Dating For Old Somalis Is Tough

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Hayee nolishiida ayan ku describgrinya.
Bal Horta noloshyda ayan ka so hadlaya. Burrurti ba iga badnatay so labo carer ayan heesta oo subaxda iiga kaciya sarrirta markana salaada ba krusiga sitting roomka ba la ee fadisya marka la ee maydo oo ka soo baxo suliga. Markana, breakfast ba la isya markanaa kursigas bay ii fadisaa malinta oo daan daqaq ma ba sameenkaro cajissnimo iyo cidlo ban kujira. Habeenkana, bay carerko igo so garacaan albabka marka qolka ba ii igaysa. So markana hadan qof care ii samain kara tanni wa irin aad oo fican social service ban ka bexi laha oo qof xuryad leh ban ahan laha.
Maybe you're right sweetheart. Even I have to draw the line somewhere. I was okay when you told me that you were so overweight that it takes fifteen seconds for your baruur to stop jiggling after you stop walking, but not even I am this desperate. Social worker maa tiri? That's it walaal, the nikax is off.
 
Shit, If I were over 50 and still single I'd only have one option left. I would take my lacag and talents back home to the motherland and find me a pretty village girl willing to give an old man a chance. It's time to forget about your western lifestyle of decadence and seek out one of the best wonders of the world which is a Xalimo with a batty !

Good God, if I'm not grabbing Xalimo booty at least 3 days a week when I'm an oday I have failed in life. It's time to for redemption old man, go find your nomad princess !
You think I should import a barely legal cutie pie from Hargeysa? What if she becomes a feminist like @The Cushitic One and demands cuts to my ration of halal beer?

My Darood ancestors have a saying:

A feminist, a dog, and a walnut tree / The more you whip them, the better they be
 
You think I should import a barely legal cutie pie from Hargeysa? What if she becomes a feminist like @The Cushitic One and demands cuts to my ration of halal beer?

My Darood ancestors have a saying:

A feminist, a dog, and a walnut tree / The more you whip them, the better they be
The fobs aren't stupid yet you would
Get a naive 1950's xaalimo, if she's
Smart she will run away once she
Gets citizenship!

IMG_7398.GIF
 
Hortu, step numero uno.
Hadaad bidaar qabtid, iska xiir adeer. Amazon.com waxaad ka dhalabtaa Wahls, dakadaadu daba dhanyeer kadhig.
Lacagtaadi haysid, kusoo iibi shaatiyaal ku anfacdo dabeedna xarqaanta soomalida halagu soo tola cabirkaada. Matter of fact, maqaasintada dhan halagu tola.
Gymkii gal, badar calooshuda gaas ka kiciso isagadaa, qudaartaada garaac.
Intaasa kuu dhaanta inaad halkaan afka ku leerisid.
Taagero baa ku jooga halkaan ee bakhbakhdaadi ku ekow cammu
Very sound advice. There's no other option is there?
 

dr.leorio

death\emitter
You think I should import a barely legal cutie pie from Hargeysa? What if she becomes a feminist like @The Cushitic One and demands cuts to my ration of halal beer?

My Darood ancestors have a saying:

A feminist, a dog, and a walnut tree / The more you whip them, the better they be
Never import. If you bring her to the west she will leave you faster than you can say "bidaar wanagsan". The key is coming into a consensus before the marriage that you will not be bringing her overseas but you will provide for her and the future children. If she agrees and you have it written in the marriage contract then your golden but if you sell her dreams and end up marrying her anyway, her hatred and curse will lead you to an early grave (not that you have much years left anyway).

Either way old man, tread carefully and make our Darood ancestors proud!
 
The fobs aren't stupid yet you would
Get a naive 1950's xaalimo, if she's
Smart she will run away once she
Gets citizenship!

View attachment 26637
What's FOB? I hear it loads, but don't understand.

Xalimos are not smart. They are as thick as two planks of wood. You were made from a crooked rib because you're twisted. You oppress and deceive poor widdle men who just want some nipple. Why do you think Adam was created first? You guys need to be regulated because out of the crooked timber of womanhood, no straight thing was ever made.
 
Never import. If you bring her to the west she will leave you faster than you can say "bidaar wanagsan". The key is coming into a consensus before the marriage that you will not be bringing her overseas but you will provide for her and the future children. If she agrees and you have it written in the marriage contract then your golden but if you sell her dreams and end up marrying her anyway, her hatred and curse will lead you to an early grave (not that you have much years left anyway).

Either way old man, tread carefully and make our Darood ancestors proud!
Why can't he bring her here?

Why shouldn't she come to the
West and enjoy the trappings
Of marrying someone with
A foreign citizenship?

Yes keep her back home, so she's
Reliant upon him financially?
So she will put up with his shit.

Yes clever men indeed

:siilaanyosmile:
 

El padrone

Hedonist, Depressive realist, Existential nihilist
I shave My head bald cause I like the look plus its sexy

:manny:
Like i adviced some guys here before (forgot his nick), women def like balded heads. i used to shave bald and they would caress my head. it felt nice for them. also u know, shaved head feels rough and sturdy so when u rub it on their malab its extra macaaan apparently. ngl
 
What's FOB? I hear it loads, but don't understand.

