Is there any truth that Somali girls HATE their fathers? And if so, why?

[blackbanana]

I think that your story is too convenient and if it is true then I’m sorry but you’re a terrible person for wishing ill on your father.

It's not convenient. Lots of kids have deadbeat dads.

I wish him worse. It's important we all be strong.

 

[somaliaristocrat]

I think that your story is too convenient and if it is true then I’m sorry but you’re a terrible person for wishing ill on your father.

@blackbanana

he has a point, its good he is a motivator for you but to wish ill on him even if he is a deadbeat, you must also remember he also is the reason to why you exist, for what reason he didnt wanna see you ill never know and understand but despite everything hes wronged you. he is your biological father.

 

[Reign]

I have a better relationship with my father than my mother. All Somalis I know except one come from two parent households. I don’t know where this stereotype of deadbeat Somali fathers is coming from. Even when divorced Somali fathers are still involved in their children’s lives from what I’ve seen.

 

[blackbanana]

he has a point, its good he is a motivator for you but to wish ill on him even if he is a deadbeat, you must also remember he also is the reason to why you exist, for what reason he didnt wanna see you ill never know and understand but despite everything hes wronged you. he is your biological father.

You don't know how hard it was for me and my siblings to have a father who abandoned us. Two parent household individuals will never understand. My mom had to work another job and that meant while she was working to feed and house us, we barely saw her and we had to be more independent. I had to teach myself and do everything on my own at a very young age. I am very hesitant to get into a relationship now because I don't want my kids having a deadbeat dad.

I'm stronger for it. Nothing strengthens you as a individual like a parent who abandons you

 

[Reign]

I hate mine. I haven't seen him since I was around 4 or 5. He has another family in Nairobi. I tried to reach out to him lots and few years ago (last attempts) but I was told by my favourite auntie who I trust with everything that I can't reach him because he doesn't want anything to do with me. I'm working hard to become a dentist (I got accepted!!) and become rich and successful so I can show him that I never needed him

Why don’t you try reaching out to him instead of taking your aunties word for it?

 

[blackbanana]

Why don’t you try reaching out to him instead of taking your aunties word for it?

He never reached out to me once since he left us. My parents never fought and are not even divorced in the Islamic sense. He just up and left us. My mom gave me his home number to call after she got it from his family. I called many times and he told his kids to tell me that he wasn't there... even at night and early mornings. She said she would never call him. I think she only gave me his number because I kept asking and she wanted me to see the reality that he didn't want me.

 

[Reign]

He never reached out to me once since he left us. My parents never fought and are not even divorced in the Islamic sense. He just up and left us. My mom gave me his home number to call after she got it from his family. I called many times and he told his kids to tell me that he wasn't there... even at night and early mornings. She said she would never call him. I think she only gave me his number because I kept asking and she wanted me to see the reality that he didn't want me.

Sorry to hear that sis, he sounds like a bum. You are better off without him, one day he’ll come running, tell him to f*ck off when that time comes.

 

[blackbanana]

Sorry to hear that sis, he sounds like a bum. You are better off without him, one day he’ll come running, tell him to f*ck off when that time comes.

Thank you. I will make sure of that

 

[Reign]

Thank you. I will make sure of that

But honestly don’t let your useless sperm donor father make you think badly of all men. Insha’Allah you’ll find someone who’s good. Look for men raised in two parent households and never date men from single mother household because they tend to think it’s okay to divorce/leave or w/e.

 

[Kudhufo Kadhaqaq]

I have seen more Somali females with mommy issues than Somali females with daddy issues.

 

[somaliaristocrat]

You don't know how hard it was for me and my siblings to have a father who abandoned us. Two parent household individuals will never understand. My mom had to work another job and that meant while she was working to feed and house us, we barely saw her and we had to be more independent. I had to teach myself and do everything on my own at a very young age. I am very hesitant to get into a relationship now because I don't want my kids having a deadbeat dad.

I'm stronger for it. Nothing strengthens you as a individual like a parent who abandons you

Your hatred for your father fuels you, what i still dont understand why he would just stay the hell away from you like your the plague, is there something your mum aunty know and it is between them and him. Thats weird for even a bum to do.

 

[Reign]

Your hatred for your father fuels you, what i still dont understand why he would just stay the hell away from you like your the plague, is there something your mum aunty know and it is between them and him. Thats weird for even a bum to do.

That’s what I was thinking, even bums wouldn’t do that. Yaab!

 

[blackbanana]

But honestly don’t let your useless sperm donor father make you think badly of all men. Insha’Allah you’ll find someone who’s good. Look for men raised in two parent households and never date men from single mother household because they tend to think it’s okay to divorce/leave or w/e.

On the contrary, I think men from one parent households is what I am looking for (only those who are mentally strong and just like me).

 

[blackbanana]

Your hatred for your father fuels you, what i still dont understand why he would just stay the hell away from you like your the plague, is there something your mum aunty know and it is between them and him. Thats weird for even a bum to do.

My mom didn't do anything because my mom is still friendly with his side of the family and that is how she got his number. They are angry at him for what he did. He went to a younger woman. She ended up dying and he married another younger woman.

 

[Gambar]

My mom didn't do anything because my mom is still friendly with his side of the family and that is how she got his number. They are angry at him for what he did. He went to a younger woman. She ended up dying and he married another younger woman.

Jaw! He married another young one. Amuu jiranyahay.

 

[somaliaristocrat]

My mom didn't do anything because my mom is still friendly with his side of the family and that is how she got his number. They are angry at him for what he did. He went to a younger woman. She ended up dying and he married another younger woman.

Ooooh....he tried more than one wife, im not judging you. But ive heard of somali cases when men go for a second younger wife the first wife is sometimes not happy with it. Not only that but he went for another after she died?

He was actually hellbent on a polygamous relationship.

 

[blackbanana]

Jaw! He married another young one. Amuu jiranyahay.

I am researching how to not have a man abandon his kids because I don't want my kids (if I do get kids) to go through what I and my siblings went through. I can live if I go through a divorce which would hurt for a while but I don't want my kids to be hurt for life. Your father abandoning you is more hurtful than your husband abandoning you. Your father is your flesh and blood and from the beginning.

 

[somaliaristocrat]

I am researching how to not have a man abandon his kids because I don't want my kids (if I do get kids) to go through what I and my siblings went through. I can live if I go through a divorce which would hurt for a while but I don't want my kids to be hurt for life. Your father abandoning you is more hurtful than your husband abandoning you. Your father is your flesh and blood and from the beginning.

You May hate me for saying this but personally i dont see anything wrong with more than one wife. Its a bit hectic when you are going for a younger one particularly after youve had 1 kid with another, let alone 4.

I just feel him and your mother didnt see eye to eye on this matter.

Also dont paint guys in one brush. One thing that gets annoying when a girl begins to paint an entire gender in one brush over their personal experience with one. Dont do that. Because plenty of guys on here who will probably troll and bash at you.

 

[blackbanana]

You May hate me for saying this but personally i dont see anything wrong with more than one wife. Its a bit hectic when you are going for a younger one particularly after youve had 1 kid with another, let alone 4.

I just feel him and your mother didnt see eye to eye on this matter.

Also dont paint guys in one brush. One thing that gets annoying when a girl begins to paint an entire gender in one brush over their personal experience with one. Dont do that. Because plenty of guys on here who will probably troll and bash at you.

He left us while we were at school/daycare and while my mom was at work. He left a note saying he left and we never saw him again. It was sudden. I believe what my mother and aunt told me before him.

 

[Ubax45_]

Thank you. I will make sure of that

It's better to forgive