Dating For Old Somalis Is Tough

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As the years gallop on I think I may be turning somewhat ugly. Actually, switch that to very. This is no time for holding back. And to be honest I smell a bit too. I’m not proud of it brothers, but the truth must out.

The beauty in my life said “Uff” before she slammed the door on our five year relationship and skipped town with a handsome dog. I cry all night pausing only for prayer and beer. Alla jacaylka iyo wadnaha.

No pretty ankle wants to kiss me. The upscale brothels have shut their doors to my gleaming bidaar. The lowscale ones have turned me out. It’s tough being an old timer.

The looks go. The eyes dim. The organ of joy below the waist shrinks. What remains abtiyaal? Brains. But few women seek charmless nerds. The gentle sex want a buff hunk or, failing that, bags of moolah.

I am certain that for all my vast afflictions and sufferings that when, many years from now the heartache drops me and sends my imperishable soul up to the Choir Invisible, I will be rewarded by a just and intelligent God.

Till then my clansmen, what shall I do?
 

GodKnowsBest

Somaliweyn Unionist
This is a lie lol.

My dad is old and he was dating this one lady a year after my parents divorced (he's no longer dating the woman after the family learned and reacted in outrage). You just have weak game.
 

Benjamin

någon :)
As the years gallop on I think I may be turning somewhat ugly. Actually, switch that to very. This is no time for holding back. And to be honest I smell a bit too. I’m not proud of it brothers, but the truth must out.

The beauty in my life said “Uff” before she slammed the door on our five year relationship and skipped town with a handsome dog. I cry all night pausing only for prayer and beer. Alla jacaylka iyo wadnaha.

No pretty ankle wants to kiss me. The upscale brothels have shut their doors to my gleaming bidaar. The lowscale ones have turned me out. It’s tough being an old timer.

The looks go. The eyes dim. The organ of joy below the waist shrinks. What remains abtiyaal? Brains. But few women seek charmless nerds. The gentle sex want a buff hunk or, failing that, bags of moolah.

I am certain that for all my vast afflictions and sufferings that when, many years from now the heartache drops me and sends my imperishable soul up to the Choir Invisible, I will be rewarded by a just and intelligent God.

Till then my clansmen, what shall I do?
You need just to be more confident in yourself & lower your expectations for women. Don't just go with looks, look for other alternatives, like personality.

Just wait for the right one, there are 7.5 million people on earth., you won't be alone unless you give up.
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This is a lie lol.

My dad is old and he was dating this one lady a year after my parents divorced (he's no longer dating the woman after the family learned and reacted in outrage). You just have weak game.
Is your dad as visually unappealing as me? Send me his pic. Bet he's a real swain.
 

GodKnowsBest

Somaliweyn Unionist
Is your dad as visually unappealing as me? Send me his pic. Bet he's a real swain.
He's ugly to me (keep on mind he's old). You're smelly though? Lol. I'm guessing you're a fat loser too. No wonder women don't want you.

I'm only being this harsh because you said you drank, you show loserish characteristics, and you can't keep a woman.

If you weren't fat, if you worshipped God and didn't drink, and weren't such a loser this wouldn't happen to you.
 
You need just to be more confident in yourself & lower your expectations for women. Don't just go with looks, look for other alternatives, like personality.

Just wait for the right one, there are 7.5 million people on earth., you won't be alone unless you give up.
Lower my expectations in women? The hell does that mean? You want me to date hobos and crack *****s? Its precisely guys like you which make our lives needlessly difficult. Sick of the discrimination.

#OldLivesMatter
 
He's ugly to me (keep on mind he's old). You're smelly though? Lol. I'm guessing you're a fat loser too. No wonder women don't want you.

I'm only being this harsh because you said you drank, you show loserish characteristics, and you can't keep a woman.

If you weren't fat, if you worshipped God and didn't drink, and weren't such a loser this wouldn't happen to you.
No, I'm slim alhamdulilah. Only thing going for me. That's the upside of being a jaad chewer. It's an appetite suppressant.
 

Benjamin

någon :)
Lower my expectations in women? The hell does that mean? You want me to date hobos and crack *****s? Its precisely guys like you which make our lives needlessly difficult. Sick of the discrimination.

#OldLivesMatter
So you're blaming me for your loneliness now? Bisinka :jcoleno: I rather date an average looking xalimo then be depressed & miserable. :kanyeshrug:
 
So you're blaming me for your loneliness now? Bisinka :jcoleno: I rather date an average looking xalimo then be depressed & miserable. :kanyeshrug:
Mate, it's the average looking ones who look down on me. My last girlfriend was a 4 out of ten, and she left me on her fifty sixth birthday. I never even look at the fly girls. I keep my gaze chaste in the pub.
 

Gibiin-Udug

Crowned Queen of Puntland. Supporter of PuntExit
This is a lie lol.

My dad is old and he was dating this one lady a year after my parents divorced (he's no longer dating the woman after the family learned and reacted in outrage). You just have weak game.
Did he take her to quruxlow or to ihop for their date nights looool
 

Benjamin

någon :)
Mate, it's the average looking ones who look down on me. My last girlfriend was a 4 out of ten, and she left me on her fifty sixth birthday. I never even look at the fly girls. I keep my gaze chaste in the pub.
Wow you're over 50, I have to call you Adeer from this moment. I don't know what to say, just keep looking.
 
I must thank you for making me
Laugh, I don't laugh easily.

You have to love yourself first
And be confident, but not
Arrogant.

Your attitudes toward woman
Are disgusting no wonder
Even the brothels are turning
You away.

Buy a blow up sex doll.
 
I must thank you for making me
Laugh, I don't laugh easily.

You have to love yourself first
And be confident, but not
Arrogant.

Your attitudes toward woman
Are disgusting no wonder
Even the brothels are turning
You away.

Buy a blow up sex doll.
Such a rude advice. Even thought the OP is very rude himself.
 
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