Educated Somali Men marrying from back home

[embarassing]

well, this is not the case with 1 or 2 faaraxs we are talking 100s of somali guys who would opt to marry from Somalia than the west. Personally, I desired to marry from here to an educated, religious and goal-oriented xalimo.

Many epidemics

 

[Hoosjeed]

That's interesting. Were they raised in the west?

I've only ever heard of old odays doing this. I can understand an older Somali doing it too, even then I haven't heard of it.

What do they have in common?

It is getting a bit more common, but I agree the author is overplaying it. It is a minority of men that are doing it, but it is significant enough that if the trend continues it could leave some Somali girls who want to marry Somali men without a partner. It is mainly males in their late 20s and early 30s that are doing it, and it is more common in the UK than North America from what I've observed.

This is way more of an issue with the Pakistani community in the UK. Those guys literally import women from their own ancestral villages because they (and especially their mother's) want a daughter in law they can control.

 

[embarassing]

It is getting a bit more common, but I agree the author is overplaying it. It is a minority of men that are doing it, but it is significant enough that if the trend continues it could leave some Somali girls who want to marry Somali men without a partner. It is mainly males in their late 20s and early 30s that are doing it, and it is more common in the UK than North America from what I've observed.

This is way more of an issue with the Pakistani community in the UK. Those guys there literally import women from their own ancestral villages because they (and especially their mother's) want a daughter in law they can control.

Yeah that would make sense as I've never even heard about a situation like that.
Pakistanis on the other hand, I've seen that more than western Pakistanis marrying eachother. They plan a random trip back home and come back with a whole person.

 

[napolitano]

Go for it? I dont even want to go for it lol but if i dont have another option, what should i do then?

Im educated, im muslim, i love my family and i lovo to have a family one day
If all the equal somali guys here dont want me but look abroad, thats their choice good for them..but i wont do the same thing
And if the remaining guys are not worth me, than i wont do that too

So only option is to marry other muslim nationalities...

Serious question. Where do I (an educated Somali guy) find women like you? In my world you don't exist, or if you do you have a sexual past

 

[Inquisitive_]

That's interesting. Were they raised in the west?

I've only ever heard of old odays doing this. I can understand an older Somali doing it too, even then I haven't heard of it.

What do they have in common?

The OP is correct the numbers are really picking up among the educated and the smart man, I am one of those that plan to do it back home as well, the reasons are multitude and I have already quashed the "it's because they are submissive" myth in #82 post on this thread.

Adversity produces great people while prosperity and privilege creates pathetically weak entitled monsters, a women is at the core of the household the absolute nucleus, she makes or breaks that households, a strong women can string along a pathetic or weak husbands along effortlessly without that household collapsing, I have even see them change pathetic males into great man.

Our forefathers as a result coined the following "Your Son/Daughter need you most when you pick their mother" even they had the wisdom to acknowledge this because a man regardless how strong or pious cannot carry a dead weight or a bad women around, they struggle even with the average ones.

Therein lies the crux of the problem, in an environment were privilege, prosperity and ease is rife, the gems are rare and the useless materialistic filth are produced in abundance (same for the man)

To add further insult they attach a 'monetary value' on themselves which is text book definition of a "", it's absolute lunacy to the highest degree because she views the money being carelessly wasted as "his money" rather then "their" money which it essentially is, forcing you to walk headfirst not only into haram but also debt from the very beginning.

That is the majority of the stupefied dumb immature tacky highly entitled classless types of women the few educated or smart man will have to deal with in the diaspora purely because of the environment they were brought up.

The question is no longer "how much will you compromise including on the religious front" but also "how much debt you willing to go into for that compromise", it's something only a lunatic would bargain with and hence the crazy divorce rates we see, yes there are some very few gems that are not like this but that's needle in the haystack kind of odds to find.

 

[embarassing]

The OP is correct the numbers are really picking up among the educated and the smart man, I am one of those that plan to do it back home as well, the reasons are multitude and I have already quashed the "it's because they are submissive" myth in #82 post on this thread.

Adversity produces great people while prosperity and privilege creates pathetically weak entitled monsters, a women is at the core of the household the absolute nucleus, she makes or breaks that households, a strong women can string along a pathetic or weak husbands along effortlessly without that household collapsing, I have even see them change pathetic males into great man.

