Somali girls are evil

[gurey]

You expect women to sacrifice their rights, just because you're broke. Not fair. Do the decent thing and wait.

Thats why I reckon girls her age should look at guys atleast 5 years older that are bit more established if she wants marriage at that age.

 

[TekNiKo]

Can someone explain the logic behind not marrying whilst broke?
If a guy is broke then ok but if he gets rich why should he marry?
Shouldn't the ideal be 2 broke ppl get married and hustle together ?
I'm noticing cadaan couples stick together a lot more even when broke.

Its very sad sxb, did you know back in the day marriage was easier than zina? Now its opposite I blame the families for pumping the price of marriage to make untenable. This is literally what Shaydaan wants and it worked perfectly. More materialistic women = more angry men. More angry men = societal collapse.

 

[digaagjecel]

Had my heart broken by this woman named Tammy. But ho*s gon' be ho*s, so I couldn't blame Tammy-Lil Wayne

 

[KobeBryant]

Girlfriend/boyfriend relationships are haram. Which is why you should try to get to know someone for marriage for a few months to a year. 3 years is the same lengh as a degree, within 3 years people are having two kids ect. Us Somalis are conservative, stop promoting this nonsense. If you don't have your shit together, don't talk to women.

@Basra help, this women is crazy

 

[Nak-Muay-Kru]

Getting married doesn't have to = moving in together right away. They could've just gotten married to the relationship halal and lived with their respective families until they were in a better place financially. But I doubt 90% of girls that age would agree to such an arrangement.

At least she had enough decency to tell him, a gaal sharmuta would've started fucking the other guys on the side while she was still with your friend lol. He should be thankful that he got that knife in the heart and not in the back.

 

[Angelina]

Getting married doesn't have to = moving in together right away. They could've just gotten married to the relationship halal and lived with their respective families until they were in a better place financially. But I doubt 90% of girls that age would agree to such an arrangement.

At least she had enough decency to tell him, a gaal sharmuta would've started fucking the other guys on the side while she was still with your friend lol. He should be thankful that he got that knife in the heart and not in the back.

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[TekNiKo]

Getting married doesn't have to = moving in together right away. They could've just gotten married to the relationship halal and lived with their respective families until they were in a better place financially. But I doubt 90% of girls that age would agree to such an arrangement.

At least she had enough decency to tell him, a gaal sharmuta would've started fucking the other guys on the side while she was still with your friend lol. He should be thankful that he got that knife in the heart and not in the back.

You are a very wise man, this is what Desi students do until they are financially stable. That way these students can have a halal relationship without strain.

 

[Nak-Muay-Kru]

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I may be embarrassing, but it works. I know atleast 3 couples who had that set-up, one of whom were Somali, and their marriages are still stronger than ever. The other marriages where the couples moved in together right away all fell apart

The alternative is zina. My married friends who follwed that model all have fulfilling and clean lives, whereas the rest of us who thought we should "wait and get money first" are all jaded from years of partying and zina. We should making marriage easier for people instead of holding them to some of these ridiculous standards wallahi, it's just harmful and accomplishes nothing.

You are a very wise man, this is what Desi students do until they are financially stable. That way these students can have a halal relationship without strain.

I WISH I did the same thing wallahi and unlike Pajeet culture, Somali mother in laws are abusive nightmares for the most part. Multi generational households and making marriage easier for people are the only way we're going to come out of this shit unscathed.

 

[Angelina]

I may be embarrassing, but it works. I know atleast 3 couples who had that set-up, one of whom were Somali, and their marriages are still stronger than ever. The other marriages where the couples moved in together right away all fell apart

The alternative is zina. My married friends who follwed that model all have fulfilling and clean lives, whereas the rest of us who thought we should "wait and get money first" are all jaded from years of partying and zina. We should making marriage easier for people instead of holding them to some of these ridiculous standards wallahi, it's just harmful and accomplishes nothing.



I WISH I did the same thing wallahi and unlike Pajeet culture, Somali mother in laws are abusive nightmares for the most part. Multi generational households and making marriage easier for people are the only way we're going to come out of this shit unscathed.

Nah, Somali mother in laws are hardly abusive as we have strong boundaries in our culture. The joint family system can be so toxic that even Islamic speakers and scholars have spoken about it. Abuse is rife and there is a reason why women are entitled to their own spaces as situations like that arise.

You can't compare it to couples that moved in together and say its stronger as 90% of the world move in together straight away.

Honestly, its too much of risk for a family to allow for their daughter which is why a lot of families do not allow it. You'll understand when you become and father.

 

[Nak-Muay-Kru]

Nah, Somali mother in laws are hardly abusive as we have strong boundaries in our culture. The joint family system can be so toxic that even Islamic speakers and scholars have spoken about it. Abuse is rife and there is a reason why women are entitled to their own spaces as situations like that arise.

