Samaalic Era
QurboExit
Thats true. However marriage changes you and you cant as disconnected but at the same tiome you cant be a open book. You have to show some of your mental state and thoughts to your spouse and keep some locked away for men
I never let people get too close to me, is this normal?
- Thread starter World
- Start date
Indeed, sharing things with your wife/husband is important.
I relate with you 100
But not since childhood
I would say from 19yrs old onwards
Especially in my early 20s and now in my mid 20s
Too many fake people out there
Hard to come by genuine & good vibes people especially in our community but hey
I just use my sparetime to hustle & plan
You don't need many people anyway
My hoyo is only person I confide in...I trust Allah with the rest
I’m the same way and want to fix it. Being alone is overrated and frankly boring. I’m going to try harder to make friends.
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This life is all about balance walaal. I was exactly like you. And honestly its not all because of yourself, most people are not worth your emotional investment and not everyone should deserve to see your vulnerable side.
That being said it may come down to the fact that you have friendships out of convenience and not be genuinely friends with them. I am not friends with many but I am very social but its good to keep most people at a length from you. However when you meet certain friends especially during challenging times in your life you will build very strong relationships and you will want to open up to them. You just have to get rid of your pride and speak. The older I get the more real friendships ive built especially during very difficult times in my life so I no longer am in your situation. Friendships come and go and you should be very selective with who you let in.
In terms of family this is one i still struggle with. It may be cultural factors and just my family structure but I dont personally think there is anything wrong with not revealing your issues to your family unless it is seriously impairing. I like to have a more nurturing relationship with my parents because I dont want them to worry. Nothing wrong with that imo.
That being said it may come down to the fact that you have friendships out of convenience and not be genuinely friends with them. I am not friends with many but I am very social but its good to keep most people at a length from you. However when you meet certain friends especially during challenging times in your life you will build very strong relationships and you will want to open up to them. You just have to get rid of your pride and speak. The older I get the more real friendships ive built especially during very difficult times in my life so I no longer am in your situation. Friendships come and go and you should be very selective with who you let in.
In terms of family this is one i still struggle with. It may be cultural factors and just my family structure but I dont personally think there is anything wrong with not revealing your issues to your family unless it is seriously impairing. I like to have a more nurturing relationship with my parents because I dont want them to worry. Nothing wrong with that imo.
I'm like you....
Younes Osman
VIP
I have associates not friends
exactly, that's my motto
Dude , can you stop with this bro science BS that you throw around. It's not 'MaNlY' to not form close ties with others it's simply an internal belief of inadequacy.
As for @World , psychologists suggest people who find it hard to form intimate relationships have grown up in an non-growth inducive environment.Whereby, at a young age if you had committed a mistake it was met with anger rather than nurture and explanation.
Such an environment is in essence a "betrayal" environment, where your parents/guardians have "betrayed" you by getting angry.
A person who suffers from this predicament should endeavor to form long lasting relationships. This will help you further actualize your self as its only through understanding others do you truly begin to understand yourself.
Gaming, social media and technology kills a lot of human empathy. I use to work with a colleague who had DR Dre beats on constantly, even to the toilet. I asked him what he listens to and he replied "nothing, i'm just not interested in a conversation with anyone" 
Instead he watches cricket all day and randomly swears at times.
Instead he watches cricket all day and randomly swears at times.
People may perceive you socially awkward or inverted individual but that shouldn't define you as a person, their perceptions are insignificant and irrelevant to your life
neither impact your relationship with your family, friends and social circle
As long as you know your surroundings you may know who are true friends or not , but don't let toxic people get into your way or people with negative vibes they're always discouraging
Don't get personal keep your private life affairs to yourself
TekNiKo
Loyal To The One True Caliph (Hafidahullah)
I cut off all friends when I came back from Somalia, I just cant relate with diaspora kids anymore. I prefer chilling with odayaasha and they are always entertaining. But in Somalia I had alot of good friends female and male. I felt truly at home. Here I just go to work and come home and on the weekends read books.
It’s normal. Lots of backstabbing assholes exist on this earth so not trusting nobody is the right policy. If you tell them something deep it can be used against you in the future. Always keep to yourself.It's not normal. There is probably some underlying trauma.
Or it could just be the paranoia in our community. Our parents are always telling us to watch out for people and what they will say about us. Hard to trust people if they think they're all gonna talk shit
Laugh with many but don’t trust any.
IftiinOfLife
Raw Hard Truth
I am mostly like this at work. I don't like getting close to co-workers supervisors or managers.
Nothing wrong with enjoying your own company once in a while. You get complete control over what you want to do and when. However there is great joy that comes from spending time with and experiencing life with other people.
You shouldn't look down on others, everyone has a story to tell and perspectives and viewpoints on life you don't/haven't yet experienced. I use to be a lot like you in my late teens/early twenties but it gets boring and lonesome after a while.
IftiinOfLife
Raw Hard Truth
Life is a solo mission isn't it, when we die, we stand alone for judgement, and atoned accordingly. I think deep down all adults know this.
To expand on that, I think I'm an extroverted loner, I love people, BUT I need 15 mins a day to regroup with myself and entertain myself, by myself, for myself., to help myself.
Never show strangers your full personality, keep your true feelings hidden, protect yourselves and your futures at all costs, play the game and win
I think everyone does this to an extent , you keep a part of yourself, just for you, and show the world what you want them to see
, some things we keep between us and our qareen 
To expand on that, I think I'm an extroverted loner, I love people, BUT I need 15 mins a day to regroup with myself and entertain myself, by myself, for myself., to help myself.
Never show strangers your full personality, keep your true feelings hidden, protect yourselves and your futures at all costs, play the game and win
I think everyone does this to an extent , you keep a part of yourself, just for you, and show the world what you want them to see
, some things we keep between us and our qareen Trending
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