Our forefathers as a result coined the following "Your Son/Daughter need you most when you pick their mother" even they had the wisdom to acknowledge this because a man regardless how strong or pious cannot carry a dead weight or a bad women around, they struggle even with the average ones.

Therein lies the crux of the problem, in an environment were privilege, prosperity and ease is rife, the gems are rare and the useless materialistic filth are produced in abundance (same for the man)

To add further insult they attach a 'monetary value' on themselves which is text book definition of a "", it's absolute lunacy to the highest degree because she views the money being carelessly wasted as "his money" rather then "their" money which it essentially is, forcing you to walk headfirst not only into haram but also debt from the very beginning.

That is the majority of the stupefied dumb immature tacky highly entitled classless types of women the few educated or smart man will have to deal with in the diaspora purely because of the environment they were brought up.

The question is no longer "how much will you compromise including on the religious front" but also "how much debt you willing to go into for that compromise", it's something only a lunatic would bargain with and hence the crazy divorce rates we see, yes there are some very few gems that are not like this but that's needle in the haystack kind of odds to find.

A great explanation, I appreciate it.

 

[Kia12]

It is getting a bit more common, but I agree the author is overplaying it. It is a minority of men that are doing it, but it is significant enough that if the trend continues it could leave some Somali girls who want to marry Somali men without a partner. It is mainly males in their late 20s and early 30s that are doing it, and it is more common in the UK than North America from what I've observed.

This is way more of an issue with the Pakistani community in the UK. Those guys literally import women from their own ancestral villages because they (and especially their mother's) want a daughter in law they can control.

I think Somali guys marrying Somali girls is more prevalent in the US because gaining a green card is much easier same with other mainland European countries.
It is really tough to import your partner to the UK these days. You have to be earning over a certain amount of money. You have to pay for your partners living expenses and have to prove that they will not be a burden on public services. On top of that, you will get heavily taxed each year and will have to fork out a couple of thousands of pounds towards the NHS. Then you have to renew your partner's visa each year and that's another couple of thousands of pounds down the drain. Explain to me how would a girl who is from back home even manage to get a job here because you will need to be very skilled and meet the skills shortages list that the government has set out so that you aren't competing with the natives.
A few years ago, however, it was particularly easier to import your partner to the UK. My abti who is in his 40s, for example, imported his wife from Burco and she hasn't faced any of the restriction which is placed on new immigrants these days so she was quite lucky.

 

[Hemaal]

I knew few ivy league Somali female graduates who married from back home as well. It isn't the men only.

 

[bluebird]

I don't care. horta do the ppl who complain about this kind of thing expect to marry every single man/woman who happens to be the same race as them out there to worry? you'll end up with ONE person out of God knows how much, and so relax

 

[Zumar]

Serious question. Where do I (an educated Somali guy) find women like you? In my world you don't exist, or if you do you have a sexual past

Not on social media..i deleted all my social media accounts, didnt like it that much

But tbh i thought all somali girls were like me or even better..and now im seeing atheist girls, lesbian somali girls etc

 

[The Cushitic One]

Truth of the matter.

Somali mothers who cradle their sons and do not let them help with the household chores are to blame.

These men grow up self entitled and
Expect a female, to work full time
Like him and than to come home
And cook and clean.

Their insane, let them go back home,
And marry.

Plenty more fish in the sea.

No one wants an insecure male
Chauvinist pig anyways

 

[Garaad Darawiish]

Many epidemics

bot an epidemic, its a wise choice based off

Truth of the matter.

Somali mothers who cradle their sons and do not let them help with the household chores are to blame.

These men grow up self entitled and
Expect a female, to work full time
Like him and than to come home
And cook and clean.

Their insane, let them go back home,
And marry.

Plenty more fish in the sea.

No one wants an insecure male
Chauvinist pig anyways

Your "credentials" don't attract Somali men! Just because you feel that you are successful, independent, professional and educated doesn’t mean that’s you are attractive to Somali men, or even datable for that matter. It it is your EXTERIOR that gets a Somali man's attention (smile, look, personality, non-y attitude, confidence and overall attractiveness) and your INTERIOR (your love for Allah, family, friends, being honest, supportive, respectful, emotionally stable, goal-oriented) that keeps a Somali man coming back for more.

