Somali Men and Protective Jealousy ‘Gheera’

[Riya.]

What can we do if the men of our community can’t even protect us.

 

[Keep it a boqol]

It’s the nomadic lifestyle and the influence of women empowerment during siyad barre regime that has made Somali women independent in somali society. Add that with the influence of western society and we are see what we see today

 

[Kan'an]

I agree bout Arab men having more gheera and control over their women. It does not help that in most household the wife/elder daughter is the breadwinner. It's not our womens fault, it is us Somali men who are lacking success and raging sense of responsibility. It is not even exclusive to Arabs. South Asians put family above everything else and send 3/4 of their salary abroad. Most Asians are not masculine but they shoulder their families responsibility with pride & dedication.


When Somali men get money or success they keep the same biil allowance for the existing family and go marry another woman to start all over again.

 

[Danakiil]

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[Kan'an]

The most destructive and vile Somali generation got to be the Boomers. 46_65 Boomers are what sustained the Civil War. Gen X are by product of Boomers failure to contain the civil war and lived majority of their live in lawlessness. Millennials are clueless lot their footprint on Somali politics is minimal they booty shake for whoever Warlord Boomer their clan upheld as a hero on Twitter.

 

[Nikka]

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I dunno about you but my parents were really young adults when the war happened. The blame should be on our grandparents' generation.

 

[Danakiil]

I dunno about you but my parents were really young adults when the war happened. The blame should be on our grandparents' generation.

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[abayoqurux]

I have lived in the Gulf for a few years. As you know Somalia is not the only country that has gone through a devastating conflict in the Muslim world. That said I noticed when compared with their contemporaries from Muslim countries i.e Yemen, Syria, etc they have the most disproportionate amount of females who travel alone via Tahreeb.

You’ll see Yemeni families doing tahriib together, or men alone. Similar with other countries. It’s only us Somali men who have this zero honor dhaqan Honestly. So you’re in Somalia chewing qaad, while your wife, daughter is being approached by a Gulf man at night with oil in his hand saying give me a massage now.

Btw, I even in divorce I notice it doesn’t occur to Somali men that your daughter has your name, any dishonor she undergoes reflects on you.

I noticed Arabs, Pakistanis, others have this intense pride with their women Somalis don’t have.

Gheera is good and all but to say that Arabs and Pakistanis have pride with their women, is there a hidden agenda behind thus, do you want somalis to adopt honor killings sir? Somali women are treated amazingly compared to how South Asian women are in terms of culture, I have loads of female south asian friends and they always talk about how harsh their culture is, living with inlaws after marriage and becoming a maid e.t.c, Please lets take notes from the Quran and sunnah and not from people who still have traces of pre-islamic misogynistic practices within their culture

 

[abayoqurux]

Gheera is good and all but to say that Arabs and Pakistanis have pride with their women, is there a hidden agenda behind thus, do you want somalis to adopt honor killings sir? Somali women are treated amazingly compared to how South Asian women are in terms of culture, I have loads of female south asian friends and they always talk about how harsh their culture is, living with inlaws after marriage and becoming a maid e.t.c, Please lets take notes from the Quran and sunnah and not from people who still have traces of pre-islamic misogynistic practices within their culture

+And also divorce isn't "dishonoring" the hadith sayin that it is the least liked halal thing to Allah is weak and was prolly a way to keep people in abusive relationships together, Don't stigmatize something completely Halal

 

[SanaLaporte]

I have lived in the Gulf for a few years. As you know Somalia is not the only country that has gone through a devastating conflict in the Muslim world. That said I noticed when compared with their contemporaries from Muslim countries i.e Yemen, Syria, etc they have the most disproportionate amount of females who travel alone via Tahreeb.

You’ll see Yemeni families doing tahriib together, or men alone. Similar with other countries. It’s only us Somali men who have this zero honor dhaqan Honestly. So you’re in Somalia chewing qaad, while your wife, daughter is being approached by a Gulf man at night with oil in his hand saying give me a massage now.

Btw, I even in divorce I notice it doesn’t occur to Somali men that your daughter has your name, any dishonor she undergoes reflects on you.

I noticed Arabs, Pakistanis, others have this intense pride with their women Somalis don’t have.

true, no wonder our country is ruined

 

[Sophisticate]

Context matters here, i dont mean they're masculine like men, like roles absolutely reversed. but not as submissive as arab women. But the faaraxs are obviously lacking something considering the state of things...

If anyone fears for their life of course they will be 'submissive'. I mean you can force compliance by ruling your home like a despot. Though to accomplish this you need financial and psychological control. Otherwise your endeavor will fail.

