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Why I’m Still Single

Tukraq

VIP
you can get the perfect man if your the perfect women and vice versa, aka its not settling just dating on your level, a lot of women really overestimate thier standing and think that things like being educated and careerwomen are positives when in reality they add no added attraction to the other sex(middle school dropout and phd women have the same level to a guy dating wise), when it comes to dating/marring for a women your value will be more placed on looks and personality so thats where you should be ranking yourself, men on the other hand are more judged on status and wealth which is where they should put more value on, a top tier status/money man will have loads of perfect partner options the vice versa for women isnt however high status wealthy women because men wont put value in that but however the highly attractive 10/10/perfect personality women who can attract hundreds of prince charmings
 

RedStar

The Bad Ali of Jigjiga
VIP
Many Somali girls don’t date(halal dating ofc), don’t socialise with the opposite sex, don’t move past childish social media ‘relationships’ yet they expect to meet someone that meets their requirements.

Often they just complain like this girl, but they seldom ask themselves if they go to the right venues to go look for a future husband. The girl in the video gave it all away when she said “men don’t like outspoken and confident women like myself”. Nah mate, the men YOU meet are like that so maybe switch it up?

If she was really happy being single at 28, then she wouldn’t have made this long video to explain herself. You gotta put yourself out there, in the right places, to attract the guys that will meet your requirements.
 
Many Somali girls don’t date(halal dating ofc), don’t socialise with the opposite sex, don’t move past childish social media ‘relationships’ yet they expect to meet someone that meets their requirements.

Often they just complain like this girl, but they seldom ask themselves if they go to the right venues to go look for a future husband. The girl in the video gave it all away when she said “men don’t like outspoken and confident women like myself”. Nah mate, the men YOU meet are like that so maybe switch it up?

If she was really happy being single at 28, then she wouldn’t have made this long video to explain herself. You gotta put yourself out there, in the right places, to attract the guys that will meet your requirements.
Agree, but its calaf at the end of the day. As a man, where do you think would be good places for women to find a potential husband?
 

VixR

Veritas
Let's start with the biggest issue that comes from her video. It is a lack of self awareness about her own self. The biggest issue why people are not able to move forward in life whether it is careers, money, relationship etc is lack of self reflection. The inability to look at one self and think what could i do better to make or improve myself so that i can reach my goals in life.

She describes herself as bossy independent, loud etc etc in a sort of admiring way. Somewhere down the line someone or something or her brain told her that this traits are to be admired and magnified.

Now here comes the deal. These traits are good in certain situations. In say a line of work like the medical field where lives are at stake, you cannot be hesitant, unsure. You have to be sure and firm footed. people doctors nurses patients all need a person to take control and lead them. However even then if you have to be very empathetic sensitive and understand people. And not rough shod on them

But being bossy to your significant other is something else. This trait in my opinion is very unattractive to most males. A man by definition whether he is a high getter or just the average man all desire a woman who surrenders to him, not tells him off like his mother, bosses him around or just loud 24/7

Unfortunately alot of women bring that go go in your face attitude to their personal lives and wonder why men are not receptive.

Secondly look at her. As in look at her. She is what i would call an average xalimo. Not ugly but not that great either. Now if you are not that great in looks department you need to be able to compensate in other ways. Either a great vibrant warm personality that lets men be themselves and feel attracted to you.

Or a social status/wealth that inherently attracts men to those parameters. But putting videos on youtube does not afford you a social status unless you have a million subscribers.And I don't know about her wealth but i don't think she has a career in a STEM subject. From what i can see. So i would be interested in her career aspirations at her age. Because by her age you should be having well endowed career or career goal. Or a buisness.

In any case i can only speak for myself. I have got a highly rewarding career, good pay good job prospects for promotions. I have everything i need. I am also alhamdulliah religious, pray regularly fast, go to the masjid etc etc. I grew up in a single parent household so my mom who raised me means the world to me. I look after her, my relatives and also people back home in somalia.
So i thank Allah that he has blessed me with everything he has given me. And i can tell you judging by what i saw on the video, she would not be in my radar and i suspect 90% of decent farahs as well. The sort of farah who is doing well in life and looking after his interests.
I mean, it just seems like you made up a caricature for her, and then attacked it.

She doesn’t come across as someone who has a bad attitude at all.
 

RedStar

The Bad Ali of Jigjiga
VIP
Agree, but its calaf at the end of the day. As a man, where do you think would be good places for women to find a potential husband?
That’s right, but some women say it’s calaf and hope the man of their dreams will come knocking on their door without lifting a finger.

Whether you’re looking for a spouse or a friend, it’s always good to expand your network. I’d say attend as many gala/networking events as possible, do some volunteering work within your community and etc. You’re bound to find likeminded guys. If you don’t find a few potentials, I’m sure you’ll find some good friends along the way. Win-win situation either way.
 
That’s right, but some women say it’s calaf and hope the man of their dreams will come knocking on their door without lifting a finger.

