Men who only seek virgin wives have small penises

[Sophisticate]

I think I read on here before that you wish to only marry a man from the same tribe/sub tribe as you? Personally, I think you would be more successful if you were more open minded abayo. Personally, despite being from a family rife with tribalism I’d be open to marrying a Somali man from any tribe and/or region. I’d prefer one whose family is not filled with cuqdad and good terms with my tribe. Allah SWT will not ask you your tribe on the day of judgment.

You should also be open to marrying a younger man. My friend with a PHD married at 33, her now husband was 29 at the time.

If you’re serious and in the GTA start with the ISNA matrionial mixer.
http://www.isna.ca/3/26/matrimonial-mixer-program

While I’ve heard it skews heavily South Asian. There are Somali men present at said event I’ve heard. You can’t do anything about your age but it helps if you’re very good looking cause the pretty girls get the most attention at such events. Men form ques to talk to you. Cultivate your look ie work on your makeup and personal style.


You can try PureMatrimony and Half our Deen (both paid sites). You can also try the masjid sign up route depending on your religiosity.

Getting married is a part-time job. I’ve been trying to get married off and on since I was 23. Four and half years. And I’ve tried any and all avenue open to me.

You need to take it serious if you have not. Cause these girls out here are. My friend just got married at 31 after a exhaustive 6 year pursuit of this goal.

I would email you this privately but I don’t think I can pm until 500 posts.

Hey sis,

Thanks for the advice. I have never taken marriage seriously. I realize it's a job on its own. Part of me is quite content with being single - it's stress free. I am by no means a tribalist. It's just easier marrying from within. But age is something I cannot compromise on. I don't pursue men. It's normally the other way around. Perhap, I'm old fashioned in that regard.

 

[Sophisticate]

No. However, being a beautiful woman is a blessing and a curse. She attracts womanisers like flies on shit.

As for the rest of your post, Masaajidka Ciyaarta Ka Daa! It ain't like you do not have any suitors. However, you cannot help but focus on the imperfections that you see. Stop being too analytical, and judgemental. Ignorance can be Bliss!

My reasons for rejection are very legtimate. And I'm not very judgemental.

 

[Periodicbrilliance]

Hey sis,

Thanks for the advice. I have never taken marriage seriously. I realize it's a job on its own. Part of me is quite content with being single - it's stress free. I am by no means a tribalist. It's just easier marrying from within. But age is something I cannot compromise on. I don't pursue men. It's normally the other way around. Perhap, I'm old fashioned in that regard.

My bad, I was under the impression you were dissatisfied with your marital status. To each his own, in terms of the tribe thing. But I do think you are being close minded in terms of age.

Age is just a number and not truly indicative of maturity or lack thereof from what I’ve found. At my age, I prefer older men (30-35) because they’re more likely to be established and able to a traditional provider. My beauty and youth inexchange for their material assets and social status. Seems like a fair exchange. But I’d marry a guy younger than me if he ticked all my boxes.

I’ve never pursuit men. I’m a rules girl. I get approached constantly by ajanib I just don’t know many marriageable Somali men. Because my family does associate with other Somalis overly much. I’ve pursuit a goal (marriage) and put myself out there in pursuit of that goal. Something I will encourage my future daughters, younger cousins and all other women of my acquaintance to do.

Marriage like getting a good job or education is something you have to actively pursue.

 

[anonimo]

My reasons for rejection are very legtimate. And I'm not very judgemental.

 

[Sophisticate]

My bad, I was under the impression you were dissatisfied with your marital status. To each his own, in terms of the tribe thing. But I do think you are being close minded in terms of age.

Age is just a number and not truly indicative of maturity or lack thereof from what I’ve found. At my age, I prefer older men (30-35) because they’re more likely to be established and able to a traditional provider. My beauty and youth inexchange for their material assets and social status. Seems like a fair exchange. But I’d marry a guy younger than me if he ticked all my boxes.

I’ve never pursuit men. I’m a rules girl. I get approached constantly by ajanib I just don’t know many marriageable Somali men. Because my family does associate with other Somalis overly much. I’ve pursuit a goal (marriage) and put myself out there in pursuit of that goal. Something I will encourage my future daughters, younger cousins and all other women of my acquaintance to do.

Marriage like getting a good job or education is something you have to actively pursue.