You do not come from such a culture. Perhaps geeljires in the past protected their daughters and wives. Girls still had some freedom of mobility via taking care of livestock. There was never a culture of gender segregation there either. Somali women often travel without their husbands. Somali girls/women often financially contribute to their families (in the post-civil war era). Hence, it is hard if not impossible to assert authority over them in that sense.

 

[Guled111]

I have lived in the Gulf for a few years. As you know Somalia is not the only country that has gone through a devastating conflict in the Muslim world. That said I noticed when compared with their contemporaries from Muslim countries i.e Yemen, Syria, etc they have the most disproportionate amount of females who travel alone via Tahreeb.

You’ll see Yemeni families doing tahriib together, or men alone. Similar with other countries. It’s only us Somali men who have this zero honor dhaqan Honestly. So you’re in Somalia chewing qaad, while your wife, daughter is being approached by a Gulf man at night with oil in his hand saying give me a massage now.

Btw, I even in divorce I notice it doesn’t occur to Somali men that your daughter has your name, any dishonor she undergoes reflects on you.

I noticed Arabs, Pakistanis, others have this intense pride with their women Somalis don’t have.

Somali women love to be dominated by other men because somali men are weak money provider boring husband.

Don't let somali woman drain you. Let her provide and support ajnabi men.
Remember they provide somali wedding and free culture support for their men lol
Somali men who are blaming themselves are chucks.
They need to ask themselves if they have respectful woman in the first place.
You are not a loser to begin with. Wake up bro.
Did the incident happened in Somalia?
Somali men are shocked lol when you marry a xalimo and you are at work,she will allow men to visit her like uncle and other men lol
You think our woman are respectful

 

[Murax]

Gheera is good and all but to say that Arabs and Pakistanis have pride with their women, is there a hidden agenda behind thus, do you want somalis to adopt honor killings sir? Somali women are treated amazingly compared to how South Asian women are in terms of culture, I have loads of female south asian friends and they always talk about how harsh their culture is, living with inlaws after marriage and becoming a maid e.t.c, Please lets take notes from the Quran and sunnah and not from people who still have traces of pre-islamic misogynistic practices within their culture

No walaal nothing about honor killings, being overly protective, controlling, etc. actually opposite Women should be held in the highest esteem, and pedestals. The rate of Somali men Fathers, Husbands, Uncles that literally have zero care in the world what their situation is, I find very troubling l.

I’ve only seen this issue prevalent with African Americans, no other races let alone Muslims.

 

[Murax]

Forgot to add early I also saw this in Istanbul, loads and loads of Somali girls alone zero male guardian trying to get to Europe.

 

[reer]

No walaal nothing about honor killings, being overly protective, controlling, etc. actually opposite Women should be held in the highest esteem, and pedestals. The rate of Somali men Fathers, Husbands, Uncles that literally have zero care in the world what their situation is, I find very troubling l.

I’ve only seen this issue prevalent with African Americans, no other races let alone Muslims.

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[Murax]

The most destructive and vile Somali generation got to be the Boomers. 46_65 Boomers are what sustained the Civil War. Gen X are by product of Boomers failure to contain the civil war and lived majority of their live in lawlessness. Millennials are clueless lot their footprint on Somali politics is minimal they booty shake for whoever Warlord Boomer their clan upheld as a hero on Twitter.

This is the 100% truth. That baby boomer Somali generation inherited a people that were proud, fierce, and if anything used to feed people like the Khaleej instead of begging for expired baasto. I don’t know a generation that collectively destroyed their people.

 

[abayoqurux]

Forgot to add early I also saw this in Istanbul, loads and loads of Somali girls alone zero male guardian trying to get to Europe.

There's a valid Islamic opinion that now women can travel without a mahram because of the safety now compared to 1400 years ago where kidnapping and enslavement were very common, if ur talking about tahreeb and goin on boats i agree with u

 

[Sedderr1234]

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[Murax]

There's a valid Islamic opinion that now women can travel without a mahram because of the safety now compared to 1400 years ago where kidnapping and enslavement were very common, if ur talking about tahreeb and goin on boats i agree with u

Completey agree, but I just think the whole family structure of Somalis is in shambles. I’m not talking about women traveling alone per se but their Father having no clue, or care for how they are, where they are, how they’re doing. Also like I said idiots Somali Dads have the mindset they are divorced from the kids when they divorce the mom.

 

[Guled111]

Completey agree, but I just think the whole family structure of Somalis is in shambles. I’m not talking about women traveling alone per se but their Father having no clue, or care for how they are, where they are, how they’re doing. Also like I said idiots Somali Dads have the mindset they are divorced from the kids when they divorce the mom.

Waryaa don't ignore me. Go in to more details on where the incident occurred. The oil massage story what happened