Thats why you see most highly educated and sucessful Somali men in the western diaspora do not marry equally educated westernized Somali women. Most marry either from back home, middle east or marry some humble religious family oriented woman regardless of her educational attainment. Some go the extra mile and marry out to ajnabis. These are dudes who are doctors, engineers,professionals and many of them have jobs at companies like microsoft, google etc. You rarely see them marry from the western diaspora.

Hence why today you see a lot of Xalimo's complaining. ''I got my degree, education why is it so hard to find an educated Somali man''. ''Why do educated Somali men marry uneducated women''.

It's because Somali men are not looking for the so called strong, independent, ''i don't need a man, i can take care of myself'' westernized Somali woman who would ask for a divorce just so she can focus on her career(self) and only wants to compete with him.

 

[anonimo]

I always thought that there was a dearth of Educated Somali men and they were spoilt for choice.

Are all the 'good' girls taken? If that is the case then I guess desperate circumstances call for desperate measures.

 

[ILBIR]

• Let me tackle this naive way of thinking.

 

[AussieHustler]

Garaad and his ilk are angry male garoobs who blame the failure of their marriages squarely on the rearing and attitudes of xalimos born/bred in the diaspora. What they are seeking is a doormat who is reliant on their income and does what she is told. What they didn’t mention in that article is the middle aged men who were the pioneers & sought younger wives (similar ages to their daughters) back home, while abandoning their wives and children in the diaspora. They created a phenomenon known as the single mother syndrome where their children were lost to the juvenile justice system and the criminal justice systems. This had a catastrophic and traumatic result on many Somali families in the diaspora. Now, we have garaad and his ilk spinning a failed project. Guys, I feel for your previous wife and the kids that you have abandoned and wish you guys a better parenting this time around. But please, don’t glamorise for us your dysfunctionality as deadbeat dads.

 

[ILBIR]

How naive of you poster. You think the ones back home are 'angels' well your in for a disappointment. I'm a University Student currently in MN I also am a hopeful Entrepreneur, looking to build a business while I'm studying. Before that when I graduate High School I took off a year to go an travel I ended up in Somalia, a large city which I cannot say due to privacy. Anyways, I was led to believe by my peers that the girls are "perfect" little angels boy was I in for a surprise. It was a modern Sodom & Gommorah I amount of fitna going on was astronomical. I saw girls around 19 yes of age drinking, and chewing the cursed plant called
Cath Edulis known as Khat. I was bewildered and off were the rosy coloured glasses I use to wear when I was like you poster a naive boy now that I am a man I don't believe in everything unless I do a strict background check. The girls in this big city also went out to parties and engaged in casual sex as if it were 'ilbaxnimo' one girl actually said that to me when I inquired about her lifestyle and said "Why?" She let out a laugh like a banshee and said "War wa ilbaxnimo wa reer magalnimo sidan ee ifahan noh." I shook my head and excused myself from the gathering not until I berated my cousin for bringing me into such a sorry gathering. There were people going at it like rabbits in the other room where you could here gruntings like two pigs dirty and loud, labouring toiling, rutting with each other with no shame. I could see clear as day things weren't so simple
Western Xalimos = Bad, immoral, cheap and clean..
vs
Native Xalimos: Good, moral, angelic, clean, flawless, etc..

Its not as simple as that unfortunately. As a man on this forum once said and I wholeheartedly agree with him and I consider him one of my favorite posters.

"A MAN IS JUDGED FOR WHO HE MARRIES."

I agree with this because if you marry a low class you yourself are going to be considered low class man without morals. If you marry the neighborhood 'car' one that everyone got to drive well it all on you considering you should've approached marriage like a business deal you can't rush or you will end up with the a bad deal and in the process get screwed over.

The thing is modern woman are more alike then they are different especially city girls, I am correct when I say 99.9999% of girls in big cities like Mogadishu, Hargesa, Kismayo, Garowe, etc.. are not virgins and this is the general rule. There is so much fitnah going on in big cities even the teachers are having sex with these horny girls a girl got pregnant by her teacher in the area I lived in in Somalia which goes to show young girls in big cities in Somalia are exposed to sex early. Another scandal that happened in one of the dugsis young girls are fingering themselves goes to show you this myth Western Somali girls bad. Native Somali girls good needs to end.

