Foreign marriage horror stories: SHARE

[Vanessa]

This is my favorite mixed marriage. Too bad it ended bad, but at least she had lots of babies with him! Yum

They got beautiful kids mashaalllah.

 

[Basra]

They got beautiful kids mashaalllah.

I always knew she will. She is a smart cookie. All dark skin girls should follow her advice to improve genes. She made niin gaal a muslim, had his dutch muslim babies, and now her babies will be called Gorgeous, something that she was never called! I say, ambition mission complete.

 

[Vanessa]

I always knew she will. She is a smart cookie. All dark skin girls should follow her advice to improve genes. She made niin gaal a muslim, had his dutch muslim babies, and now her babies will be called Gorgeous, something that she was never called! I say, ambition mission complete.

That’s not something to be proud of, alhamdiilah she has healthy children but her children don’t have self belonging since they have mix heritage and they are not accept in Somali and Dutch community. That’s really sad tbh.

 

[Basra]

That’s not something to be proud of, alhamdiilah she has healthy children but her children don’t have self belonging since they have mix heritage and they are not accept in Somali and Dutch community. That’s really sad tbh.

Not really. Where is the mothers mother? Ayeeyo? Aunts ? Uncles? She should set the example. The children will follow what she does.

 

[Abdurahman_somali]

Post the English link then.

I honestly cannot see in anyway how it is looked down upon to marry outside your culture when Islam teaches us to live as one ummah.

Looked down it the wrong expression.

Let me explain it more detailed. In Islam there is a concept called Kafa'ah which can roughly be translated as compatibility between two people, who wanna marry each other. The question in Islamic law amongst scholars was, what does compatibility incorporate ? Some argued it is just religiosity, whereas many other scholars stated out that the wealth, lineage and social status are also incorporated. Among those with the second postion was Imam Shaafici (Somalis mostly follow his Madhab).

Generall speaking a marriage in Islam needs the permission of three persons: The man, the women and the 'Wali' (in most cases her father). Not matching the elements of Kafa'ah means that the father has a legit reason to refuse another man to marry his daughter. For example when a foreigner wants to marry a woman, the father has every right to refute him. Similarly a rich man can refuse his daughter to a poor man.

This does not mean a marriage without Kafa'ah (compatibility) is not valid, i.e. Xaraam. If the father (the wali) allows this marriage, everything is perfectly fine and there are many examples: Bilal Habashi RA married his Arab wife, althoug they had different lineages and social status.

Bottom line: according to most Madhaahib it is permissible for a wali to refuse the marriage of his daughter to a foreigner. There is a wisdom to look for compatible partners for your children, to make sure they will have harmony in their marriage.

I will later on post some videos and some written texts as source.

 

[Muji]

Unfortunately not, she literally acted like a crazy person refusing to stay in the house. Her behaviour was that of a person under black magic.

Sis I hate to break this news to you but black magic doesn’t exist.

Maybe he tried to rape her? That sounds more plausible...

 

[Muji]

There was a farax who was arrested this week after fleeing to Panama and without any sense of irony the OP makes this thread.

Let people marry who they want to marry.

 

[NAAFO]

They use Somali women/girls as bait to prevent "reverts" from marrying their own girls.

@Finesse your so right even though the preference of these reverts is arab and asian women this is true as its known these reverts have satated it that they prefer arab and asian women.

 

[jamal9]

 

[jamal9]

 

[NAAFO]

@Whimsical fanatic

I’ve an aunt who tells such stories with gusto and she is a twice divorcee & ironically, both of her ex-husbands are Somalis. Misery loves company.

@AussieHustler it seems unlike certain people? Your aunt seems like a proud somali who loves her men as well as her people if only the apple didn't fall far from the tree regarding certain people?

 

[Nilotufian]

A tip for Somali men;

Never eat food cooked by a random woman, not foreigners or even Somali. Black magic practitioners add their period blood to food to make a man "obsessed" with them.

Take them out to eat or you cook for them.

 

[NAAFO]

@jamal9 who are they?

 

[Jaydaan]

This is my favorite mixed marriage. Too bad it ended bad, but at least she had lots of babies with him! Yum

Isnt she the one that married a nazi? Or was it another burned darkie?

