Which of the following attributes in a woman do you rate the highest.

[Angelina]

Hence why I said proximity and seeking accomplishments aren't the same. I already stated that woman prioritise that and despite that men don't care. Same results come about via proximity from a man's perspective and seeking accomplishments from a woman's. The intentions aren't the same.

I don’t believe that middle class educated men don’t care whatsoever. Is it lower down on their list compared to that of a woman? Yes. But the idea that a man doesn’t value a woman’s education at all isnt something I believe. It varies from community to community and social background.

I agree that a lot of it is proximity, but I do believe that a good % is deliberate. Look at this graph:

One person pointed that ‘This just means men desire women who share the attributes of members of their career and educational peer groups’ but doesn’t that mean that while a woman being educated might not be that important, they might value the qualities you find in accomplished women such as the ability to hold certain conversations?

 

[Sophisticate]

I don’t believe that middle class educated men don’t care whatsoever. Is it lower down on their list compared to that of a woman? Yes. But the idea that a man doesn’t value a woman’s education at all isnt something I believe. It varies from community to community and social background.

You can't expect someone at a different stage of life, not even around men with advanced degrees, to make any proclamations about what they look for. These kiddies don't run in those circles.

Do they require women to be similarly educated? Likely not, but we would be lying if some didn't consider it at all. A woman with what you are looking for physically, interpersonally, religiously and with the added bonus of the same credentials puts her in the running. It is a differentiator, for sure.

 

[Odious Delirium]

You can't expect someone at a different stage of life, not even around men with advanced degrees, to make any proclamations about what they look for. These kiddies don't run in those circles

But I am tho you don't know anything about my circumstances your just jumping to random conclusions based off your own assumptions

This stuff is never an actual thing most guys tend to seek in women as a priority especially not in the context of somali guys if we take out @Angelina trying to inject other cultures into the discussion as well as stats that are irrelevant to us since in general somali women I would say are more educated in comparison to the men and we don't have that cultural push either.

 

[Odious Delirium]

One person pointed that ‘This just means men desire women who share the attributes of members of their career and educational peer groups’ but doesn’t that mean that while a woman being educated might not be that important, they might value the qualities you find in accomplished women such as the ability to hold certain conversations?

I agree with that my point was the intention is different for example if by chance he was with in the proximity of a woman who didn't have an advanced degree but understood his lingo because she studied or took interest in coding (since its readily available on the net) while he got a cs degree doesn't effect anything in his books. She is without the accomplishment of having a formal education with a degree but she's still "smart" and is able to hold those certain convos.

Most courses can be accessed and learned online without the accomplishment

 

[Angelina]

But I am tho you don't know anything about my circumstances your just jumping to random conclusions based off your own assumptions

This stuff is never an actual thing most guys tend to seek in women as a priority especially not in the context of somali guys if we take out @Angelina trying to inject other cultures into the discussion as well as stats that are irrelevant to us since in general somali women I would say are more educated in comparison to the men and we don't have that cultural push either.

Well, thanks that’s another thing I was readying up on as well. You’ve touched on something. Less educated men do not care about education with regards to qualities they’d want in a partner and since Somali men aren’t as educated as Somali women ( supposedly) then if we’re generalizing, that means many Somali men do not care about education.

 

[Angelina]

I agree with that my point was the intention is different for example if by chance he was with in the proximity of a woman who didn't have an advanced degree but understood his lingo because she studied or took interest in coding (since its readily available on the net) while he got a cs degree doesn't effect anything in his books. She is without the accomplishment of having a formal education with a degree but she's still "smart" and is able to hold those certain convos.

Most courses can be accessed and learned online without the accomplishment

But let’s be real, how many women would
do this for the sake of it without trying to get a job out of it at the end of the day?

Well yeah I see your point and I agree. I think for a lot of educated men, a woman that has similar qualifications or more isn’t a requirement, but the ability to live in his ‘world’ per say and keep up intellectually is important. Some Indian groups, Jews and Japanese seem to practice this hence why they have higher IQs in general and very accomplished offsprings.

Smart men don’t devalue intelligence in women as intelligence is mostly inherited particularly from the mother and a lot of it is environmental.

