Should we marry outside?

No, she said they weren’t interested in being in a relationship and aren’t serious. That doesn’t mean they weren’t interested in her, per say, which is what you suggested.

Re-read OP’s post.
keep defending ur sistah.

it'd be better if you told her the truth.

she has issues she needs to work on.

it makes no sense to talk to that many guys and have all them turn you down.

most faaraxs are garbage too, that says a lot about her.
 
No, she said they weren’t interested in being in a relationship and aren’t serious. That doesn’t mean they weren’t interested in her, per say, which is what you suggested.

Re-read OP’s post.
She literally said she wants them to become more interested, and even changes her voice during phone calls :heh:

I don't know why you're deflecting the truth, but she's getting rejected by a lot of faraaxs. They are not interested in her, and don't want to be serious with her. Hell she even says that they're bored of her.

It can't be their fault if all of them are uninterested. There clearly are things she should be working on, and I think she's telling us the full story.

Give good and honest feedback instead of making her feel good about herself for the sake of it. The best thing she needs is honesty.
 
I'm not having any luck with Somalis Loool. This is probably a problem with somalis across the diaspora. I see a lot of Somalis vent about this too, but I don't want to be single forever. I'm a grown woman and want to settle down with someone. I'm irritated by all of this. So many people around me are nearly 30 or above and still single. I'm afraid I am going to be the same. I talked to plenty of Somali men online since the pandemic started and none of them really wanted a relationship or were bored. I was a penpal most of the time. I got tired of all the games and don't use dating apps no moe or talk to them. I did have some phone calls recently with a few guys, and I wasn't getting any hint of interest from them. I was thinking that I might come off too strong and excited when I talk to a guy. I also have a habit of changing my voice to sound more attractive, and to get them to be more interested. Maybe I should look for a non-somali partner, but I'm not that attracted to them now and all the risks of them having racist family members or not being fully accepted by in-laws. And then you have the Somali men that shame Somali women for marrying outside and saying their kids ain't Somali, yet we all know how hard it is to find marriage with somalis these days. These brothers don't even seem to want us ladies anymore. Is any other sister going through this too?
Do what’s best for you. Somali men marry out all the time, can’t see why a Somali woman can’t.
 

Figo

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Ffs thought you meant outside outside was about to say this bradar is starving.



Who you marry shouldn’t matter. Do what makes you happy. Somali’s will always be Somali’s they’ll talk about you wether you marry from within or out. Waa dad caqli yar oo bini Adamka kale ku mashquula. Actually I take that back. Dadka caqli yar waxa laga helaa every community. They’re always busy with other people and not themselves. Hebel did this, heblaayo did that
:mindblown: They gossip men and women. Always stay away from people like this.

Anyway like I said do what makes you happy. At the end of the day it’s your decision.
 

Figo

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My experience with Somali guys has been the opposite. They seem to really want a marital commitment sooner and it scares me. :stressed:
:reallymaury:Qof kaa mar marsiyo badan ma arkin.

Let me guess few of them got a calool and they’re too lazy to lose the calool and that scares you?:mjcry:If it’s not calool is it the legs or the bidaar?:jcoleno:


Sometimes I forget you’re from Canada meesha rag ma jogaan. :mjlaugh:
 
TBH ask ur mom or dad to see if they think any guy might be suited for you. that you avoid the bullshit and the other person will be serious since their parents are involved. ask ur friends too or go to weddings and scout than ask the women around.
If you don’t live in a place with a decent amount of somalis which i doubt, than see what the issue with you is.
 
too many people responding don't know where to start lool. I just wanted to say that my parents are okay with me marrying an ajanabi alhamdulillah. I just am attracted to East African men, and not having any luck with one. I'm considering just giving men from other communities a chance instead. End of the day idc about this qabil stuff and just want a good muslim man that doesn't have a gross past of sleeping around and is moderately practicing. This is hard to find.
 
I did gain weight during this pandemic all from binge eating and being depressed which I am working on. I went to therapy recently too. I am not being a bad person to these men that are turning me down. The problem I did have was being too naive and carried away. I also did go after the wrong men because of trauma and not thinking I was deserving of a good man. I'm not a bum either. I recognize my issues and am working on it, but does that mean I can't find a man styll? I see women of all shapes, and sizes getting booed up. I ain't even that bad looking either.
 
#celibacyforlife!
giphy.gif
 
too many people responding don't know where to start lool. I just wanted to say that my parents are okay with me marrying an ajanabi alhamdulillah. I just am attracted to East African men, and not having any luck with one. I'm considering just giving men from other communities a chance instead. End of the day idc about this qabil stuff and just want a good muslim man that doesn't have a gross past of sleeping around and is moderately practicing. This is hard to find.


Even Bantus? :hmm:
 
too many people responding don't know where to start lool. I just wanted to say that my parents are okay with me marrying an ajanabi alhamdulillah. I just am attracted to East African men, and not having any luck with one. I'm considering just giving men from other communities a chance instead. End of the day idc about this qabil stuff and just want a good muslim man that doesn't have a gross past of sleeping around and is moderately practicing. This is hard to find.
There are Sudanese men and Eritrean men that are mostly Muslim. Anyways, find who you wanna be with and ignore these trolls who are hell bent at making you feel like you’re the problem (hint hint, you’re not. Many women who are looking for marriage are also having a tough time.)

All the best on your search.
 

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