Why are so many people so anti family these days?

[empressjamila]

I understand we’re in an era with a high cost of living but damn..people really make you seem like an idiot for wanting to get married and stay home with your kids.

Chasing a career has never really appealed to me. Like yea, it’s a necessity in this day and age and I’ll most likely still work part time on the side but I’m not gonna forgo creating a family to chase a career that dgaf about me.

I was talking about this to my friend the other day (who is in grad school right now) and she was like “wtf? Why do you wanna just pop out kids and stay home that’s so boring. Go back to school, get a better job and level yourself up”

Ive experienced similar sentiments from others. Even my hooyo wants me to go to grad school before I consider marriage and it’s like why? I make 80K a year as a nurse already and will make even more as I continue to get raises. I don’t care about furthering my education. Lemme just marry a good guy with financial stability who will let me stay home and take care of my babies. Is that so wrong? Lol

 

[GeeljireGenius]

Masha Allah

 

[AbrahamFreedom]

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[attash]

I was talking about this to my friend the other day (who is in grad school right now) and she was like “wtf? Why do you wanna just pop out kids and stay home that’s so boring. Go back to school, get a better job and level yourself up”

I understand people feeling this way if they had exciting careers, but how is working in a hospital and taking care of sick strangers less boring than staying at home and taking care of your own children?

 

[techsamatar]

 

[AbrahamFreedom]

I understand people feeling this way if they had exciting careers, but how is working in a hospital and taking care of sick strangers more exciting than staying at home and taking care of your own children?

Health care is toxic, especially if you're a nurse or a patient having to deal a nurse. Health care workers, but especially nurses, can be very mean, cliquey, and vindictive people.

 

[Lightshow]

Having a family is too difficult for most sadly.

 

[empressjamila]

I understand people feeling this way if they had exciting careers, but how is working in a hospital and taking care of sick strangers less boring than staying at home and taking care of your own children?

Exactly I would rather stay home and take care of my own blood and my man than some ungrateful old demented racist cadaan b*tch throwing racial slurs at me like we’re still in 1950’s Jim Crow era. Sorry not sorry

 

[empressjamila]

Health care is toxic, especially if you're a nurse or a patient having to deal a nurse. Health care workers, but especially nurses, can be very mean, cliquey, and vindictive people.

Yep I understand why so many nurses are hateful and miserable. Dealing with rude patients, family members, coworkers, and doctors is bound to make you bitter eventually

 

[Lightshow]

In my opinion, people are a lot more selfish and also afraid for the future. Modern society does not instill much hope for the future nor does it create cohesiveness.

 

[techsamatar]

Yep I understand why so many nurses are hateful and miserable. Dealing with rude patients, family members, coworkers, and doctors is bound to make you bitter eventually. I’m trying to escape before I end up like them

My sister used to work as a nurse before transitioning into the role of a full-time housewife. She's got a dedicated and industrious partner, Farah, who not only provides but also upholds his religious beliefs. For a good few years, she played the role of our "Hoyo 2.0," taking charge of raising most of my siblings. She was not just the heart of our home but also the culinary maestro, effortlessly creating any dish imaginable for family gatherings or guests. Her cooking skills are so renowned that even my non-Somali sister-in-law places weekly orders with her.

So, the short story is all about taking advantage of your youth and beauty. My sister wasn't really into education, but she knew she had certain qualities that just made her stand out – she's incredibly beautiful, ticking all the beauty standards in pretty much every community. Plus, she's a fantastic cook. At that point, it felt like she deserved a life without work. But, you know, she's got those skills from her past jobs, so she can always help out if her husband ever needs a hand.

And here's a final piece of advice: make sure you choose the right partner, your own 'Farah.' For every bad one, there are 20 good ones out there. But don't let Western expectations and feminism cloud your judgment. My sister could have easily attracted men with ten or even twenty times the wealth and better physical traits than her husband. Yet, what mattered to her was finding someone to grow old with, a future father to her kids, someone with cultural values, a strong work ethic, and other qualities in line with the Sunnah.

 

[Hmohamed54]

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That aint a stay at home wife. Thats a freeloader.

 

[Hodan from HR]

One thing I don't like is the rhetoric of what happens in the case of divorce. The same way a man can leave you, a boss can fire you. Having your children is worth the risk if motherhood is your calling. Both lifestyles have advantages and disadvantages.

True feminism is a woman choosing the lifestyle she wants for herself..

 

[World]

So what are u gna do in your free time? Any hobbies? Any side hustle you can do from your home or online? Any skill you want to learn from home?

Why not have a work from home job ?

