Am I racist?

[Periplus]

I find women with short hair masculine and I can’t find them attractive it’s a big turn off for me, am I not allowed to reject someone I don’t find attractive? Wdym it can change in a few months? Why don’t you go and marry a fat woman she can lose weight in a few months too.

You can ask them to grow it out. It takes minimal effort on their part.

Secondly, comparing weight and hair length is disingenuous.

One requires minimal effort and the other requires discipline, mental fortitude and good/average genetics.

Regardless, it’s not the end of the world if your partner isn’t skinny.

 

[Periplus]

Behaviours are grounded on an individual's beliefs you simply can’t detach the 2. Those who become muslim do have to change their behaviours which they were accustomed to but weren't in line with that islam says.

They not only change old behaviour but also adopt new ones after becoming a muslim. Islam is a practical religion involving a person's lifestyle it's not simply about mere attestation of doctrinal beliefs.

They're better men as a result of accepting islam and this made them have better mannerisms etc.

You're a man and you can approach naag gaal ah like christian for marriage but a muslim woman can not the guy has to be a muslim before any sort of conversation takes place. If a kafir man approaches a muslim woman then she should inform him that she's can't marry him. Laakin unfortunately the story doesn't end there as they form relationship, date etc rarely does it end well.

Muslims are normalising this culture of dating kafir, having sex with them etc but for the vast majority it doesn't lead to anything stable. For muslim women it's even worse as they've the extra burden of trying to get the guy to convert.

Yes, I agree that behaviour and beliefs are intertwined.

I just believe that it’s easier to change the belief first then attempting to change the behaviour first.

This is because belief is the father of behaviour. If you change your belief, you change your behaviour.

When someone has opened their eyes to a different religion, suddenly changing your habits is nothing in comparison.

 

[Xoxoxo]

Why is it texturism and not self-love? It doesn't have to be a negative thing to ONLY like your looks.
For example, if a dark skinned man only likes dark skinned women and turns down a light skinned woman because of her skin-tone, should we call this 'colourism'?

It's odd in my opinion, to try to label natural inclinations as being discriminatory.

Because hating on it and saying that you don’t want someone just because of their hair type is wrong. You’re literally calling Allah creation unmanageable. She could have said that she didn’t want him because he’s not religious, a bad guy and a culture clash. But his hair? That’s why she didn’t want him? Religion should be first. After that his personality and the culture clash. not wanting someone because you think your children will inherit that hair and it will be “unmanageable”. There’s smt called YouTube and google and if you’re even that lazy you can let your child go to the salon.

somalis don’t even have timo jileec on average, most Somalis have dagax hair. Hair that’s dry and that is wide. all of your children won’t get timo jileec hair just because you have it. My mom has timo jileec hair and I am the only one out of her 4 children who got it. All of my other siblings got type 3c-4b hair. With me being the exception and having 2b/2c hair aka only wavy hair.

 

[Xoxoxo]

Not Muslim should be number 1 in my opinion.

THATS what I also was shocked about? His hair is a main issue??? No sis hun being not Muslim is an issue

 

[kulane]

Ask me questions, I want to know if I’m a racist.

Today a somali girl asked me why I wouldn’t date this jamaican dude that was hitting on me, I said I want to preserve my jileec hair genes. She’s now declared i’m a racist. I asked her if it’s wrong for a madhow to say they won’t marry an east asian because they want to preserve their athleticism, she said not really.

why am I a racist for preserving my cushitic genes? Ask me questions. I’m not taking these bootyclapping xalimos and their advice serious

This didn't happen. You made all this up. Stop lying

 

[Angelina]

Yes but you do understand that race is not an acceptable reason to refuse marriage in Islam?

That’s the whole point.

If you don’t like them for any reason that’s cool. But if the only reason you’re not considering them relates to where they come from, then that ain’t cool.

That’s not guilting.

I don't know about that. Islam does take into account personal preferences and scholars have also mentioned the Urf of marriage. Obviously religion and character comes first, but taking into account a person's background is completely fine.

 

[Bundasliga]

It isn’t.

But refusing to consider others is.

You see the difference?

No, it's still not.
Stop this mental gymnastics for madow people smh

 

[Periplus]

Stop this mental gymnastics for madow people smh

Find a Hadith that states otherwise.

There numerous Hadith of the prophet PBUH admonishing people for refusing to marry Blacks.

 

[Periplus]

I don't know about that. Islam does take into account personal preferences and scholars have also mentioned the Urf of marriage. Obviously religion and character comes first, but taking into account a person's background is completely fine.

Background is different from race.

During the prophets time PBUH, lineage generally determined your position in life.

If your father was an executioner, you would become one also.

However, race is different.

 

[Nilotic]

I really don't think that Horn African women should ever date or marry Nilotic and Niger-Congo men -- and it's not racist to have an ideal phenotype -- preferably your own.

 

[Nilotic]

It isn’t.

But refusing to consider others is.

You see the difference?

I honestly don't regard myself as racist for excluding everyone but my own people when I think of a girlfriend or a wife.

 

[Periplus]

I honestly don't regard myself as racist for excluding everyone but my own people when I think of a girlfriend or a wife.

You misunderstand me bro.

What I mean is that if you reject the best person in the world for you, that you get along with perfectly etc because of their race.

