Do you still think about your first love?

[Griezmann7711]

According to her she is somali. But know her comment history she doesn’t want guidance.

Alright, so what did u mean by lol. It wasn't funny.

 

[Barni]

Alright, so what did u mean by lol. It wasn't funny.

Lol i just type lol or lmao in most of my sentences it’s just a habit. Don’t take it personally lmao.

 

[Keep it a boqol]

You’re coping. This is just infatuation. It’s time to move on

For a self proclaimed incel your very socially aware. Classclown and socializemaxxx sxb

 

[Odious Delirium]

It aint over till it's over. I just stopped talking to her cause I had to improve myself and was to shy and pussy back then. No money, morals, confidence all of that. Once I become close to the man I want to be then, I'll reintroduce myself. I'll just keep her on the back burner till the time comes and I can actually focus on this marriage ting. I just pray some other guy isn't on her mind. I do have to stop obsessing tho because I doubt my first "love" will work out. Also she could not be the person she was back then anymore.

You have to establish a foot hold and show your interested in her. Start a talking stage with marriage in mind so you guys can become exclusive. otherwise some guy is gonna come around while your busy and snatch her up but don't obsess and think with your head

 

[Griezmann7711]

Lol i just type lol or lmao in most of my sentences it’s just a habit. Don’t take it personally lmao.

Yeah I do it too, just thought it was not in a suiting situation since you were talking about her not being Muslim.

 

[Barni]

Yeah I do it too, just thought it was not in a suiting situation since you were talking about her not being Muslim.

I personally dont see it as a big deal but i will try keep that in mind next time.

 

[a_bilan]

I remember it like it was yesterday. A popular group of girls came to my table and told me that this girl liked me. I pretty much derealized because she was super cute and I didn't think anybody would like me. It was my friends cousin and I was too shy so I never pursued it and was pussy.

Then a year later I randomly remembered so we talked for a few days all platonic. My ego went up 1000% percent because a girl was intrested in me .

Then we stopped talking and I haven't talked to her in like 3 years still at the same school. She didn't lose interest but we were both to shy. I could probably talk to her again right now if I wanted to plus I'm more attractive and confident now. She's my safety girI just hope she didn't lose that spark with me.

I haven't ever talked to a girl since.

Whenever I watch dating videos, or read post about relationships I automatically think of her. Damn bro I should probably pursue her once I can focus on marriage and stuff. I want her so bad but I want to get myself together before I can talk to her seriously she deserves me at my best. I hope she isn't thinking about some other guy

What if I send her a random text like how's she doing. would she think i'm thirsty I wanna be a good muslim but I still want her to think of me??? tuff man.

this is so adorable

You’re still in grade school, you not getting married anytime soon. Get to know her, tell her you got a little crush.

 

[Xisaabta]

You have to establish a foot hold and show your interested in her. Start a talking stage with marriage in mind so you guys can become exclusive. otherwise some guy is gonna come around while your busy and snatch her up but don't obsess and think with your head

the thing is I'm far from exclusivity I probably won't even consider marriage until like 5 years. I think it's too soon to show interest again? Maybe when I start taking this marriage stuff seriously, I'll let her know. I could just be a wimp right now and nervous but that's what i'm thinking.

 

[Xisaabta]

this is so adorable

You’re still in grade school, you not getting married anytime soon. Get to know her, tell her you got a little crush.

thank you but this is terrible advice. no way will I tell her I got a crush then not do anything until I'm ready to get married. that just opens the door for our "relationship" to get ruined as we will get too close too soon. I'll just take my time and let her know once I'm serious about this all. Patience is key.

 

[a_bilan]

thank you but this is terrible advice. no way will I tell her I got a crush then not do anything until I'm ready to get married. that just opens the door for our "relationship" to get ruined as we will get too close too soon. I'll just take my time and let her know once I'm serious about this all. Patience is key.

sounds like you already have a plan. Inshallah it works out

 

[Xisaabta]

sounds like you already have a plan. Inshallah it works out

ameen ameen

 

[Dualke]

I remember it like it was yesterday. A popular group of girls came to my table and told me that this girl liked me. I pretty much derealized because she was super cute and I didn't think anybody would like me. It was my friends cousin and I was too shy so I never pursued it and was pussy.