Whether you’re looking for a spouse or a friend, it’s always good to expand your network. I’d say attend as many gala/networking events as possible, do some volunteering work within your community and etc. You’re bound to find likeminded guys. If you don’t find a few potentials, I’m sure you’ll find some good friends along the way. Win-win situation either way.
This girl does go out, date and do everything. Sometimes you just dont meet the right person. But she is just 28 not 58.....so she has time. Calaf is real thing. The fact that she made video tella me she is ready and how more further can you go than tell the whole world on Youtube im sibgle and looking for partner. She did her bit imo. She is cute but too smart for my liking
 
That’s right, but some women say it’s calaf and hope the man of their dreams will come knocking on their door without lifting a finger.

Whether you’re looking for a spouse or a friend, it’s always good to expand your network. I’d say attend as many gala/networking events as possible, do some volunteering work within your community and etc. You’re bound to find likeminded guys. If you don’t find a few potentials, I’m sure you’ll find some good friends along the way. Win-win situation either way.
Thanks for your insightful response. I agree with this notion and think many should heed your advice.

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VixR

Veritas
Thanks for your insightful response. I agree with this notion and think many should heed your advice.

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This girl does go out, date and do everything. Sometimes you just dont meet the right person. But she is just 28 not 58.....so she has time. Calaf is real thing. The fact that she made video tella me she is ready and how more further can you go than tell the whole world on Youtube im sibgle and looking for partner. She did her bit imo. She is cute but too smart for my liking
You want a dumb wife?:icon lol:

You’re the guy she was talking about lol. Too many of you out there.
 
I was going to mention this. You were supposed rebel and talk to guys anyway, like the rest of us.

I’ve noticed Somali parents go from forbidding talking to guys to asking when you’re getting married.
Doing that now, I actually edit my last response. LOOL, but thank goodness, im still young so I learned from my mistakes!
 

RedStar

The Bad Ali of Jigjiga
VIP
This girl does go out, date and do everything. Sometimes you just dont meet the right person. But she is just 28 not 58.....so she has time. Calaf is real thing. The fact that she made video tella me she is ready and how more further can you go than tell the whole world on Youtube im sibgle and looking for partner. She did her bit imo. She is cute but too smart for my liking
Well she has more chance of meeting her future husband doing what she does now, than just give up. Good luck to her, I’m sure she’ll find many suitors in the near future.

What do you mean with she’s too smart for your liking? :gucciwhat:
 
Best of luck, sis. I wish nothing but the best for you.
Thank you sis. I feel like I'm a late bloomer, but I try to not let it get the best of me. I was extremely studious in undergrad, and blossomed later on. But from what I hear, don't think I've missed out on too much; that FOMO still bothers me though.
 

VixR

Veritas
Well she has more chance of meeting her future husband doing what she does now, than just give up. Good luck to her, I’m sure she’ll find many suitors in the near future.

What do you mean with she’s too smart for your liking? :gucciwhat:
The only reason a guy would say they want a dumb wife, is they want someone they can fuck over. It’s the same reason PUAs target really immature girls. They know they’re not secure in themselves yet and don’t know their worth.
 

RedStar

The Bad Ali of Jigjiga
VIP
Thanks for your insightful response. I agree with this notion and think many should heed your advice.

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It’s crazy how our parents never used to be like this. My parents have told me many stories from when they were young and single. They didn’t have these sort of restrictions put on them back then.
 
The only reason a guy would say they want a dumb wife, is they want someone they can fuck over. It’s the same reason PUAs target really immature girls. They know they’re not secure in themselves yet and don’t know their worth.
You daaamn right. But every woman can be messed about. Look at nicki minaj. Went from strong badass to the man she is willing to risk it all.


Well she has more chance of meeting her future husband doing what she does now, than just give up. Good luck to her, I’m sure she’ll find many suitors in the near future.

What do you mean with she’s too smart for your liking? :gucciwhat:
Smart girls are boring and miserable
 

RedStar

The Bad Ali of Jigjiga
VIP
The only reason a guy would say they want a dumb wife, is they want someone they can fuck over.
Let’s see what he has to say lol.

He’s in the same category as men who say their wife can’t earn more than them.
 
It’s crazy how our parents never used to be like this. My parents have told me many stories from when they were young and single. They didn’t have these sort of restrictions put on them back then.
It ain't fair at all, which is why I no longer listen or talk to them about that stuff LMAO. When Im ready to introduce them to someone is when imma let them know wassup.

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VixR

Veritas
You daaamn right. But every woman can be messed about. Look at nicki minaj. Went from strong badass to the man she is willing to risk it all.




Smart girls are boring and miserable
Nope.

I’m just going to say GL to the people in your life. That can never be me.
 

RedStar

The Bad Ali of Jigjiga
VIP
It ain't fair at all, which is why I no longer listen or talk to them about that stuff LMAO. When Im ready to introduce them to someone is when imma let them know wassup.

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Sometimes parents do give a good advice when it comes to this topic. Perhaps, you should talk to them first :nvjpqts:
 

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