Reer London take this L

[Macalin M]

Agreed.

This isn’t just in the Somali community though, it’s worldwide. Boys are treated more harshly by their fathers the same way mothers treat their daughters harshly. In prisons you see boys with no father figures. They haven’t got somebody to teach them because the single mother struggles in this way.
The way you worded it implies you believe this is only in the Somali community which is why I stated this

 

[Muji]

This isn’t just in the Somali community though, it’s worldwide. Boys are treated more harshly by their fathers the same way mothers treat their daughters harshly. In prisons you see boys with no father figures. They haven’t got somebody to teach them because the single mother struggles in this way.
The way you worded it implies you believe this is only in the Somali community which is why I stated this

I see. I have no experience with other communities.

By not setting any boundaries for your kids you set them up to fail. If I treat my son like a king and always cleaned up after him, he is going to expect the rest of the world to treat him the same. Hence why Somali boys respond really badly to authority, be it at school or law inforcement. I’ve seen so many somali boys genuinely shocked when they haven’t received jobs or wives whilst doing the bare minimum. I guess the mothers don’t know any better but I hope the next generation will be better.

 

[Macalin M]

I see. I have no experience with other communities.

By not setting any boundaries for your kids you set them up to fail. If I treat my son like a king and always cleaned up after him, he is going to expect the rest of the world to treat him the same. Hence why Somali boys respond really badly to authority, be it at school or law inforcement. I’ve seen so many somali boys genuinely shocked when they haven’t received jobs or wives whilst doing the bare minimum. I guess the mothers don’t know any better but I hope the next generation will be better.

But that’s why the father is there, if the son starts taking his mothers kindness for granted then she can just call up the dad and the dad can do something. I wouldn’t say my dad treated my harshly because I was never a bad kid. He taught me valuable life lessons that my mum never taught me. But my mum cared for me more. The things my dad does with my little sisters he never done with me but i don’t care because I understand it.

Where do you live by the way, you don’t have to be area specific, there’s no Somalis in my area but everyone here seems to live with them and them only you would think they live in Somalia

 

[Muji]

But that’s why the father is there, if the son starts taking his mothers kindness for granted then she can just call up the dad and the dad can do something. I wouldn’t say my dad treated my harshly because I was never a bad kid. He taught me valuable life lessons that my mum never taught me. But my mum cared for me more. The things my dad does with my little sisters he never done with me but i don’t care because I understand it.

Where do you live by the way, you don’t have to be area specific, there’s no Somalis in my area but everyone here seems to live with them and them only you would think they live in Somalia

It’s not about being harsh it’s about giving them a realistic perspective on life. Getting them to fix their beds from a young age, setting the tables and so on. Children actually love to learn and once they get used to the comfort of a freshly made bed they will never sleep in a pig sty.

I’ve seen a father who gave his son up to the police for a crime his son committed, at first I didn’t understand but now I know he did the right thing. I hope I instill responsibilty and morals on to my kids.

Also, the amount of men here who demand a woman who cooks and cleans for them. It’s a major red flag, what women would want to live the rest of their life carrying a grown man around.

 

[AliUK]

It’s not about being harsh it’s about giving them a realistic perspective on life. Getting them to fix their beds from a young age, setting the tables and so on. Children actually love to learn and once they get used to the comfort of a freshly made bed they will never sleep in a pig sty.

I’ve seen a father who gave his son up to the police for a crime his son committed, at first I didn’t understand but now I know he did the right thing. I hope I instill responsibilty and morals on to my kids.

Also, the amount of men here who demand a woman who cooks and cleans for them. It’s a major red flag, what women would want to live the rest of their life carrying a grown man around.

We shouldn't acquaint cooking and cleaning and carrying an adult. A lot of women would love nothing better than to do this and enjoy their life whilst their husband gets the bread.

 

[Muji]

We shouldn't acquaint cooking and cleaning and carrying an adult. A lot of women would love nothing better than to do this and enjoy their life whilst their husband gets the bread.

Ali I’m telling you from a female perspective if a guy tells me he wants a woman to and clean for him, it would be a sign of chauvinism. You can dress it up how you like but that’s the way it is. Just like if I had told a man I’m looking for someone who will fund my spending for the rest of my life...he would get gold digger vibes. It works both ways.

 

[AliUK]

Ali I’m telling you from a female perspective if a guy tells me he wants a woman to and clean for him, it would be a sign of chauvinism. You can dress it up how you like but that’s the way it is. Just like if I had told a man I’m looking for someone who will fund my spending for the rest of my life...he would get gold digger vibes. It works both ways.

Fair enough, never thought of it like that.