𐒋𐒖𐒆𐒔𐒖𐒕𐒈
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So, I had more suitors when I was struggling with depression and broke.
- Thread starter Hodan from HR
- Start date
Ghengis Kaarhis
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Hamdullilah you got better, and it was a great decision not to try to get married when unwell. Wish you the best.
Simping 101You’ve leveled up and they’re insecure about it. They can’t see past a xalimo potentially having more qualifications than them to realize what a good mother of their kids you could make.
Allow me to quote the African-American rapper 2Pac…
I say the better read a xalimo, the deeper the roots,
I give a holla to xalimo on a 9-5,
Calaami cares if don’t nobody else care,
And uh, I know Bashir likes to beat you down a lot,
When you come around Karmel, Mahad clowns a lot,
Forgive but don’t forget Xalimo, keep your head up,
And when Jamaac tells you you ain’t nothin’, don’t believe him,
And if Aadan can’t learn to love you, you should leave him,
Cause Hodan you don’t need them,
I just call it how I see ‘em
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Calaami
Garaadka Guud ee Beesha Calaamka
Why would I simp on an Internet forum when I have bad tings in real lifeSimping 101
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Rate yourself from 1-10 and you can’t use 7
it's really that simple. women like guys who are more "successful," men are the opposite. it isn't a big mystery. people can get mad at this all they want but it would be like getting mad about the sky being blue.
I don't know why people aren't just admitting this to you. it isn't doing you any favor if we start digging under rocks and asking about what your face is shaped like. it's pretty obvious that you hit the nail on the head here already.
we might as well declare the case closed and the "mystery" solved. "successful career woman has trouble with lack of suitors".... are people really so naive about how the world works that this surprises them?
So y’all got a whole DM group gossiping about us or what ?You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
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Either way I deny anything that has been said about me idk about @Calaami
So, the issue is quite simple when you were depressed and broke guys could make a difference right?
Now, that you have everything car,house,glowup why do you need a man?
Now, that you have everything car,house,glowup why do you need a man?
Interesting that. But I don’t believe you. Men most definitely are intimated by beautiful, intelligent and well put together women and those women don’t ‘hook up’ so your example is already a flawed one.
It might sound like a female centric cliche that men do get ‘intimidated’ but it’s also the view of Jordon Peterson, who is very much anti-feminist. Combine that with the fact that studies show that men can become more abusive or horrible to their spouses if the female is the breadwinner or is more educated/higher IQ, the idea that men aren’t intimidated by women who exhibit both immense beauty and intelligence isn’t a convincing argument. For those that believe that men aren’t intimidated watch this. I don’t usually agree with a lot of Jordan’s point, but because of the fact that we have psychologists who are conservative, anti-feminist ect who are also agreeing with that point shows it is a phenomenon that is observed by people from all walks of life and not just one concocted by women as a feel good cope.
Does a woman have to be down on her luck and going through mental episodes for a man to feel like a man?
It’s rather worrying that now Alhamdulliah she’s in a good position in life, some of the guys around her are intimidated. It begs the question do women have to remain stagnant? Lie and pretend to be in a worse position than they really are, or turn down blessings and opportunities that Allah sends their way. It’s baffling. Btw, even telling her this won’t do her any favors as it isn’t something she can do anything about, unless you want to her to purposely sabatage and downgrade her life ect all in the pursuit of a man.
@Hodan from HR
One advise I’ll give a woman is never lead with your success or triumphs.
Also, Hodan the idea that all men dislike successful women isn’t true, although a good % are most definitely intimated. However, if we look at society at large and statistics, most men are married to their social equal, so InshaAllah, you will find a man who is confident enough to not tie his manhood to women’s intelligence, education or wealth.
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Alhamdulillah, glad you’re doing better now.
These men are known as Future Avoiders - do not waste your time with them. If a man is interested in you then there will be no doubt about his interest because he will not risk losing you. He snoozes, he loses. On to the next one. May Allah bless you with a righteous spouse with a kind heart. Ameen.
These men are known as Future Avoiders - do not waste your time with them. If a man is interested in you then there will be no doubt about his interest because he will not risk losing you. He snoozes, he loses. On to the next one. May Allah bless you with a righteous spouse with a kind heart. Ameen.
so don't tell her the truth? ok, so I should lie to her? don't be honest with her and send her on a wild goose chase thinking it's the way her face is shaped or something?
or talk about men being "insecure" or whatever.
the nature of men is the nature of men.
women tend to like men who are taller and who make more money, right? and this is by nature, is it not?
and men and women are designed to be complementary, yes? so naturally a woman will tend to go for a guy who is taller and makes more money. and naturally a man will go for a woman who is shorter and makes less money.
getting mad at this is like getting mad about the sky being blue. it's just nature and reality.