If the race is the only thing that is keeping you from marrying a specific person.

 

[Shimbiris]

Not picking any particular side but @Periplus is undeniably correct about the Islamic position on such matters. Islam, at it's core, is very anti racism and tribalism, even if Arabs and many other Muslims tend to embody the opposite of this in their culture. The prophet (SAW) would indeed not be impressed with someone rejecting another person for anything other than qualities like their character, quality and piety. Whatever side of the fence you are personally on, Periplus is just being factual and not "SJW" in pointing that out.

 

[Periplus]

Not picking any particular side but @Periplus is undeniably correct about the Islamic position on such matters. Islam, at it's core, is very anti racism and tribalism, even if Arabs and many other Muslims tend to embody the opposite of this in their culture. The prophet (SAW) would indeed not be impressed with someone rejecting another person for anything other than qualities like their character, quality and piety. Whatever side of the fence you are personally on, Periplus is just being factual and not "SJW" in pointing that out.

Thank you bro.

The amount of Hadith of the prophet PBUH literally pointing this out is immense.

I don’t know why something so simple is being debated with such ferocity.

 

[Bundasliga]

Find a Hadith that states otherwise.

There numerous Hadith of the prophet PBUH admonishing people for refusing to marry Blacks.

Go marry a black man yourself then .
Instead of begging it to people who doesnt want you anyway, advice black people to marry black people & all problems are gone. Have some pride.

 

[Periplus]

Go marry a black man yourself then .
Instead of begging it to people who doesnt want you anyway, advice black people to marry black people & all problems are gone. Have some pride.

Dude if you’re a Muslim, I hardly see why you’re disagreeing with me.

Was our prophet PBUH wrong for urging Arab families to let Black men marry their daughters?

 

[Bundasliga]

Dude if you’re a Muslim, I hardly see why you’re disagreeing with me.

Was our prophet PBUH wrong for urging Arab families to let Black men marry their daughters?

No he wasn't. If the prophet himself choose your spouse you have to accept

But would you still pursue a marriage when the family doesn't want you & outcast their daughter, because of you ?
& there is always there is always the chance of divorce . So she has no family support anymore.

All this can be avoided if you go where you are appreciated.

 

[Lebron James]

Dude if you’re a Muslim, I hardly see why you’re disagreeing with me.

Was our prophet PBUH wrong for urging Arab families to let Black men marry their daughters?

We aren’t living in the times of our prophet I see what you’re saying but the world doesn’t work like that anymore, people want to keep their lineage going. If you promote mixing you will end up like Brazil

 

[AdoonkaAlle]

Yes, I agree that behaviour and beliefs are intertwined.

I just believe that it’s easier to change the belief first then attempting to change the behaviour first.

This is because belief is the father of behaviour. If you change your belief, you change your behaviour.

When someone has opened their eyes to a different religion, suddenly changing your habits is nothing in comparison.

Sxb do you even read what you write at all ?

You were arguing with me that it's easier to change belief than behaviour, stating that an ciyaal suuq, self haters rarely change because according to you it's easier to change their belief than behaviour.

Now you go on ahead to claim that the foundation of behaviour is belief and if you change your belief you can change your behaviour. Do you realise your contradiction in these 2 statements of yours ?

How many reformed racists or ciyaal suuq have you met compared to converts?

People will find it harder to change their character traits than their beliefs. Because beliefs can change with knowledge and behaviour can’t.

It’s that simple.

Now that we’ve cleared that up. Go find a Hadith that allows race to be a disqualifying factor in a suitor.

@AdoonkaAlle

The reason I brought up converts is to highlight that people will find it easier to change their beliefs than behaviour.

It’s easier for someone to become Muslim than to dump unsavoury habits. Because one is tied in knowledge and the other is tied in denial/ignorance etc.

If what determines change in behaviour is belief , how is it then possible to claim that it's easier to change your belief than your behaviour ? sxb you're all over the place contradicting yourself in almost every post you make. Instead of retracting your unislamic views and admitting you're were completely wrong you instead choose to engage in mental gymnastics

Since behaviours are dependent on belief according to you now, why in the world did you make an exception for the religious compatibility between a kafir and a muslim woman ? Like i stated before there's something very odd about your views and how you keep on jumping between islam and secular liberalism

If the islamic prohibition of kafir men pursuing any sort of relationship with muslim women doesn't matter to you, why do you then try to use islam to back up your claim of lineage compatibility being haram ?

You wouldn't entertain ciyaal suuq for your female relatives but will allow them to pursue relationships with kafir men in the hopes that they somehow convert to islam ?


May Allah guide you if you're indeed a muslim as what you espouse here in this thread can't be justified under any islamic reasoning at all.

 

[Periplus]

But would you still pursue a marriage when the family doesn't want you & outcast their daughter, because of you ?
& there is always there is always the chance of divorce . So she has no family support anymore.

All this can be avoided if you go where you are appreciated.

The Hadith I mentioned related to a family that rejected a man for their daughter because he was Black.

The prophet PBUH admonished the family because they didn’t consider his character or righteousness.

One could’ve said that the prophet PBUH could’ve married him where he was appreciated.

But the reason that happened was to be an example for us today. To settle this argument, ironically.