Do you ask the person's qabiil when you are getting to know someone romantically?

[inacabdillahi]

I feel like many try to ask indirectly but it’s obvious that they want to know my qabiil. Why is that?

 

[Dualke]

I ask them outright.

 

[inacabdillahi]

I ask them outright.

I don’t really care about qabiil.

 

[Sol]

I don't think I've ever asked someone irl what their qabiil is

 

[Odious Delirium]

I don't care about qabil but I ask just in case they care about it or if it may be a problem from there side and just in general to know more about there background

 

[Aurelian]

For my entire life surrounded by somalis, I only dared once to ask someone qabiil. But I think that question will eventually come up.

 

[inacabdillahi]

For my entire life surrounded by somalis, I only dared once to ask someone qabiil. But I think that question will eventually come up.

I’ve noticed that people don’t ask qabiil but they’ll ask what region my family comes from etc.

 

[inacabdillahi]

I ask them outright.

Why?

 

[Abdisamad]

Nope but they usually ask me.. Found out xalimos are very qabiil conscious

 

[Odious Delirium]

Nope but they usually ask me.. Found out xalimos are very qabiil conscious

Yeah they will most likely be the ones asking

 

[Keep it a boqol]

Nope but they usually ask me.. Found out xalimos are very qabiil conscious

Lmaoooooo so true espcially the diaspora born ones they’re so sneaky with it.

 

[Keep it a boqol]

Yea I think it’s normal sometimes It comes up when you ask them about their life and family background.

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[Qofwalan]

i don’t usually ask

 

[Wervelwind]

Yea I think it’s normal sometimes It comes up when you ask them about their life and family background.

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Does she not like her dad?

 

[Keep it a boqol]

Does she not like her dad?

Her aabo was repping Puntland he would say “why don’t you also wear the Puntland flag”

 

[GaradShabeel]

Some of y’all are amateurs here

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[A Mean Guy]

Tell them to pull their sleeves up and check what flag is on their hand

 

[inacabdillahi]

Some of y’all are amateurs here

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What if they say they’re from xamar ? You can’t really know their qabiil just based on that.

 

[GaradShabeel]

What if they say they’re from xamar ? You can’t really know their qabiil just based on that.

True, but with a quick inquiry, you can find out more.

A lot of people have moved to Xamar post-90s. You just ask them how many generations their family have lived there or if they have ties to other regions outside of Benadir.

Even if you don’t end up knowing their sub-clan; their clan is the bare minimum that can easily be found out.

 

[Rationale]

If you have to ask directly, you are an amateur. And shouldn't discuss qabiil.