Somali and family planning

Yeah, agreed that a lot of Somalis aren't great parents, but Africa in general gets painted with this brush all the time of "too many kids". Of course they end up having a lot of kids when most won't make it to their 5th birthday or they're from a country that has been at war with itself since the beginning of time.

For all the large families, Somalis only number around 15 million total in the world (i.e., Somalis die in huge numbers), and Africa barely hits a billion with the smallest ecological footprint on the planet. Europeans can pull the "we have such low fertility rates, look at how great we are card" because they literally went nuts having 30 kids each for centuries and have spilled over across at least three continents and now number in the billions. On top of that, one European literally uses up the same amount of resources as like 20 Africans. China and India each both outnumber Africa as a continent, but you don't hear people complaining of Asia's population.

I agree that parents should be better parents, and that they shouldn't have so many children if they will not take care of them, but the argument always does annoy me a little considering the underlying tone of "too many kids" is often thinly-veiled European hypocrisy aimed at Africans.
 
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I partly felt like a monster, bc instead of just saying “AUN, so sad”, bc I felt sympathy for the situation, I also felt a mixture of irritation/anger enough to say something further, bc wallahi, there’s no earthly reason a parent’s passing should render 11 children motherless, especially here in the West. There was zero thought there, not in quality of life, nor in death.

They keep having them bc the men want ridiculous amounts of kids so they don’t get left for another. It’s dumbest, most vulnerable reasons when you look into on the female side. No young girl thought to herself, “I’m planning to have 11 kids”. She was rendered a brood made, not a person.

Yeah I didn't say anything there because I felt bad for thinking about it so I made another post also I deffo agree no young woman plans to have 11 kids until being treated as nothing other than a baby incubator
 

IftiinOfLife

Raw Hard Truth
I wouldn't be anywhere without my parents, good or bad, they helped shaped me to be the person I am today.

I am half abo and half hoyo.
 
Ikraan, in all honesty, somalis know how to reproduce. But, when it comes to financial stability they heavily lack. In the west , a somali family could have 5-6 kids without contemplating about the hardship of looking after all those children. But, they may get assistance from the government. Therefore, I think if you earn less than £50000 combined with a partner then you shouldn't be able to have 2 children. Overall, I think the idea of somalis of having too many kids could be traditional. But, I believe in a common sense approach.

I don't think 1st generation Somalis living in the west will have as many kids as the previous generations due to social and cultural change idk...my guess ‍♂️
 
I don't think people who grew up in the west will have a lot of kids. I just don't get why people have a kid so quickly after marriage. I wouldn't until we reached year 2 of marriage. Why take the risk of being a single mom like that when divorce is so common?
 
I think the Prophet (PBUH) said something along the lines of have many kids.

It is Allah who feeds. So continue to multiply.
 
I partly felt like a monster, bc instead of just saying “AUN, so sad”, bc I felt sympathy for the situation, I also felt a mixture of irritation/anger enough to say something further, bc wallahi, there’s no earthly reason a parent’s passing should render 11 children motherless, especially here in the West. There was zero thought there, not in quality of life, nor in death.

They keep having them bc the men want ridiculous amounts of kids so they don’t get left for another. It’s dumbest, most vulnerable reasons when you look into on the female side. No young girl thought to herself, “I’m planning to have 11 kids”. She was rendered a brood made, not a person.

This is true. ‘Hebel has 8 kids younger than my youngest, so I need to have more to catch up to him!’ meanwhile you have no clue what’s going on with your living children. A shame! But wallahi, I’ve wondered why are Somali women on board with this? How can a man negotiate you about your reproductive rights? How many Somali hooyos are struggling to get by, while having 7,8, 9 + kids in the west? Why do women keep having more children with their bum husbands? I don’t get it. :faysalwtf:


But all in all, AUN to the young mother and her unborn child. May Allah grant them jannahtul firdaus. I feel for those children.
 
I don't think people who grew up in the west will have a lot of kids. I just don't get why people have a kid so quickly after marriage. I wouldn't until we reached year 2 of marriage. Why take the risk of being a single mom like that when divorce is so common?
Divorce is common. And a lot of couples don’t practice family planning, hence why you see a Somali wife pregnant right after the wedding. They’re careless about it.
 

IstarZ

A mere finger can’t obscure the sun.
Divorce is common. And a lot of couples don’t practice family planning, hence why you see a Somali wife pregnant right after the wedding. They’re careless about it.

That’s why they want to marry them young so they can keep impregnating them until their 30. Of course you will fall apart at 30 when you’ve been popping out kids back to back from the age of 20. Sometimes I do feel women are viewed as baby making machines in our community. They have no other value. It’s pretty sad.

Nothing wrong with wanting to settle down and have a family but women need to look after their mental and physical health. Often they have kids to keep the man around. She is so busy with the kids and has no time to pamper herself, and his eyes are wandering looking for the next incubator.
 
Remember one time some girl said to me family ain't a real somali family cuz my mum had 3 kids and not a lot. Dunno how she survives living in cramp London with 7 siblings smh. I could nevaaaa
:idontlike:
Personally I want 2 kids and that's it
 
Remember one time some girl said to me family ain't a real somali family cuz my mum had 3 kids and not a lot. Dunno how she survives living in cramp London with 7 siblings smh. I could nevaaaa
:idontlike:
Personally I want 2 kids and that's it


Wallahi, it's a good choice because the more kids you have the more likely you might experience financial instability. :ufdup:
 
Children are an investment. If raised on deen and akhlaq,will be of great support and will carry on your name for the ages to come:banderas:

I understand where you are coming from. But, from a financial point of view it can be difficult to support a family with numerous children. Therefore, certain amount of people have a lot of children deliberately so they can seek government assistance. The monetary gain those people get from government assistance are from people that work their socks off day in day out (taxpayers) .
 

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