Xaliimo turns me down...says I am too somali

Sophisticate

Steel Magnolia
Staff Member
Moderator
Self-betterment is largely driven by outside incentive. He should definitely use it as motivation, but from the right people. Some random Xalimo getting picked up outside is not someone you should model yourself to.

I agree with the second part, that's one thing I'll never understand. Trying to pick up literal random girls in a shopping centre. Afaik that concept literally doesn't exist in Europe outside of maybe London. If there's no excuse for you to interact with her like on the train - you're going to come off as creepy most of the time. Even if I were to succeed, I'd be suspicious of the quality of what exactly I picked up.
True. A negative event could serve as a catalyst for change and external incentives can get the ball rolling but I hope he doesn't reenact a Rocky sequence with the "Eye of the Tiger" playing in the background visualizing a revenge body to get back at this random girl that he'll likely never see again.

For myself any sustained life change has often been precipitated not by self-doubt or feelings of insecurity (though I could see this as working to get one moving). For instance, going to the gym wouldn't be to quell feelings of inadequacy (from but one encounter) but from the benefits accrued from feeling better than one's baseline. It's just a thought. Sure there are obviously external rewards like positive feedback, increased feelings of self-assuredness, increased levels of physical attractiveness and so forth.

It's kind of amusing that he approached because she was Somali assuming he'd have an easier time at linking up but it blew up in his face. We often assume random passersby that engage with us without reason are a little batty.
 

BobSmoke

I know what you're thinking about
You don't need to focus on your betterment or self-care just to appeal to someone. Do that for you only. And why do you care about what a random person thinks of you.

I seriously don't understand why men approach women they don't know. It's very random. And women won't trust you unless you are familiar or are cosigned by their friends (social proof) which works wonders to influence behavior. Also, you probably didn't have the best of intentions shooting your shot indiscriminately just because of appearance alone. The probability of your success would be low.

Her saying you're too Somali might be a sign of self-hate ensured you never came back to talk to her again (so it might have had the desired effect). Even though it was in poor taste and sounded immature but I suppose that's what you get when you just one criteria.
You already know what I'm bout to say:yousmart:
 
True. A negative event could serve as a catalyst for change and external incentives can get the ball rolling but I hope he doesn't reenact a Rocky sequence with the "Eye of the Tiger" playing in the background visualizing a revenge body to get back at this random girl that he'll likely never see again.

For myself any sustained life change has often been precipitated not by self-doubt or feelings of insecurity (though I could see this as working to get one moving). For instance, going to the gym wouldn't be to quell feelings of inadequacy (from but one encounter) but from the benefits accrued from feeling better than one's baseline. It's just a thought. Sure there are obviously external rewards like positive feedback, increased feelings of self-assuredness, increased levels of physical attractiveness and so forth.

It's kind of amusing that he approached because she was Somali assuming he'd have an easier time at linking up but it blew up in his face. We often assume random passersby that engage with us without reason are a little batty.
A little batty? I would've thought the opposite.

I agree with your other statement though. I think it's especially hard when you're Somali because for some reason I feel like Somali women have trouble disassociating an individual Somali guy from their own preconceived notions of Somali men. Everything is viewed from a certain lense. Good for hum for having the confidence and the desire though.
 
a lot of Somalis are like this especially the ones born in the west. in public, they only want to talk to ajanabis
 

Guardafui

Beati Pacifici.
Looool the calaacal of this thread if one girl doesn’t find you interesting then go for another one there’s literally billions of women on earth not every girl will find you interesting or attractive that’s life get used to it.
 
I wish it was a dream...I even spotted her a few days after and she gave me this look like "this nigga going to approach me again" :pachah1::russ::lolbron:

Persistence can pay off though and you should try few more times. Most women like the seriously interested guy even if at first they reject him. That selfish ego and self importance kicks in and they forget their useless prior objections. I bet you are now her favorite jokes and sheeko with her girlfriends. You come up often for laughs. But that can reverse and you may have the last laugh,

Don't give up. She looks fine. I would rather see a Abdi own that Baruur than another nonsomali guy. Best of Luck Brother. Keep at it.
 
True. Somalis born in Somalia actively seek other Somalis out while the ones born here avoid each other.
I noticed that woith habesha women too. The words born back home stick with their own...while the ones born in west refuse to date habesha men :deadrose:
 
I noticed that woith habesha women too. The words born back home stick with their own...while the ones born in west refuse to date habesha men :deadrose:
Because they want to be fucked by these hideous looking violent Jamaican and Bantu men. You have to talk like one, and dress like one, and I guarantee you that you will get free pussy being thrown at you after listening to my advice.
 
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They want to be fucked by these hideous looking violent Jamaican and Bantu men. You have to talk like one, and dress like one and I guarantee you that you will get pussy after listening to my advice.
As much as women like saying they like handsome men... some do want do get fucked by physically unappealing but alpha men. Its like the beauty and the beast thing
 
You must be rocking it all from the majo 10 head to the barkhad nutella buck teeth if you getting cucked like that in your dreams
64F420EC-AB15-4FB4-8059-4C4C507056E7.gif
 

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