SomaliSteel
No dictator can imprison a population forever.
Disclaimer: I consider myself black and I don't believe in the myth that Somalis are actually Arab. When I say black I just mean the Africans that were in America for generations, unlike me where I'm a first generation Somali with immigrant parents.
Some background. I'm an 18 year old Somali female who was born and raised in America. I don't wear the hijab but I am Muslim but am not one of the best, I'm more of a cafeteria Muslim. I have never dated but I will. I am too embarrassed to ask any of my black friends but do you guys find East African girls unattractive? I am ashamed to say I have spent quite some time today searching stuff online but came across stuff saying 'why black guys like white girls' and 'why black guys won't date black women'. This is very different from the assumptions I had because the guys at my school seem to dig the black girls. They constantly flirt with the extroverted black girls, and I'm a bit more introverted so I feel like guys will never give me the time of the day and they don't. Okay they do, and I have some friends and many acquantices the are black guys. We hang out just fine but they don't seem to see me as someone to date and none of them have said to me they like me. I am friendzoned. Every. Single. Time.
I feel like they look for and want actual 'black girls' (don't ask me which group that is, I found out in 5th grade that apparently I'm not really black and African American from them themselves), the ones that will plop down on their lap in class spontaneously when they're not even dating, the lives of the party.
Am I fetishizing black men? No, its just that all my hardcore crushes (4) were black, African American, descendants of the kidnapped Africans centuries ago, descendants of the slaves, whatever. Only one was Somali.
I still remember 6th grade. We were 12. It was a cold morning in homeroom class. We divided into groups for discussion and sat next to an open window. My teeth were chattering and I couldn't even say anything. The boy sitting next to me turned and looked at me. "Are you cold?", he said. I nodded mutely. He got up and pulled the window down, struggled a bit but finally closed it. He sat back down and turned to me again. "Is it okay now?" I nodded again. But my heart was fluttering and I was in full crush mode. And that people is how I developed my first crush.
I don't even know why I mentioned that. So can you please answer the question very honestly? Be brutal.
Edit: I also wanted to add, I don't think I'm ugly, I actually think I'm good looking. Many of my friends (girls) tell me I'm pretty. I played tennis, varsity the past 3 years. I also love running and hiking, so I'm fit. My hair is also soft, like really soft for an African, and past my shoulders. Hey that's what society is into so I'm mentioning it. I also like taking care if myself but I don't where makeup alot, only on rare festivities. It takes a too much time and effort to learn, and I lot of times of looking horrible to get it right, and I also had allergies as a child so I'm wary of chemicals. So only lip stick/gloss and kohl eye liner. I may look very plain looking. Oh I'm also not flat chested. I just became concerned because I graduated highschool and after trying to become close with all my crushes not one confessed that they like me too. Pray for me college is different.
sad state