Fascinating, I normally screen for age so younger fellows don't meet the cut. I'm particular about it. More than most.

It seems laborious. More power to you for making it like a job. I admire your commitment.

 

[Sophisticate]

Why the long face? This should be interesting.

 

[anonimo]

Why the long face? This should be interesting.

That's my way of saying sorry Ina Adeer. The initial post was partially made in jest. Nonetheless, I was serious about the Ignorance is Bliss part. The more perceptive you are, the less likely you are to fall solely for Hadal Macaan or Good Looks.

 

[Sophisticate]

That my way of saying sorry Ina Adeer. That post was partially made in jest. Nonetheless, I was serious about the Ignorance is Bliss part. The more perceptive you are, the less likely you are to fall for solely Hadal Macaan or Good Looks.

I do my research. It's best to fact check to corroborate stories and gather intel. I've dodged many bullets that way.

 

[Periodicbrilliance]

Fascinating, I normally screen for age so younger fellows don't meet the cut. I'm particular about it. More than most.

It seems laborious. More power to you for making it like a job. I admire your commitment.

Prophet(pbuh) said "When the son of Adam dies, all his deeds come to an end, except for three: ongoing charity, beneficial knowledge or a righteous son who will pray for him.” (Muslim)

It is worth it. May we all have children who pray for us long after we’ve gone. Ameen.

 

[VixR]

A Somali acquaintance of mine once remarked that he felt like getting violent with women after sex as he felt disgusted with himself. As if women were to blame for his biological urge for sex.

Sometimes, the cold treatment that Somali men mete out to Somali women after a one night stand is driven by the cultural perception that she is a ''. Come to think of it, this can apply to men from other ethnic backgrounds too. To an extent, it is a guy thing.

It's pretty common, and not just among Muslim men, but men of Christian backgrounds too I've noticed.

(1) That biological urge has been indoctrinately shamed from a young age through religious doctrine outside the confines of marriage.

(2) Men generally deal with situations in that way, by acting out externally.

As a direct consequence/product of (1) & (2), anytime their biological urges overpower their socioreligious conditioning, they tend to deal with the byproduct of that shame/blame from partaking in illicit premarital sex by deflecting it away from the self and onto the woman, the outside factor, if that makes sense.

Conversely, say a guy is having a hard time getting laid, they overwhelmingly tend to steer their resentment and inadequacies of self away from the self and onto the outside subject, ie women at large, often in the form of anger.

 

[anonimo]

It's pretty common, and not just among Muslim men, but men of Christian backgrounds too.

(1) That biological urge has been indoctrinately shamed through eligious doctrine outside the confines of marriage.

(2) Men generally deal with situations in that way, by acting out externally.

As a direct consequence/product of (1) & (2),anytime their biological urges overpower their societal conditioning, they tend to deal with the byproduct of that shame/blame from partaking in illicit premarital sex by deflecting it away from the self and onto the woman, the outside factor, if that makes sense.

Conversely, say a guy is having a hard time getting laid, they overwhelmingly tend to steer their resentment and inadequacies of self away from the self and onto the outside subject, ie women atlarge, in the form of anger.

Damned if they put out, and damned if they don't.

Always a pleasure VixR.

 

[Professor]

I would like a virgin girl, I would take a non hoe non virgin wife though any day. Also my thing is so big I can perfectly placed my iPhone on it and it won't fall so I don'the think that is true because man regardless of their size would like a virgin wife . Most men including non muslims would take a virgin wife but as @anonimo said I would understand if a girl lost her virginity to a man who she thought was the one. Woman can be impressionable and how ever fucked up this might be i have taken advantage of innocent girls, so if she slipped up, who am I to judge.

 

[anonimo]

I would like a virgin girl, I would take a non hoe non virgin wife though any day. Also my thing is so big I can perfectly placed my iPhone on it and it won't fall, . Most men including non muslims would take a virgin wife but as @anonimo said I would understand if a girl lost her virginity to a man who she thought was the one. Woman can be impressionable and how ever fucked up this might be i have taken advantage of innocent girls, so if she slipped up, who am I to judge.

 

[VixR]

Damned if they put out, and damned if they don't.

Always a pleasure VixR.

Damned is the pleaser of masses is my takeaway. You pursue your own path.