I don't have any predetermined agenda and I don't care whether the truth fits in with any predetermined social agenda. I believe in "keeping it real" and telling people the truth. I think it's cruel to leave people in the dark. if your philosophy is at odds with truth and reality and at odds with just plain telling people the truth... well there's something wrong with the philosophy. my view is that the truth has value in itself. not as a means to an end but that the truth is valuable for its own sake.
the first thing is we should seek out the truth- and then go from there. we shouldn't worry about whether the truth is convenient or not to any predetermined agenda. what I've done is mentioned the basic, real truth as to male and female nature. getting mad about men preferring less "successful" partners is as pointless as getting mad about women preferring more "successful" partners. it just is what it is. why get mad at me for being honest and telling the truth about this? Allah is the one who designed things like this and who designed male and female nature. how are you going to get mad at me for how Allah designed things? if anything you should take it up with Allah. if you think Allah did things incorrectly and you know better, I guess you should take it up with Allah.
Far from it. Just reminiscing about the good old days.So y’all got a whole DM group gossiping about us or what ?
Either way I deny anything that has been said about me idk about @Calaami
So, you're a colourist I see. 
also just to elaborate... ok maybe someone says
"Omar del Sur.... what you have mentioned isn't by nature and how Allah designed men and women.... it is all a social construct".....
in pretty much every society in the world throughout history- women tend to be.... what's that word.... I think "hypergamous".... it's a new word, at least to me and at least as far as being a mainstream word.... but what I mean is... women tend to go for more "successful" men... if we look at any ancient civilization or modern civilization.... in whatever part of the world... what I talked about will tend to be the case... women will tend to prefer a more "successful" man, men will tend to prefer less "successful" woman..... either this is something innate in men and women or every civilization in history in every period basically are all in on a giant conspiracy.... even I am not that big a conspiracy theorist....
EDIT: in fact, even if you read classical fiqh manuals that talk about marriage compatibility.... even classical fiqh manuals talk about this... what I mean is, even classical fiqh manuals will discourage marriage between a lower-status man with a higher-status woman... what I'm talking about is as universal as the sky being blue... and so naturally if it is not advised for a lower-status man to be with a higher-status woman... then naturally the field widens for a man as he rises in status and the field narrows for the woman as she rises in social status... this is as natural as a woman liking a tall, muscular or wealthy man.... if you get mad about this, this is like getting mad that 1+1=2... there is no point in fighting 1+1=2, we just have to accept it and go from there
"Omar del Sur.... what you have mentioned isn't by nature and how Allah designed men and women.... it is all a social construct".....
in pretty much every society in the world throughout history- women tend to be.... what's that word.... I think "hypergamous".... it's a new word, at least to me and at least as far as being a mainstream word.... but what I mean is... women tend to go for more "successful" men... if we look at any ancient civilization or modern civilization.... in whatever part of the world... what I talked about will tend to be the case... women will tend to prefer a more "successful" man, men will tend to prefer less "successful" woman..... either this is something innate in men and women or every civilization in history in every period basically are all in on a giant conspiracy.... even I am not that big a conspiracy theorist....
EDIT: in fact, even if you read classical fiqh manuals that talk about marriage compatibility.... even classical fiqh manuals talk about this... what I mean is, even classical fiqh manuals will discourage marriage between a lower-status man with a higher-status woman... what I'm talking about is as universal as the sky being blue... and so naturally if it is not advised for a lower-status man to be with a higher-status woman... then naturally the field widens for a man as he rises in status and the field narrows for the woman as she rises in social status... this is as natural as a woman liking a tall, muscular or wealthy man.... if you get mad about this, this is like getting mad that 1+1=2... there is no point in fighting 1+1=2, we just have to accept it and go from there
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Internet Nomad
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Don’t think it’s wise to say that Allah created men and women like this since we know that the Prophet s.a.w married a woman who was richer than him and also, Khadijah was sought by the men of Quraish due to her riches and and tribal lineage. Also, historically men preferred women from wealthy families and well known lineages. We all know the famous Hadith of the Prophet s.a.w in which he said men marry for 4 reasons. Wealth and lineage is one of them. Does that mean that the Prophet s.a.w doesn’t know the nature of man? Of course not. It shows that culture and time plays a role. I’m not denying hypergamy but the idea that men would be put of by a woman’s high status is new one. That wasn’t the case in Quraishi society.
the reason why I say it’s insecurity Is because studies show that some men are even intimidated by a woman being very intelligent as well. That isn’t linked to merely success as it is something that many are born with and hone in life. It’s a form of insecurity when you feel the need to be above a woman by every metric in order to feel like a ‘man’. That’s my point, If you get the drift.
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