Then a year later I randomly remembered so we talked for a few days all platonic. My ego went up 1000% percent because a girl was intrested in me .

Then we stopped talking and I haven't talked to her in like 3 years still at the same school. She didn't lose interest but we were both to shy. I could probably talk to her again right now if I wanted to plus I'm more attractive and confident now. She's my safety girI just hope she didn't lose that spark with me.

I haven't ever talked to a girl since.

Whenever I watch dating videos, or read post about relationships I automatically think of her. Damn bro I should probably pursue her once I can focus on marriage and stuff. I want her so bad but I want to get myself together before I can talk to her seriously she deserves me at my best. I hope she isn't thinking about some other guy

What if I send her a random text like how's she doing. would she think i'm thirsty I wanna be a good muslim but I still want her to think of me??? tuff man.

3 years is a long time lmao. You have at least kept in contact with her occasionally before confessing your feelings. How do you know if she even remembers your existence?

 

[Yaraye]

I remember it like it was yesterday. A popular group of girls came to my table and told me that this girl liked me. I pretty much derealized because she was super cute and I didn't think anybody would like me. It was my friends cousin and I was too shy so I never pursued it and was pussy.

Then a year later I randomly remembered so we talked for a few days all platonic. My ego went up 1000% percent because a girl was intrested in me .

Then we stopped talking and I haven't talked to her in like 3 years still at the same school. She didn't lose interest but we were both to shy. I could probably talk to her again right now if I wanted to plus I'm more attractive and confident now. She's my safety girI just hope she didn't lose that spark with me.

I haven't ever talked to a girl since.

Whenever I watch dating videos, or read post about relationships I automatically think of her. Damn bro I should probably pursue her once I can focus on marriage and stuff. I want her so bad but I want to get myself together before I can talk to her seriously she deserves me at my best. I hope she isn't thinking about some other guy

What if I send her a random text like how's she doing. would she think i'm thirsty I wanna be a good muslim but I still want her to think of me??? tuff man.

keep in contact if you want her to think of you. You can't be uninvolved in her orbit. Plus for the sake of god, express interest. She can't read your mind, and might just end up with someone else

 

[Xisaabta]

keep in contact if you want her to think of you. You can't be uninvolved in her orbit. Plus for the sake of god, express interest. She can't read your mind, and might just end up with someone else

if she ain't a telepath then i don't want her .


just joking about it good advice. imma make some dua for a few days then bring the confidence. . when i get rejected i will blame all of you guys expeditiously. @Dualke @a_bilan @Javelin

 

[Xisaabta]

UPDATE:

So today at Jumca I prayed for allah to give me confidence.

Then randomly today I seen a good looking (i tried lowering my gaze but I'll just be honest) somali neighbor who lives right next to me who's conveniently my age. I helped her out with somethings. Nothing haram purely platonic. Should I take this as a sign and move on from the old girl that I haven't talked in 3 years?

I read somewhere that one of the biggest problems in dating is people want monagamous relationships but date polyamoursly. Meaning they go on multiple dates with different active potential suitors. This causes problems as it leads to let's say the man wants more and the grass is greener on the other side complex.

This makes me only want to take one of those 2 girls seriously at the time and completely neglect the other one. For the sake of allah and our potentially future relationship.

The problem is though I don't if my neighbor likes me, she was smiling a whole lot during out encounters but I could be reaching. Nevertheless the 3 years ago girl could've forgot about me too so I guess I'm at ground zero for both.

I'm leaning towards the neighbor it could be recency bias but it could also be I'm scared of talking to the 3 years girl because DM's are a hard thing to navigate. I also got decent rapore with my neighbors.

On another note I should probably chill with this dating stuff because I don't even want to get married anytime soon. Im thinking like this cause I don't want these cute girls to find some other farax in the meantime. But I also don't want to have a haram relationship without the focus of marriage in mind and just stalling and wasting their time. So far I've been a good muslim lad I don't wanna change that.

