Baby niece

So to cut this short and wrap it up my brothers wife gave birth two days ago. I have a few siblings and we’re quite a big family alhamdullilah. This is the first grandson btw. We went to his wife’s family home to visit the baby and see how she was doing today. She’s at her family home for a while you see as she’s just had a c section, it’s going to take some time for her to recover and heal her body miskeenta. Now fast forward to when I had her in my arms for the first time, I couldn’t hold back my tears and it takes a lot for me to cry as emotionally let’s just say I’m not all there. It just dawned on me then and there that I’m not going to see her as often as I want. When ur from the dads side of the family the bitter truth is wax aa meesha ka tahey maleh. Naturally your always around your mums side growing up and
I know it all depends on how strong your relationship with your brother is but the truth is in marriage the woman wears the trousers and what she says goes. I guess I’m just really upset I probably won’t be taking a active part in her life and this makes me really upset. He’s sent me a few videos and pictures of her, and every few minutes I see my self going on my camera roll to smile at them. Let’s just say my brothers wife is not so much of a friendly person. But regardless I’m not her parent so I need to back off and stop obsessing over her and know my boundaries as a edo. I wanna know if anyone else has ever been in this situation.
 
Visit whenever you want if you wanna see it grow up :mjdontkno:
I wish it were that easy. I kid you not his wife told me I can’t visit the baby as often as I want. she said she needs space and it could upset her if she sees new people everyday. “If you do choose to visit us make sure to call and set a time to come over”.... She must think I’m a dhadhan to believe that. She’s never liked me or my mum and it’s quite evident within her behaviour she doesn’t even hide it. I’ve also had many arguments with her and we’ve fell out numerous times.
 

Revolutionary

Just follow the day and reach for the sun!
I wish it were that easy. I kid you not his wife told me I can’t visit the baby as often as I want. she said she needs space and it could upset her if she sees people other than her parents. “If you do choose to visit us make sure to call and set a time to come over”.... She must think I’m a dhadhan to believe that. She’s never liked me or my mum and it’s quite evident within her behaviour she doesn’t even hide it. I’ve also had many arguments with her and we’ve fell out numerous times.
Aw that's sad, is there any chance you two can ever make up? Why would your brother marry a woman who doesn't like his mom or sister I don't understand
 
I wish it were that easy. I kid you not his wife told me I can’t visit the baby as often as I want. she said she needs space and it could upset her if she sees new people everyday. “If you do choose to visit us make sure to call and set a time to come over”.... She must think I’m a dhadhan to believe that. She’s never liked me or my mum and it’s quite evident within her behaviour she doesn’t even hide it. I’ve also had many arguments with her and we’ve fell out numerous times.
But if your family mistreated her if fight her, offcourse she is gonna distance herself
 
But if your family mistreated her if fight her, offcourse she is gonna distance herself
No ones mistreated her. We’ve welcomed her into our family with open arms and made her feel like she was a part of us. Ever since she fell pregnant she’s shown this horrible side to us.
 
So to cut this short and wrap it up my brothers wife gave birth two days ago. I have a few siblings and we’re quite a big family alhamdullilah. This is the first grandson btw. We went to his wife’s family home to visit the baby and see how she was doing today. She’s at her family home for a while you see as she’s just had a c section, it’s going to take some time for her to recover and heal her body miskeenta. Now fast forward to when I had her in my arms for the first time, I couldn’t hold back my tears and it takes a lot for me to cry as emotionally let’s just say I’m not all there. It just dawned on me then and there that I’m not going to see her as often as I want. When ur from the dads side of the family the bitter truth is wax aa meesha ka tahey maleh. Naturally your always around your mums side growing up and
I know it all depends on how strong your relationship with your brother is but the truth is in marriage the woman wears the trousers and what she says goes. I guess I’m just really upset I probably won’t be taking a active part in her life and this makes me really upset. He’s sent me a few videos and pictures of her, and every few minutes I see my self going on my camera roll to smile at them. Let’s just say my brothers wife is not so much of a friendly person. But regardless I’m not her parent so I need to back off and stop obsessing over her and know my boundaries as a edo. I wanna know if anyone else has ever been in this situation.
This was me when my niece was born. I don’t see her as much as I want to, but yes it’s sadly true that you are closer to your moms side then your fathers. Haha my sister in law is also not friendly and is low key a ***** tbh.
 

