psyche
To each their own
It’s emic vs ettic your looking at it from an outsiders view, according to Islam there’s no such thing as not choosing to be gay, it is a willing choice as well as all these haram fetishes are a choice and you chose to fall into them and having haram desires is not good you need to purify your mind and ask for sincere tawbah
Desires are our no.1 enemy for a believer, some people just cannot help but be attracted to what they truly desire.