I think it's best if I quit for now. Luckily I aint do anything dumb yet.

 

[Yaraye]

UPDATE:

So today at Jumca I prayed for allah to give me confidence.

Then randomly today I seen a good looking (i tried lowering my gaze but I'll just be honest) somali neighbor who lives right next to me who's conveniently my age. I helped her out with somethings. Nothing haram purely platonic. Should I take this as a sign and move on from the old girl that I haven't talked in 3 years?

I read somewhere that one of the biggest problems in dating is people want monagamous relationships but date polyamoursly. Meaning they go on multiple dates with different active potential suitors. This causes problems as it leads to let's say the man wants more and the grass is greener on the other side complex.

This makes me only want to take one of those 2 girls seriously at the time and completely neglect the other one. For the sake of allah and our potentially future relationship.

The problem is though I don't if my neighbor likes me, she was smiling a whole lot during out encounters but I could be reaching. Nevertheless the 3 years ago girl could've forgot about me too so I guess I'm at ground zero for both.

I'm leaning towards the neighbor it could be recency bias but it could also be I'm scared of talking to the 3 years girl because DM's are a hard thing to navigate. I also got decent rapore with my neighbors.

On another note I should probably chill with this dating stuff because I don't even want to get married anytime soon. Im thinking like this cause I don't want these cute girls to find some other farax in the meantime. But I also don't want to have a haram relationship without the focus of marriage in mind and just stalling and wasting their time. So far I've been a good muslim lad I don't wanna change that.

I think it's best if I quit for now. Luckily I aint do anything dumb yet.

yes quit. You talked so much about how you liked old girl, and forgot all about the old girl the moment your pretty neighbor showed you a couple of smiles

if you don't have marriage in mind anytime soon, don't waste these girls times.

 

[Xisaabta]

yes quit. You talked so much about how you liked old girl, and forgot all about the old girl the moment your pretty neighbor showed you a couple of smiles

if you don't have marriage in mind anytime soon, don't waste these girls times.

when you put it like that i seem very shallow. but for context me and the old girl were really not even serious we just talked a bit in school and i liked her but quit talking to her because i was scared back then and didn't want it to turn haraam (not the best reasoning i know it was 3 years ago). the most we talked about was like our school grades or something. . me liking this new neighbor isn't as bad as it looks. especially cuz it's been 3 years.

forget all this annoying dating tings imma just hit the gym and pump out my "emotions". i'm getting a headache from this. i'll quit this all until like 4 or 5 years. i aint tryna wast their time like u said.

 

[Yaraye]

when you put it like that i seem very shallow. but for context me and the old girl were really not even serious we just talked a bit in school and i liked her but quit talking to her because i was scared back then and didn't want it to turn haraam (not the best reasoning i know it was 3 years ago). the most we talked about was like our school grades or something. . me liking this new neighbor isn't as bad as it looks. especially cuz it's been 3 years.

forget all this annoying dating tings imma just hit the gym and pump out my "emotions". i'm getting a headache from this. i'll quit this all until like 4 or 5 years. i aint tryna wast their time like u said.

how old are you anyway?

 

[Odious Delirium]

when you put it like that i seem very shallow. but for context me and the old girl were really not even serious we just talked a bit in school and i liked her but quit talking to her because i was scared back then and didn't want it to turn haraam (not the best reasoning i know it was 3 years ago). the most we talked about was like our school grades or something. . me liking this new neighbor isn't as bad as it looks. especially cuz it's been 3 years.

forget all this annoying dating tings imma just hit the gym and pump out my "emotions". i'm getting a headache from this. i'll quit this all until like 4 or 5 years. i aint tryna wast their time like u said.

So you where just infatuated.

I would say just forget about them and focus on your own self until your ready or near ready and keep it halal. If there still available then persue one of them if not there are plenty of fish in the sea.

 

[Xisaabta]

how old are you anyway?

imma just say I'm in my first few years of college. 18-20 give or take.