Mercury

Staff Member
Moderator
So to cut this short and wrap it up my brothers wife gave birth two days ago. I have a few siblings and we’re quite a big family alhamdullilah. This is the first grandson btw. We went to his wife’s family home to visit the baby and see how she was doing today. She’s at her family home for a while you see as she’s just had a c section, it’s going to take some time for her to recover and heal her body miskeenta. Now fast forward to when I had her in my arms for the first time, I couldn’t hold back my tears and it takes a lot for me to cry as emotionally let’s just say I’m not all there. It just dawned on me then and there that I’m not going to see her as often as I want. When ur from the dads side of the family the bitter truth is wax aa meesha ka tahey maleh. Naturally your always around your mums side growing up and
I know it all depends on how strong your relationship with your brother is but the truth is in marriage the woman wears the trousers and what she says goes. I guess I’m just really upset I probably won’t be taking a active part in her life and this makes me really upset. He’s sent me a few videos and pictures of her, and every few minutes I see my self going on my camera roll to smile at them. Let’s just say my brothers wife is not so much of a friendly person. But regardless I’m not her parent so I need to back off and stop obsessing over her and know my boundaries as a edo. I wanna know if anyone else has ever been in this situation.
I dont understand why your brother puts up with that behaviour the minute he notice his wife behave like that to his sister and family he should have a serious talk with her cause if he don't set a limit right away she's gonna keep acting like that or gradually get worse
 
So to cut this short and wrap it up my brothers wife gave birth two days ago. I have a few siblings and we’re quite a big family alhamdullilah. This is the first grandson btw. We went to his wife’s family home to visit the baby and see how she was doing today. She’s at her family home for a while you see as she’s just had a c section, it’s going to take some time for her to recover and heal her body miskeenta. Now fast forward to when I had her in my arms for the first time, I couldn’t hold back my tears and it takes a lot for me to cry as emotionally let’s just say I’m not all there. It just dawned on me then and there that I’m not going to see her as often as I want. When ur from the dads side of the family the bitter truth is wax aa meesha ka tahey maleh. Naturally your always around your mums side growing up and
I know it all depends on how strong your relationship with your brother is but the truth is in marriage the woman wears the trousers and what she says goes. I guess I’m just really upset I probably won’t be taking a active part in her life and this makes me really upset. He’s sent me a few videos and pictures of her, and every few minutes I see my self going on my camera roll to smile at them. Let’s just say my brothers wife is not so much of a friendly person. But regardless I’m not her parent so I need to back off and stop obsessing over her and know my boundaries as a edo. I wanna know if anyone else has ever been in this situation.
Bit judgemental no? Its only been days as you say and you're already making assumptions of how shes going to be in the future. I bet you and ya whole family telling eachother shes not gonna let you lot see the kid, shes a 6itch, talking about all the lil things shes done in the past you all didnt like etc typical somali behaviour. back biting this woman whos just given birth and you wanna make her seem bad. Go make ya own babies. This is how badmind somali parents think and pass it down to their kids like op.
 

SOULSEARCHING

Hakuna matata
VIP
Yes I haven't seen my nieces and nephews for almost a year now because of something similar.
Someone is getting her against your family and it's most likely her mother.
 
I’ve got the opposite problem
When I’m not working she wants me to look after my nephew
Even though her whole family is here
And when I refused
My brother tried saying I no longer love my nephew
So I had to cut both of them off
 

SOULSEARCHING

Hakuna matata
VIP
I’ve got the opposite problem
When I’m not working she wants me to look after my nephew
Even though her whole family is here
And when I refused
My brother tried saying I no longer love my nephew
So I had to cut both of them off
That's really toxic , you need time for yourself aswell.
But, it could be she likes you and trust's you with her children.
 

Halimo Supremist

Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good
VIP
I’ve got the opposite problem
When I’m not working she wants me to look after my nephew
Even though her whole family is here
And when I refused
My brother tried saying I no longer love my nephew
So I had to cut both of them off


Are we clones or something? I've had the same issues but avoided them when they came over. They'd pretend to make phone calls and disappear on me for hours because they're "tired".

But never had the decency to ask beforehand if I was willing to. I roasted them 1 too many times for this and they now mostly refuse my help.
 

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