28f Toronto Somali woman really struggling to make friends and find a husband

[Odious Delirium]

do you know any in MN? asking for a friend

im going into the tech industry myself but no i don't know any american tech bros. ill get back to you if i get acquainted with any

 

[AbdiFreedom]

Wown

Lol this is the type of behaviour I’m talking about. Just bare assumptions and my post was about finding a solution for myself. No where did I blame Somali men and for the record I didn’t talk to guys when I was younger because I believed it was haram to be too friendly with them. I was always respectful. When I was in uni the ratio was 1:4 guys to girls. The odds were not in my favour then. Furthermore, there are young women who feel the same way but they’re just more passive about it. When I asked for people to introduce me to guys I was 22/23 but I was told either a) that’s not our culture or b) your great you probably have so many guys throwing themselves at you.

Your problem is you're a recluse and still expect a husband. This is different from picky people. You just chose to not engage with anyone to the point that you even lost your own friends during the pandemic. These are two separate issues. If you put yourself out there in society, someone would have taken you.

 

[Yaraye]

im going into the tech industry myself but no i don't know any american tech bros. ill get back to you if i get acquainted with any

make sure to remember me when ever your somali tech friends/ colleague ask for a decent somali woman

 

[Basra]

im a shy guy myself i actually answered this in a thread i made way back ill send you the thread

 

[Odious Delirium]

 

[Bundasliga]

OP needs therapy .

 

[JackieBurkhart]

@mrlog, don't talk shit about me and then delete it. Wasn't this you the other day:

I am overtly aggressive
it’s a dog eat dog world
got xaniinyo waaweyn on the table 24/7

 

[Calaami]

I disagree with your claims here. I go to Starbucks and meet all of these Somali fob guys who are all running businesses, and some of them are millionaires. I have yet to see guys born or raised outscoring the FOB guys.

As for the sister, culture and compatibility may become an issue for her, but if he meets a brother with akhlaaq and willing their relationship to work, I think she should go for it irrespective of him being a fob or western-raised ones.

They’re a rarity bro. I volunteered extensively with job agencies during high school, simply put most Somali fobs brought to America by women don’t end up doing well. And if they do, it took them years to get there. If a Somali woman marries a fob man she has to accept she’ll be the provider for at least the first 5 years, if not more.

If she’s stay at home and relies on his income they’ll be living in poverty and pain. Facts.

 

[𐒋𐒖𐒆𐒔𐒖𐒕𐒈]

do you know any in MN? asking for a friend

There are not many, as I am yet to encounter any at conferences.

 

[Odious Delirium]

There are not many, as I am yet to encounter any at conferences.

What do most gen z somalis go into over there industry wise?

 

[𐒋𐒖𐒆𐒔𐒖𐒕𐒈]

What do most gen z somalis go into over there industry wise?

I am afraid I have not got the faintest idea, as I do not see many where I live. I hear of Nursing, and Public Health for the ladies, and Buss/Finances for the gents.

Postscript:
I hear many speak of wanting to join IT, but when it comes to it, they either do not have the grit, or could not be arsed for the drudge.

 

[3LetterzMM]

I’m in Toronto too abaayo lemme be ur lil friend

 

[Man with a garuun]

They’re a rarity bro. I volunteered extensively with job agencies during high school, simply put most Somali fobs brought to America by women don’t end up doing well. And if they do, it took them years to get there. If a Somali woman marries a fob man she has to accept she’ll be the provider for at least the first 5 years, if not more.

If she’s stay at home and relies on his income they’ll be living in poverty and pain. Facts.

All I see the fobs owning businesses and supporting 2 families: The ones in the West and the ones back home. So I disagree with you.

 

[Keep it a boqol]

Your problem is you're a recluse and still expect a husband. This is different from picky people. You just chose to not engage with anyone to the point that you even lost your own friends during the pandemic. These are two separate issues. If you put yourself out there in society, someone would have taken you.

Any tips for picky men and women?

 

[AbdiFreedom]

Any tips for picky men and women?

I'll PM you.

 

[Odious Delirium]

I'll PM you.

What would be considered picky tho? Where is the line between normal and reasonable requirements and picky/highly unrealistic ones in your opinion?

 

[Yaraye]

There are not many, as I am yet to encounter any at conferences.

That's odd. My younger male cousin who is currently is high school is planning on getting into that field. One of the biggest reasons why he got in was due to his older male dugsi friends convincing him. A lot of those male friends of his are in their early 20s and mid 20s.

 

[Odious Delirium]

That's odd. My younger male cousin who is currently is high school is planning on getting into that field. One of the biggest reasons why he got in was due to his older male dugsi friends convincing him. A lot of those male friends of his are in their early 20s and mid 20s.

I think the real reason is that a lot of these guys in that industry in general are more reclusive so probably aren't out and about intermingling with the general somali populous.
They probably spend there time on forums and stuff like that together.
I guess the middle ground between all somalis of all walks of life to meet is at the masjid.

 

[Odious Delirium]

Imagine telling your kids where you met their mother

Hey now don't hate it's definitely better than doing it on twitter or Instagram and any joke app out there.



They already have the platform now @Admin need to create a section with rules to keep it strict and serious for somalis exclusively and it would be taken just as seriously if not more seriously then any other platform.



Unlike most of these apps it has been around for a while so integrating it would definitely work and it would definitely improve the reputation of this site aswell. (For some reason everyone thinks this is an incel forum)



plus it will bring new types of people to the rest of the site which can potentially really change the site overall for the better



This would help a lot of people in the situation of @Ikranay And all those that complain about not being able to find any good somali men and women.

It will bring people from all walks of life in the community together which is the next best thing after the masjid for most and definitely the better option for the introverted/recursive types.

 

[Yaraye]

I think the real reason is that a lot of these guys in that industry in general are more reclusive so probably aren't out and about intermingling with the general somali populous.
They probably spend there time on forums and stuff like that together.
I guess the middle ground between all somalis of all walks of life to meet is at the masjid.

even in the masjid, they won't interact with any girls. vise versa. its extremely segregated