Joint family systems work when there's no abuse, which there isn't in most Somali daughter/mother-in-law relationships. But you have to make some scarfices, one of them being privacy, but that's a small price to pay all things considered. Besides, there's nothing wrong with being on birth control until both of you are in financially stable enough to start a family.

 

[Nak-Muay-Kru]

Nah, Somali mother in laws are hardly abusive as we have strong boundaries in our culture. The joint family system can be so toxic that even Islamic speakers and scholars have spoken about it. Abuse is rife and there is a reason why women are entitled to their own spaces as situations like that arise.

You can't compare it to couples that moved in together and say its stronger as 90% of the world move in together straight away.

Honestly, its too much of risk for a family to allow for their daughter which is why a lot of families do not allow it. You'll understand when you become and father.

Joint family systems work when there's no abuse, which there isn't in most Somali daughter/mother-in-law relationships. But you have to make some scarfices, one of them being privacy, but that's a small price to pay all things considered. Besides, there's nothing wrong with being on birth control until both of you are in financially stable enough to start a family.

When I do become a parent, inshallah, I'll do everything in my power to ensure my daughter's marriage is successful. If that means taking some of the burden off her husband until they can get on their feet then so be it.

 

[Angelina]

Joint family systems work when there's no abuse, which for most Somalis there wouldn't be. But you have to make some scarfices, one of them being private, but that's a small price to pay all things considered. Besides, there's nothing wrong with being on birth control until both of you are in financially stable enough to actually start a family.

I don't think its a small price to pay, especially if it has an impact on your marriage which for the most part it does for many. Believe me, i'm a bit older than you with friends who've lived in such a set-up and their relationship with their husband suffered badly. The reason why Somali in-laws have good boundaries is because as a culture we don't like to live together and invade each others space especially when its a young couple who are still getting to know each other which is a sensitive time. In saying that, some people are lucky enough to make this work, but its a lot to consider and it isn't a small sacrifice to make.

 

[Angelina]

Joint family systems work when there's no abuse, which there isn't in most Somali daughter/mother-in-law relationships. But you have to make some scarfices, one of them being privacy, but that's a small price to pay all things considered. Besides, there's nothing wrong with being on birth control until both of you are in financially stable enough to start a family.

When I do become a parent, inshallah, I'll do everything in my power to ensure my daughter's marriage is successful. If that means taking some of the burden off her husband until they can get on their feet then so be it.

It's a risk, because i've heard of many cases of men becoming complacent. Islamically, when your daughter marries, her husband now has the responsibility to look after her, he is now officially her Qawwum. When you allow a man to marry her without any sort of responsibility and she's staying in your house, what incentive is there for him to actually start maning up? He's getting everything he wants without the responsibility and you're banking on potiential. What if she becomes pregnant? Does she live under your roof like a single mother whilst you pay for your grandkids because he's young and broke?

In theory it sounds great. As a man getting a woman hassle free, with no responsibilities great. Its beneficial for YOU as a man, but could potientially F up a girls life. But not a lot of parents would feel comfortable with that. At the end of the day, no one is asking for a millionaire. Just the basics. A roof over her head ect then Khalaas. Money comes and goes.

 

[Nak-Muay-Kru]

I don't think its a small price to pay, especially if it has an impact on your marriage which for the most part it does. Believe me, i'm a bit older than you with friends who've lived in such a set-up and their relationship with their husband suffered badly. The reason why Somali in-laws have good boundaries is because as a culture we don't like to live together and invade each others space especially when its a young couple who are still getting to know each other which is a sensitive time.

It's a small price to pay when the alternative is divorce, which is usually due to the financially burden of having to look after a family on a shit entry level salary. I know people it's worked for and you know people it hasn't worked for, it's all anecdotal but I think it's a better than the shit we have at the moement.

It's a risk, because i've heard of many cases of men becoming complacent. Islamically, when your daughter marries the man that has married her now has the responsibility to look after her, he is now officially her Qawwum. When you allow a man to marry her without any sort of responsibility and she's staying in your house, what incentive is there for him to actually start maning up? What if she becomes pregnant? Does she live under your roof like a single mother whilst you pay for your grandkids because he's young and broke?

I understand that Islamically he's responsible for her, but that doesn't absolve me of my responsiblity as a parent. Times are hard financially and they'll only get harder by the time I have a daughter who's of age. I don't want my daughters to engage in zina, so I see this as the perfect compromise. Besides, it wouldn't be indefinitely, it's just until they can get on their feet. You mentioned single mother, but that's exactly what she'll become if I don't step in and ease the financial strain.