 

[Ghengis Kaarhis]

I actually just spoke with a financially stable, "good man" yesterday who regrets getting married to a lazy, stay at home wife who does nothing for him. She's always on TikTok and Instagram. He plans to divorce her for not managing the home or cooking for him. He has to do it himself. I don't blame people being anti-marriage now. The quality of spouses is trash today.

I hope they don't have any children


There's a really good friend of mine, a Somali guy, he's an accountant and runs his own company. The man has been doing GREAT, and financially he's probably doing the best amongst our group of friends. He got married about 4 years ago, divorced within less than a two years. He goes back and forth between Alberta and Ontario every 3 weeks to spend time with his daughter, and planning to move permanently closer to his daughter as she starts school in a few years.
If he didn't work out for him, and literally got him significant amount of grey hair in his beard, what kind of chance a reformed saqajaan like myself has?!?1



mind you the straw that broke the camels back was an argument about furniture.....

 

[Khaem]

I hope they don't have any children


There's a really good friend of mine, a Somali guy, he's an accountant and runs his own company. The man has been doing GREAT, and financially he's probably doing the best amongst our group of friends. He got married about 4 years ago, divorced within less than a two years. He goes back and forth between Alberta and Ontario every 3 weeks to spend time with his daughter, and planning to move permanently closer to his daughter as she starts school in a few years.
If he didn't work out for him, and literally got him significant amount of grey hair in his beard, what kind of chance a reformed saqajaan like myself has?!?1



mind you the straw that broke the camels back was an argument about furniture.....

It's over for me

 

[AbrahamFreedom]

I hope they don't have any children


There's a really good friend of mine, a Somali guy, he's an accountant and runs his own company. The man has been doing GREAT, and financially he's probably doing the best amongst our group of friends. He got married about 4 years ago, divorced within less than a two years. He goes back and forth between Alberta and Ontario every 3 weeks to spend time with his daughter, and planning to move permanently closer to his daughter as she starts school in a few years.
If he didn't work out for him, and literally got him significant amount of grey hair in his beard, what kind of chance a reformed saqajaan like myself has?!?1



mind you the straw that broke the camels back was an argument about furniture.....

They don't have kids.

It can work out for you. You'll just have to vet for 2-3 years first. There will be a rare diamond in the pile of shit that is the Somali single pool.

 

[KillStreakIsCool]

I hope they don't have any children


There's a really good friend of mine, a Somali guy, he's an accountant and runs his own company. The man has been doing GREAT, and financially he's probably doing the best amongst our group of friends. He got married about 4 years ago, divorced within less than a two years. He goes back and forth between Alberta and Ontario every 3 weeks to spend time with his daughter, and planning to move permanently closer to his daughter as she starts school in a few years.
If he didn't work out for him, and literally got him significant amount of grey hair in his beard, what kind of chance a reformed saqajaan like myself has?!?1



mind you the straw that broke the camels back was an argument about furniture.....

What about the furniture? Was it the price or the type? Normally, Somali males don’t have an interest or a say in home furniture. Wives purchase what they want and the husband foots the bill. Also, for those who can’t afford the upfront payment of the furniture, take it on credit. I am wondering why did this argument over furniture blew into a divorce? Very unusual.

Alas, some women are unreasonable and want whatever next door Xaliimo purchased for furniture and she has to match. Such type are the illiterate type. If they could work and purchase their furniture all the time and upgrade to whatever her idiot circle of friends are having would be better.

Best Regards

 

[KillStreakIsCool]

I hope they don't have any children


There's a really good friend of mine, a Somali guy, he's an accountant and runs his own company. The man has been doing GREAT, and financially he's probably doing the best amongst our group of friends. He got married about 4 years ago, divorced within less than a two years. He goes back and forth between Alberta and Ontario every 3 weeks to spend time with his daughter, and planning to move permanently closer to his daughter as she starts school in a few years.
If he didn't work out for him, and literally got him significant amount of grey hair in his beard, what kind of chance a reformed saqajaan like myself has?!?1



mind you the straw that broke the camels back was an argument about furniture.....

And it is tough to raise a child in a split home situation. I would rather be patient and fix the issues when kids are involved. I would care more about them and would sacrifice my pleasure and comfort like my parents did for us back in the days. I would hold my grudge until they are all 18 and move on from the misery with a fat retirement check. They can take care of their idiot mom and I become free.

 

[Hodan from HR]

They don't have kids.

It can work out for you. You'll just have to vet for 2-3 years first.

Finally a somali man who agrees with taking your time.

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I shoulda known he was unhinged when he described himself a protector and provider on our first chat..