 

[Odious Delirium]

Well, thanks that’s another thing I was readying up on as well. You’ve touched on something. Less educated men do not care about education with regards to qualities they’d want in a partner and since Somali men aren’t as educated as Somali women ( supposedly) then if we’re generalizing, that means many Somali men do not care about education.

I would say however more and more men in today's day and age are more likely to care about women's accomplishments because they expect you to provide equally and aren't really traditional.

The only guys I have seen who cared about the accomplishments of women external to what there parents thought value wise were not trad.

 

[Odious Delirium]

Smart men don’t devalue intelligence in women as intelligence is mostly inherited particularly from the mother and a lot of it is environmental.

I'm not devaluing intelligence in women I'm just saying it's not a requirement and neither is a degree a definitive show of intelligence like I showed in my previous example. Some people are retards even with there degrees.

I personally would like to get married to a smart woman who's on my wavelength. I'm just not going to make lacking a degree a dealbreaker. I have never heard any guy educated or not say that a woman not having a degree was ever a dealbreaker foe them or ever the reason they broke off a talking stage etc

 

[hinters]

Beauty, I'm a shallow man.

 

[Febbie]

You can have a beautiful mind but never apply it. So it's wasted. Accomplish people apply their skills.

 

[The Oponian Guild]

And why?

I like the attributes of soft spoken language, a peaceful house, good cooking food, when I return from work, I shall not be met with complaints about work and sounds of gossip over the phone, but Quran in the background (preferably juz amma) if I have kids in the house, so they may learn the Quran quickly.

 

[HabarSteven12]

We all obvious know it's beauty. It may not be only beauty, but beauty is definitely at the top of their list. Anything else y'all say is a lie

Wait I thought you were a xalimo. I am confused.

 

[HabarSteven12]

attraction gets me intrested, but personality , mindset and their character (aklaq and dean) is what keeps me in. espcially someone i want a famiky with

You are moving like you actually have a chance with a woman.

 

[LEThimCOOK]

We all obvious know it's beauty. It may not be only beauty, but beauty is definitely at the top of their list. Anything else y'all say is a lie

Of course it’s beauty, it’s always been beauty, this is why women spend billions of dollars on makeup and beauty products just to pull the unsuspecting guy down the road. Personally I don’t care for mindset, no man wants a nagging wife with twelve different opinions every hour

 

[LEThimCOOK]

attraction gets me intrested, but personality , mindset and their character (aklaq and dean) is what keeps me in. espcially someone i want a famiky with

You actually like talking to women?

 

[Yaraye]

Wait I thought you were a xalimo. I am confused.

I am a xamilo lol

 

[empressjamila]

Men that only care about beauty in a woman and nothing else tend to be more on the bummy side from what I’ve observed. They don’t have a whole lot going for them. Low intelligence, basically

The most accomplished and intelligent men care about way more than a pretty face. Look at the self made billionaire’s wives they’re usually not stunners. But they tend to be very accomplished in thir own right and probably have nice personalities too

 

[cooli3o]

Men that only care about beauty in a woman and nothing else tend to be more on the bummy side from what I’ve observed. They don’t have a whole lot going for them. Low intelligence, basically

The most accomplished and intelligent men care about way more than a pretty face. Look at the self made billionaire’s wives they’re usually not stunners. But they tend to be very accomplished in thir own right and probably have nice personalities too

a man who is smart wants an intelligent well to do women who makes alot of money, and average joe will go with anything with minimum standards and is convenient for his way of life

 

[Kane]

It's not mutually exclusive. You can find all three in one person.

​

Possibility vs probability

What is accomplishments supposed to even mean in this context??? As in educated/career or are you talking about any kind of basic accomplishment? And why would a guy even care about the accomplishments of a woman if it wont assist him in anyway unless your a 50/50 guy?

Anything that makes a woman self sufficient, some are doing for the 50/50
While for others it’s a class thing.

so what’s your answer Mr?

I am assuming by a woman, you mean a potential wife; if so, under which category does her intellect, Diin, morals, and ethics fall?

Yes wifey material. I would say self image, attitude, habits and beliefs but it’s all the same from a Muslim point of view.

 

[Odious Delirium]

Anything that makes a woman self sufficient, some are doing for the 50/50
While for others it’s a class thing.

so what’s your answer Mr?

I already gave my answer but I picked mentality/mindset