I know that men and women aren't the same. Anyways that's not the rule islamically you can technically withhold for example if a guy has multiple incomes and he only tells his wife about one and provides from that one source of income there would islamically be nothing wrong with that from a providing standpoint aslong as he can uphold what she's used to and rich guys already do that when they with hold info like this when they marry poorer women. I don't have an issue with the money it's the hiding and trust that is the problem aswell as non traditional people picking and choicing when and how they want to be trad when it suitable for them. If an individual is already in a 50/50 relationship then that women is not being provided for in the first place.
Islamically he has to provide her with the lifestyle he lives. If he lives a rich lifestyle he has to provide that . We already know he doesn’t have to spend his whole paycheck on her. We’ve had discussions before about how the husbands money ain’t even technically the wife’s. He could marry another woman thus spending is other wealth on another, divorce her she won’t be entitled to nothing despite living there for years.
It's team work tho you can't do anything together if one is our of the loop. That's gen wealth on your own. I'm not really talking about the husband getting any money I'm only arguing that he needs to be aware of it.
Btw, I’m in total agreement with you. But let’s be real are Islamic marriages with regards to
finances team work? The husband can marry without her
knowledge thus splitting a woman’s children’s
generational wealth even more? The idea of your husband’s money being your own in the
context of
traditionalism is false and a lot of Muslim men seem to want to invoke sharing and working together when it suites them. A Muslim woman can literally have worked side by side with her husband for decades and looked after his assets even actually being with him when he was poor and had nothing. But
legally he can marry again once he’s established and even her a talaq despite being with him when he was struggling.
There is no legal protection and that is his right although it might not be moral depending on how you look at it.
No I'm just using the logic non traditional people already use. If you have choosen to contribute and split stuff then you can't exactly hide this sort of information and since there non traditional using Islamic arguments are basically out of the window because if he gets that sort of raise it leads to her being able to slack off and visversa. They both owe each other in that context.
It’s already sadaqa on the wife for choosing to chip in, so I don’t see how traditionalism or lack thereof has a thing to do with it. He’s already
benefiting and on top of that, you seem to be arguing that since she’s already giving him some of her money he should have more access or more info?!
You can’t say that
Islamic arguments are out of the window. Since Islamically a woman chipping in isn’t haram and she can always refuse to continue chipping in.
Scholars have said it’s her choice, so why are you trying to suggest that once a woman helps her husband she forfeits her original Islamic rights?
Do you hear yourself?
I think that yes women in 50/50 relationship do have to contribute just as much but i dont believe in 50/50 relationship so personally that's not my thing. Neither would I feel that I'm owed anything from a woman money wise.
No, because those women in 50/50 relationships can opt out anytime in an Islamic wedding contract. They’re not gaal and aren’t bound by this. Islamically a woman can choose to give her husband 50% and the next month she can withdraw it, so what now?
whatever happens happens you can't predict the future so no point going through it selfishly and making everything about yourself. Relationships are about being partners its not a solo affair. If you can't trust a man don't get married or marry someone in your socio-economic bracket.
I could use the exact same argument for Pre-nups. Are you pro or against it? Be honest. I don’t think the guys here are being honest here as most of them if they were millionaires wouldn’t trust their partner 100% and thus will try and have an ironclad contract or hide some of their assets in Switzerland or whatever island.
Plus you have autonomy just get a divorce if things go left if you get a bad reaction.
That’s the issue you’re forgetting, women who are in that situation are in a
rock and
hard place. Modern men are entitled. They believe that they should get a piece of the pie and on top of that tend to feel competitive when their wife has a massive cut. Women who have money married to men who don’t have as much have higher risks of DV. Many Men have huge complexes when the women has a substantial amount unfortunately as they start to feel it’s an attack on their masculinity.
Prenup are based on post divorce and how people feel about each other in a relationship after are very different.
Prenups are made before marriage and Id wager it’s even worse as before the union the partner is already thinking about divorce and protecting assets.
you no longer have any loyalties to each other and well Islamically neither of you have a right to each others money post divorce so its not even about trust its about preventing anything if a divorce ever happens. Plus that's basically only a thing in a few western states. You don't need a prenup living in the UAE because you can't use the justice system there to go behind your partners back.
You can’t use the Islamic argument that neither have a right to each other’s money whilst arguing that the husband has a right to know about his wife’s income. Islamically she can be a multimillionaire and can have a secret house and it would be seen as legal albeit morally grey.
A could argue that in the Gulf a wife doesn’t need to hide her money since if the husband refuses to provide she can sue him and the jurist wouldn’t care at all that she’s a millionaire whilst he only earns 60k.
Western Muslim women have no such recourse.
Therefore two can play that game when it comes to your argument.
Plus it's upfront so you can back out if based on how you feel about it. this is about hiding stuff where you aren't even given the decency to back out. It's like someone telling you they did zina and they you choose to marry them after the fact compared to someone who hides it.
A woman being a multimillionaire is no where the near the same as a woman committing Zina. Zina comes with STIs, community gossiping about your wife ect. A woman having money is nothing but a positive added bonus but many men feel entitlement and want to live off women these days. I get your point about a man feeling let down and feeling that his wife didn’t trust him ect.