Now I'm not saying Western Somali Girls are free from wrongdoings in fact they are the biggest s and they give it up to ajnabis and if I had to choose I'd take my chance with the Native Girls back home.

These same girls in Somalia if they had the chance to go to the West would fall into dom in the west fucking .

I really have to STRESS marriage is a big deal it can make or break you, a man who is lucky enough to marry a virgin will be the one to build an empire, lead armies, invent, or contribute to the sciences.

Remember men do as I do, wait to marry unlike woman with their biological clocks we will be able to fertilize the malab well into our 90's as long as we maintain our health an live an organic and holistic lifestyle avoiding feminizing plastics and foods.

 

[ILBIR]

Garaad and his ilk are angry male garoobs who blame the failure of their marriages squarely on the rearing and attitudes of xalimos born/bred in the diaspora. What they are seeking is a doormat who is reliant on their income and does what she is told. What they didn’t mention in that article is the middle aged men who were the pioneers & sought younger wives (similar ages to their daughters) back home, while abandoning their wives and children in the diaspora. They created a phenomenon known as the single mother syndrome where their children were lost to the juvenile justice system and the criminal justice systems. This had a catastrophic and traumatic result on many Somali families in the diaspora. Now, we have garaad and his ilk spinning a failed project. Guys, I feel for your previous wife and the kids that you have abandoned and wish you guys a better parenting this time around. But please, don’t glamorise for us your dysfunctionality as deadbeat dads.

Spoken like a true feminist you do not realize these women are responsible for driving away their husbands into the arms of younger girls back home. There are some women who can be so loudmouth, crass, low class, vulgar, nagging, etc... that the father has to bounce due to the disrespect being shown to him by his wife. A good woman won't drive away her husband but will do everything in her power to show her feminine virtues.

 

[ILBIR]

To add to my point us Somali Men like any other black man thinks with his dick, no self-control, no emotional maturity, etc.. We are no different from those Madow AA's or Jamaicans we hate because we as a community are suffering from what they as a community are suffering from: single motherhood, lack of educational achievements, drug and alcohol problems no wonder reer Canada are known as reer henessy because they worship the alcohol instead of alle, education, and self sufficiency. Our Somali children are dysfunctional, the boys are gangsters the girls are harlots. Now I don't mean all Somalis or even most but a large proportion.

Before you marry men achieve something get you degrees, the useful ones, get hired and make money but always make money to be self sufficient run a business part time invest your money into land, real-estate, start-up, etc.. Once you have solidified your place in the world and can guarantee your future spawn aka offspring an inheritance think about getting married but hire the best detectives that money can buy it is his job to investigate said woman's reputation in the community, look at her social media and internet footprint (that post where you talked about how you had a fling with some handsome ajanabi or that post you were insulting "ashy abdis and uplifting ajanabi', that picture you thought you deleted with Abu Tyrone who had his arms around you, etc..) all these things can be gathered and the dedicated PI will go to great lengths trying to retrieve it. Also it helps if you P.I. understands programming it will make his search easier. Also check if she has a Hymen if you are unable to identify it have a Gynecologist who is Muslim and understands such tests have her do it a Midwife also works who has to deal with female vag. day in day out. Also, make sure to inquire about her family you don't want to marry the daughter of people who use to beg in Mogadishu that would look bad on you. Marry someone with at least a bachelors 1 high iq individual + another high IQ indivual = high IQ baby who will be much more likely to succeed.
but if she has been infected with the feminist bug discard her she is untreatable take your chances with a low achieving xalimo who is pro patriarchy you can manage to cure stupid with good work ethic but you cannot cure a man-hater.

 

[Jake from State Farm]

Just found this thread. I didn't know there were actually a lot of un married educated Muslim women(especially somalis) at 30+.It doesn't bother me at all if a girl is educated honestly. I have career goals to become a doctor and if I'm 30+years old when I do complete my education. I would prefer a spouse near my age or atleast the Same age as me. Never liked the idea of Big age gaps in marriage. I'm trying to meet an educated Halimo and form a power couple.

 

[Saalax Bidaar]

Give me geeljire xalimmo with daqan and pure culture over “educated”, Tyrone loving, Palestinian flag waving, make up wearing SJWtwitter having Halimo