Most people have to have roommates, that's how fucked the housing situations is in most mid-size cities. Why put that burden on some poor uni student who's probably not going to make enough money to support a family for the next 5-10years? Parents need to step in and take some responsiblity if they want their children's marriage to work wallahi. Because letting them struggle is only going to cause their marriage to implode

It's not about getting a woman "hassle free" walal, it's about ensuring the success of the marriage.
What benefit would I as a man reap from this if my father did something like this for my sister?
I get that men need to step up etc, but you need to look at the economic situation. Shit's brutal out there wallahi.

 

[Angelina]

It's a small price to pay when the alternative is divorce, which is usually due to the financially burden of having to look after a family on a shit entry level salary. I know people it's worked for and you know people it hasn't worked for, it's all anecdotal but I think it's a better than the shit we have at the moement.


I understand that Islamically he's responsible for her, but that doesn't absolve me of my responsiblity as a parent. Times are hard financially and they'll only get harder by the time I have a daughter who's of age. I don't want my daughters to engage in zina, so I see this as the perfect compromise. Besides, it wouldn't be indefinitely, it's just until they can get on their feet. You mentioned single mother, but that's exactly what she'll become if I don't step in and ease the financial strain.

Most people have to have roommates, that's how fucked the housing situations is in most mid-size cities. Why put that burden on some poor uni student who's probably not going to make enough money to support a family for the next 5-10years? Parents need to step in and take some responsiblity if they want their children's marriage to work wallahi. Because letting them struggle is only going to cause their marriage to implode

I think you'd find that for the most part a lot of girls can contain themselves and if this was to happen 9/10 times this is something that will soley benefit your son in law, whilst it can put your daughter in a difficult predicament.

But in saying that, if you're afraid that your daughter will go off with him, then yes your hands are tied. Better that situation, than zina. So I see where you are coming from. Sometimes in life we have to be practical.

But I don't think it should ever be the norm. As a group, we already complain about some Abdis shirking their responsibilities ect, imagine if this was normalised? It would be worse. People already blame benefits for making men complacent. Nothing motivates a man more knowing he has a wife and kids at home he has to look after.

 

[Nak-Muay-Kru]

I think you'd find that for the most part a lot of girls can contain themselves and if this was to happen 9/10 times this is something that will soley benefit your son in law, whilst it can put your daughter in a difficult predicament.

But in saying that, if you're afraid that your daughter will go off with him, then yes your hands are tied. Better that situation, than zina. So I see where you are coming from. Sometimes in life we have to be practical.

But I don't think it should ever be the norm. As a group, we already complain about some Abdis shirking their responsibilities ect, imagine if this was normalised? It would be worse. People already blame benefits for making men complacent. Nothing motivates a man more knowing he has a wife and kids home he has to look after.

You're still looking at this in a weird adversarial "Abdis need to step up" way. I get that it'll benefit guys, but it'll also benefit women and the marriage a whole. Most divorce happen over finances, why not ease that burden? I'm not saying it should be forver, just for few years while they figure things out.

Why not do it as a group? This isn't about supporting men in shirking their responsiblities, it's about offering a helping hand to young couples who can't make it through the current economic shit-show. As a community, we're not in a place where we can give a young couple 50-100k to start their new lives, we need to do the next best thing to ensure the longivity of the marriage.

Will some dickhead take advantage of this and not step up? absolutely. But overall, it'll be a net positive for our community. The current "you're married, get the f*ck out" model clearly isn't working.

 

[wheel]

Dont know why ppl are justifying her actions by bringing up the diin, doesnt seem like her decision to leave him was motivated by religion. nor is the one she's entered halal either. Within that context she's deserving of being called unfaithful and all the other negative attributes that cheaters carry.

 

[Nak-Muay-Kru]

Dont know why ppl are justifying her actions by bringing up the diin, doesnt seem like her decision to leave him was motivated by religion. nor is the one she's entered halal either. Within that context she's deserving of being called unfaithful and all the other negative attributes that cheaters carry.

She's a scummy cheater for talking to another guy behind his back if they were exclusive, but she did ultimately tell him. Most gaal yats would have an entire relationship behind your back without batting an eye lol

 

[Angelina]

Dont know why ppl are justifying her actions by bringing up the diin, doesnt seem like her decision to leave him was motivated by religion. nor is the one she's entered halal either. Within that context she's deserving of being called unfaithful and all the other negative attributes that cheaters carry.

How do you know she isn't talking to the next guy so that she can get married? Lets be real, most Somalis before marriage get to know their partners before marriage.

A woman/man you're not married to cannot be unfaithful to you. When you talk about marriage and she becomes your fiancée that is when she is being unfaithful. That goes for men as well.

Anyways, let me introduce you to a famous Somali saying. My Somali writing is shit and someone will translate a woman speaks to 1000 men and marries 1.Meaning she'll get to know different people and only one will become her true partner.

Someone write the ful mahmah please.

 

[World]

You are a very wise man, this is what Desi students do until they are financially stable. That way these students can have a halal relationship without strain.

No they don’t literally 99.9 % of them don’t marry before finishing college