who's to blame for the rise of single mother households?

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The thing that healthy families have in common that dysfunctional ones are missing is the parents having respect for one another as adults and recognize the importance of the other, and both parents actively taking in role in upbringing the kids.

In your typical somali dysfunctional family, the husband believes himself to only be there for financial support. Now when the wife makes money of her own and on top of that receives aid, this is a recipe for disaster because she is also already doing household work, caring for the kids etc. In her mind, the husband becomes useless and she loses respect for him. And without a wife having respect for her husband, no marriage is gonna work like that. These kind of men get constantly nagged and belittled by their wives and later, the mom gets full custody and they don't even try. They are too lazy

The amount of fathers who are willing to walk out is probably a very small number, same with women who just want to kick the man out and block their kids dad out of their lives. In the case where a father takes his parenting seriously, do you really think he would get kicked out :rolleyes:
 
With the wives (from those kinds of marriages), their problem is most of them are too stress provoking. They make their husbands feel useless by doing every thing themselves, and make their homes an uncomfortable environment to be in, and this causes him to be constantly stressed out and maybe even flea. Thats why I think this "strong independent woman" mentality that destroyed the black community is so detrimental!

Bottom line, I think somali people need to stop this nonsense of who is the "less bad"sex, or whatever else and start focusing on solutions rather than trying to look ways to save face and throw blame in another direction and make excuses. it just doesn't help. If anything it causes more dysfunction in our already broken community
 
Sorry, I got carried away and didnt realize I wrote an essay LOL

I edited out huge chunks to respect the somali adhd
 
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Basra

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The thing that healthy families have in common that dysfunctional ones are missing is the parents having respect for one another as adults and recognize the importance of the other, and both parents actively taking in role in upbringing the kids.

In your typical somali dysfunctional family, the husband believes himself to only be there for financial support. Now when the wife makes money of her own and on top of that receives aid, this is a recipe for disaster because she is also already doing household work, caring for the kids etc. In her mind, the husband becomes useless and she loses respect for him. And without a wife having respect for her husband, no marriage is gonna work like that. These kind of men get constantly nagged and belittled by their wives and later, the mom gets full custody and they don't even try. They are too lazy

The amount of fathers who are willing to walk out is probably a very small number, same with women who just want to kick the man out and block their kids dad out of their lives. In the case where a father takes his parenting seriously, do you really think he would get kicked out :rolleyes:


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Sex macaan Macaan
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The women. :manny:

They got too caught up with neo feminism. Women want security and freedom at the same time. A woman should submit to her husband, that's her place in marriage. Let the man do his duty and you do yours, problems arise when wax walba lai'sku qaso and no one knows their role.

If as you say, a woman can provide for herself and do everything herself, why does she even need a man?:cosbyhmm: If it is for the kids, then she should make it clear upfront that after kids come, she'll divorce him, or find a man who's on board with a deal like that.


Society in general is a cycle of patriarchy, gynocentrism and collapse eventually. The Somali community is somewhere between the latter two right now and there's absolutely nothing we can do about it. Let's just watch as everything goes to shit.
 

Gambar

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The women. :manny:

They got too caught up with neo feminism. Women want security and freedom at the same time. A woman should submit to her husband, that's her place in marriage. Let the man do his duty and you do yours, problems arise when wax walba lai'sku qaso and no one knows their role.

If as you say, a woman can provide for herself and do everything herself, why does she even need a man?:cosbyhmm: If it is for the kids, then she should make it clear upfront that after kids come, she'll divorce him, or find a man who's on board with a deal like that.


Society in general is a cycle of patriarchy, gynocentrism and collapse eventually. The Somali community is somewhere between the latter two right now and there's absolutely nothing we can do about it. Let's just watch as everything goes to shit.
Iska amuus aboow.
 
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