Having a wife back home

[Abdisamad]

Think about why you as a man want to also marry about think about why a woman would also want to marry.

Marriage is meant to safeguard you from evil. That is why a woman can divorce a man for leaving for more than 4 months or if she isn’t provided intimacy.

People are human. Not that cheating is ever acceptable, but what is the point of marriage if you only see your spouse once a year?

I wasn't looking at it at a sexual point of view, more from practical view point, like how I could provide for her and our potential kids adequately so they can have a good life and at the same time lives raise the kids in their own culture and country.. I didn't mean to neglect her or the kids.. Just looking at ways to provide for them since there are almost no well paid jobs in Somalia.

 

[Qeelbax]

You niggaz really scaring me wallahi

Bro you must be desperate to marry

 

[Lostbox]

Can you explain the logic or reasoning? Why not go wife up a local?

 

[Zkr]

That level of trust is insane a woman has some urges and who knows what she will do to be satisfied. I've heard lots of story about men who've had their wives cheat on them while they were in the West working hard

Mostly truck drivers. The things that they do are wild.

 

[Abdisamad]

Bro you must be desperate to marry

I wouldn't say desperate lol.. Just curious to know some stuff.

 

[Celery]

Good idea. Even though the people back home are not as decent as we think, keeping your kids there and funding a good private education is beneficial. There won’t be much of a romantic relationship since you’re only seeing each other once or twice a year.

 

[Abdisamad]

Can you explain the logic or reasoning? Why not go wife up a local?

Just wanted to raise my kids in our country and culture then when I get old i'll retire there InshaAllah.

 

[himber23]

Meeting Once a year is retarded, what kind of Marriage is that?

You Basically a stranger to your wife and Kids, and who knows what she's doing behind your back

 

[Duke$]

My shriek uncle had a secret wife back home mans got do what a man’s got to do

 

[The alchemist]

Do what you want, man. It's your life and choices. Don't let bums from the internet project their issues into your decisions.

Make sure your choices and handling of them are sound for your own sake and the people you want to deal with, especially as it relates to family. You should be on top of that.

Everything has a trade-off. If you can live with those and handle them and think your reasons are right, then do what you must.

If you expect to marry a woman and let her stay there, then you should expect to travel a lot and spend time several times a year for a while as well. And you should also expect to hear a lot from your family that they want to come to where you live after a while. But I think if you break it down for the woman from the get-go and ask her if she is in for that bargain, then that is an honest contract.

If you want your kids to be raised in the homeland, they can spend a considerable time in their earlier primary years there too. I think the smartest is to find a way to live in the Middle East or something. You can find yourself a decent job and live with your family in a Muslim-majority environment, and from there you can travel a lot more to the homeland. In such a way, you can avoid the trappings of the Western world.

 

[Nin123]

How is it to have a wife back in Somalia while living/working abroad.. Is it feasible to have her there and visit once or twice a year during vacations? If she lives around her family and you support her economically to afford a maid to help her with the house chores etc.. The only advantage as I see it is your kids would grow up in Somali culture and you won't have to worry about their deen etc.. Any of you have experience with this kinda setup? Please share your thoughts.. I might be going to Somalia soon InshaAllah.

Nigga she will likely cheat on you better take dna test for the kids if you have one with her.

 

[Thelegendhimself]

That level of trust is insane a woman has some urges and who knows what she will do to be satisfied. I've heard lots of story about men who've had their wives cheat on them while they were in the West working hard

That's some fake ass shit.

 

[Kalsoon]

How is it to have a wife back in Somalia while living/working abroad.. Is it feasible to have her there and visit once or twice a year during vacations? If she lives around her family and you support her economically to afford a maid to help her with the house chores etc.. The only advantage as I see it is your kids would grow up in Somali culture and you won't have to worry about their deen etc.. Any of you have experience with this kinda setup? Please share your thoughts.. I might be going to Somalia soon InshaAllah.

You would still have to worry about their diin unfortunately. Spend time back home and see how religious some of the common people are. Observe how their akhlaaq is and how strict they are when it comes to the boundaries Islam set. I feel there’s some bad personality characteristics that kids can develop by growing up there just as there are bad characteristics they can get here from imitating the people around them. See all the people on tiktok who are back in dalka. They lack any sense of shame. Similar to those who have completely assimilated with the west.

If you’re not going to be there with your kids, you won’t be able to shape their minds with good. They will pick up the habits of those around them. I would say pick your wife wisely and see how good her family is.

Your future kids deserve to have present parents who lovingly guide them and who are there with them throughout their childhood. You can’t build an extremely strong bond with them if you’re not there all the time.