unless you consider having full Somali kids a benefit).

 

[Angelina]

Perhaps a minority of men will demand a woman to change for marriage, but most men don’t. If I want a woman to wear a hijab and be modest, then I wouldn’t be interested in a woman who doesn’t wear a hijab. Likewise I’m not interested in a career feminist woman who spends her time working 10 hours a day and trying to get a promotion, whilst her children are neglected and in need of their mother.

You can go for what you want without insulting and belittling. I have women in my family who work demanding jobs like being doctors who are amazing mothers and I also know housewives who talk on the phone all the time about the latest dirac and the kids get no help with homework, but are on their ipads all the time.

Equating any women whose life choices you don't agree with as 'feminist' is ridiculous. Also, i've seen you go on about the high cost of living in the UK and how hard it is for only the man to work, yet now you're coming for mothers that work?!

 

[Desert Flower]

Perhaps a minority of men will demand a woman to change for marriage, but most men don’t. If I want a woman to wear a hijab and be modest, then I wouldn’t be interested in a woman who doesn’t wear a hijab. Likewise I’m not interested in a career feminist woman who spends her days working 10 hours a day and trying to get a promotion, whilst her children are neglected and in need of their mother.

Again, this lacks nuance and is so exaggerated that I question if you’ve ever been around a working mother (no hate, just curious). The vast majority of women work in service-related fields that don’t require promotions (nurse, teacher, social work etc).

It’s up to you if you want a stay at home woman, but don’t put down other women in order to uplift your position. Believe it or not, many women are required to work because one income isn’t enough. Period.

Moreso, a stay at home woman is a luxury in this economy and no, making her to live in government housing and getting social assistance isn’t a short-cut route to achieve this goal.

 

[adventurequestworlds1.0.2]

I agree but that not what I am talking about. There are many women with high standards when looking for a man but the complete opposite once in the relationship. They get a guy with a great personality, good income, comes from a good family, went to went to the top school, tall, good looking and so on

But his a terrible father, barely helps with the the housework or the kids. Forget birthday's, anniversary, doesn't know the school his kids goes to, no romance or gifts since they've settle down. Other then bring in the income. He barely does anything.

How many women do you thing are will to put up with that?

If woman cant help her man financial then he shouldnt helped her with house since it is her Job and the man Job is provide