Xalimos are not smart. They are as thick as two planks of wood. You were made from a crooked rib because you're twisted. You oppress and deceive poor widdle men who just want some nipple. Why do you think Adam was created first? You guys need to be regulated because out of the crooked timber of womanhood, no straight thing was ever made.
All men are good for is 2 things,
Procreation and to satisfy the primal
Needs.

We need to be regulated? You
Men need to be enslaved
And reprogrammed and than
Placed in dog pounds.

:fittytousand:
 
@dr.leorio

You're so right. Importing is a rookie's error. Gotta keep it as a long distance thing. Or she will make a break for it when she lands in the airport on the premise that God gave her tribe the biggest dick in the world so they can urinate on the rest and be free and strong. Subxanallah, what is the world coming to. Mix in some feminist propaganda from her girlfriends and its belly up for duqa. Gotta keep your eyes peeled these days.
 
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What's FOB? I hear it loads, but don't understand.

Xalimos are not smart. They are as thick as two planks of wood. You were made from a crooked rib because you're twisted. You oppress and deceive poor widdle men who just want some nipple. Why do you think Adam was created first? You guys need to be regulated because out of the crooked timber of womanhood, no straight thing was ever made.
You know damn well what FOB
Stands for FRESH OFF THE BOAT

:dabcasar: You are a funny lil man
 

dr.leorio

death\emitter
Why can't he bring her here?

Why shouldn't she come to the
West and enjoy the trappings
Of marrying someone with
A foreign citizenship?

Yes keep her back home, so she's
Reliant upon him financially?
So she will put up with his shit.

Yes clever men indeed

:siilaanyosmile:
You can bring her here if you want but chances are Mr.BidaarWanagsan will be left at the airport so I'm just giving him good advice. I have visited back home and the girls there only looked at me for my passport. There was a point where I looked like shit and had explosive diarrhea for a week; I couldn't move an inch without farting my guts out yet local girls would come to visit my Aunti only to shukansi and get info about marriage.

Did they know who I was? No
Did they actually care about my terrible health condition. No
Did they know I was American with a passport. YES

The point is the girls back home are sharks and will do/say anything for a free ticket to the West including getting married. Do I blame them for their lack of opportunities and financial situation? Absolutely not, I actually learned a very valuable lesson from them to always look out for myself and my future by running with the opportunities life presents you. So if @Bidaar Wanagsan is over 50, lonely, and single, why can't he look out for himself and get a young Xalimo that isn't indoctrinated in the western feminism disease? It's not even clever it's common sense at this point. God gives us freewill so we can make decisions on our own so if a Xalimo is willing to live @ home while being provided for, who are we to say if that's a bad choice or not?

@dr.leorio

You're so right. Importing is a rookie's error. Gotta keep it as a long distance thing. Or she will make a break for it when she lands in the airport on the premise that God gave her tribe the biggest dick in the world so they can urinate on the rest and be free and strong. Subxanallah, what is the world coming to. Mix in some feminist propaganda from her girlfriends and its belly up for duqa. Gotta keep your eyes peeled these days.
We are living in the end times where everything does not make sense and you cannot trust anything face value. Either keep it long distance with a Xalimo back home or try to find some desperate 30 something Xalimo or divorcee here. You have plenty of options my friend as women are beginning to outnumber men in this world!
 
You can bring her here if you want but chances are Mr.BidaarWanagsan will be left at the airport so I'm just giving him good advice. I have visited back home and the girls there only looked at me for my passport. There was a point where I looked like shit and had explosive diarrhea for a week; I couldn't move an inch without farting my guts out yet local girls would come to visit my Aunti only to shukansi and get info about marriage.

Did they know who I was? No
Did they actually care about my terrible health conditions. No
Did they know I was American with a passport. YES

The point is the girls back home are sharks and will do/say anything for a free ticket to the West including getting married. Do I blame them for their lack of opportunities and financial situation? Absolutely not, I actually learned a very valuable lesson from them to always look out for myself and my future by running with the opportunities life presents you. So if @Bidaar Wanagsan is over 50, lonely, and single, why can't he look out for himself and get a young Xalimo that isn't indoctrinated in the western feminism disease? It's not even clever it's common sense at this point. God gives us freewill so we can make decisions on our own so if a Xalimo is willing to live @ home while being provided for, who are we to say if that's a bad choice or not?



We are living in the end times where everything does not make sense and you cannot trust anything face value. Either keep it long distance with a Xalimo back home or try to find some desperate 30 something Xalimo or divorcee here. You have plenty of options my friend as women are beginning to outnumber men in this world!
Gospel truth.

People assume that guys my age should only be messing around with GILFs. If like me you didn't know what that stands for, young folks assure me it means: Grannies I'd Love To F**k. Talk about age discrimination. Sexism is bad, but ageism is okay? Apparently I can only sin with cougars.

I feel like this guy sometimes:

 
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