 

[AussieHustler]

@AussieHustler it seems unlike certain people? Your aunt seems like a proud somali who loves her men as well as her people if only the apple didn't fall far from the tree regarding certain people?

@NAAFO

Sxb, it would've been better for my aunt if she learns to butt out over the affairs of other people especially couples who are in love with each other and happily raising their children together and re-evaluate her own life and concentrate to improve it. Her children are becoming like her and that is sadder.

 

[Inquisitive_]

Mosques love giving Somali girls/women away like candy because many Somali women/girls don't have protective men at home who will chase the revert away/vet them appropriately.

When you are thrown out of the house and your entire community is in shamble's, it's impossible to be proactive or protective as a Father.

Even in a two parent functional household this task is made very difficult in this shameless diaspora society along with our broken community.

Somali men/boys need to start being pro-active in finding suitable men for their female relatives.

I agree, I am in that position right now, but found a shameless culture in our community were this is frowned upon and I understand why, and if you know our culture you would know what it is.

Somali women only fall for foreigners if there are not enough compatible suitors.

Those foreigners in the majority of case are far worse then the farax's they claim to run from, that is a poor argument you presented, the opposite is true, they are simply not wanted by the average farax.

 

[Dibleyy]

There are evidences and i wouldn't make such a claim, without knowing what i'm talking about. These are not my words, but the opinion of the islamic scholars of the past. Some modern Islamic preachers, mainly Salafis, have changed this understanding of intercultural marriage.

Let me know if you want Arabic or English sources. I will post it later then. But if you wanna argue just for the sake of arguing, i don't wanna waste my time.

I dont, I agree interracial relationship are difficult but saying the prophet s.a.w encouraged us to stay in the same race is just wrong. Why would the prophet s.a.w tell his people to marry only the same of allah s.w.t creation? Legit makes no sense, scholars and sheikhs are completely different from the word of the prophet s.a.w, spreading false information and hadiths is a major sin. Just link the source if you have it

 

[Dibleyy]

Xenophobic?
Not at all.

Most Somali marriages to foreigners don't work out, it's a fact.

Most Somali marriages dont work period

 

[Dibleyy]

Looked down it the wrong expression.

Let me explain it more detailed. In Islam there is a concept called Kafa'ah which can roughly be translated as compatibility between two people, who wanna marry each other. The question in Islamic law amongst scholars was, what does compatibility incorporate ? Some argued it is just religiosity, whereas many other scholars stated out that the wealth, lineage and social status are also incorporated. Among those with the second postion was Imam Shaafici (Somalis mostly follow his Madhab).

Generall speaking a marriage in Islam needs the permission of three persons: The man, the women and the 'Wali' (in most cases her father). Not matching the elements of Kafa'ah means that the father has a legit reason to refuse another man to marry his daughter. For example when a foreigner wants to marry a woman, the father has every right to refute him. Similarly a rich man can refuse his daughter to a poor man.

This does not mean a marriage without Kafa'ah (compatibility) is not valid, i.e. Xaraam. If the father (the wali) allows this marriage, everything is perfectly fine and there are many examples: Bilal Habashi RA married his Arab wife, althoug they had different lineages and social status.

Bottom line: according to most Madhaahib it is permissible for a wali to refuse the marriage of his daughter to a foreigner. There is a wisdom to look for compatible partners for your children, to make sure they will have harmony in their marriage.

I will later on post some videos and some written texts as source.

Yes but where was this encouraged by the prophet s.a.w so show the links?? Where's the hadith? you just keep mentioning scholars words but that doesnt mean much. Wealth, lineage and social status are things of this world, we are encouraged to leave them behind, you really think allah s.w.t and the prophet cared about wealth and lineage and social status those are the things he spoke against. Allah s.w.t has told us to never seek out wealthy people and it is a sign of greed so your whole statement makes no sense. Why dont you just send the link?

 

[VixR]

xenophobia at it's finest hour. It starts from don't marry from that clan to don't marry foreigners. Why do people worry about who others marry? 99% of Somalis marry other Somalis and we have a crisis of divorces and family dysfunctions. Fix yourself, family and then, mind your own businesses.

Couldn’t have been put better.

I personally know successfull Somali/non-Somali marriages, whether the Somali is male or female, and it’s not the doom and gloom portrayed here.