Why do Somali mothers baby their sons

[Baarisiyomoos]

My mum was and still is equally strict. My dad is worse, I can spend the whole day doing chores but my man will come back from work and tell me to take out the bins before he has sat down. That man loves giving me chores.

I am grateful tho. I learnt how to cook, clean and do other basic chores. I have seen some ajnabi people that are unable to make 2 minute noodles.

That’s solid man You’re better off than 99% of Somali guys

 

[Baarisiyomoos]

Babying your son is gonna make him weak irresponsible,lazy and cripple him from being a functioning adult to relying on others to do basic needs for him

It's embarrasing to see grown guys waiting on their wife to cook them a meal or wash their dirty clothes

Agreed 100%

 

[Mercury]

Agreed 100%

what's even more embarrassing is seeing guys who are 18-22 having their little baby sister cooking food for them while shes 12-13 you will see this alot back home

 

[Farahslayer]

I don't know about diaspora somalis but back home, it's a taboo for men to cook or do laundry. Single men live in their parents home or with 1 of their married brothers/cousins. My 65+ year old childless uncle lives with his brother's family. I have another middle aged cousin who also lives with my other uncles family. Basically, whether Somali men have a wife or not, they are taken care of by their female in-laws or related women.

They really think I’m lying or exaggerating. It’s very odd because unmarried women are expected to earn $$ and cook for themselves so the tradition only goes one way .

Hell sometimes they’re expected to financially support a brother/cousin who isn’t doing financially well or is lazy.

The culture is so weird and I can never understand why these ladies put up with this madness!

 

[Baarisiyomoos]

what's even more embarrassing is seeing guys who are 18-22 having their little baby sister cooking food for them while shes 12-13 you will see this alot back home

Seen this with my cousins in Nairobi. Embarrassing wallahi

 

[bluebird]

the inc**t thing is going too far. somali mothers have normal mother-son relationships, they're just unusually cold towards their daughters, so I can see how they look overly affectionate to their sons in comparison

 

[AbrahamFreedom]

It will get worse. Mothers do even more for their sons when they come for a visit after leaving the nest.

 

[Mercury]

They really think I’m lying or exaggerating. It’s very odd because unmarried women are expected to earn $$ and cook for themselves so the tradition only goes one way .

Hell sometimes they’re expected to financially support a brother/cousin who isn’t doing financially well or is lazy.

The culture is so weird and I can never understand why these ladies put up with this madness!

another thing I've seen alot back home is when the wife give birth and her body needs to recover the husband will get a maid or a female relative sister,cousin etc to come and look after the house the cooking,cleaning which is dumb and embarrassing imagine you can't look after your own wife when she is resting

Imagine if the roles where reversed the husband is hurt and is resting to make sure he recovers and the wife calls her female relatives to take care of him because she don't know how-to cook or clean

 

[akaA2]

I don't know about diaspora somalis but back home, it's a taboo for men to cook or do laundry. Single men live in their parents home or with 1 of their married brothers/cousins. My 65+ year old childless uncle lives with his brother's family. I have another middle aged cousin who also lives with my other uncles family. Basically, whether Somali men have a wife or not, they are taken care of by their female in-laws or related women.

Me being in somalia, i saw one of my cousins tryna knock out his sister for refusing to wash his shirt. Had to intervene before her pretty face got f'd up.

Had another cousin at baadiyo who has a crippled 3 year old, she made casho after we got done milking the cows. Another one of my distant cousin came to my ayeeyo with food asking my ayeeyo to tell her grand daughter(my real ina hooyo). To make food again at around 10pm. Ayeeyo with no mercy says get up. I told her to sif where she was and had to tell off my ayeeyo kindly that this isnt fair. Told the dude rudely that he can make his own food. It was so serious that i had to like threaten him with an ak-47 i borrowed from my cousin.

Look im a lil toxic at times but one thing i dont do is treat my female first cousins like shaqaalo and men in somalia have a tendacy of treating their females like slaves whether its their sisters or wives.

I can be a lil 'fuxk these mali girls' online but to my wife(who is somali) 'im an angel'
Have some compassion for the women in your life. You will be treated like a king without demanding it.

 

[akaA2]

another thing I've seen alot back home is when the wife give birth and her body needs to recover the husband will get a maid or a female relative sister,cousin etc to come and look after the house the cooking,cleaning which is dumb and embarrassing imagine you can't look after your own wife when she is resting

Imagine if the roles where reversed the husband is hurt and is resting to make sure he recovers and the wife calls her female relatives to take care of him because she don't know how-to cook or clean

How is it embarrassing? The ones that love their wives actually get them a maid. Ive seen guys who dont do that so, what youre suggesting is actually too much.

 

[Mercury]

How is it embarrassing? The ones that love their wives actually get them a maid. Ive seen guys who dont do that so, what youre suggesting is actually too much.

they don't do it out of love if it was out of love they would themselves be taking care of the house,clothes and making the food for their wife only reason they getting a maid or relative to come help them out is for someone to help em otherwise the house gonna be a mess and they gonna be starving whats embarrassing is to call someone for help when its basic life skills that anyone can learn

 

[Baarisiyomoos]

Me being in somalia, i saw one of my cousins tryna knock out his sister for refusing to wash his shirt. Had to intervene before her pretty face got f'd up.

Had another cousin at baadiyo who has a crippled 3 year old, she made casho after we got done milking the cows. Another one of my distant cousin came to my ayeeyo with food asking my ayeeyo to tell her grand daughter(my real ina hooyo). To make food again at around 10pm. Ayeeyo with no mercy says get up. I told her to sif where she was and had to tell off my ayeeyo kindly that this isnt fair. Told the dude rudely that he can make his own food. It was so serious that i had to like threaten him with an ak-47 i borrowed from my cousin.

Look im a lil toxic at times but one thing i dont do is treat my female first cousins like shaqaalo and men in somalia have a tendacy of treating their females like slaves whether its their sisters or wives.

I can be a lil 'fuxk these mali girls' online but to my wife(who is somali) 'im an angel'
Have some compassion for the women in your life. You will be treated like a king without demanding it.

Good man We need more men like you in the community

 

[akaA2]

they don't do it out of love if it was out of love they would themselves be taking care of the house,clothes and making the food for their wife only reason they getting a maid or relative to come help them out is for someone to help em otherwise the house gonna be a mess and they gonna be starving whats embarrassing is to call someone for help when its basic life skills that anyone can learn

Bro adi raga baagamuudo inee yihiin miyaa umoodaa. Guys go out there and work for a living.
Somalia aint a 1st world country. People dont get salaries like we do in the west. There is no 9-5. They work long long hours with little money.
Only a guy who is well off can afford to be at home always. Knowing u went to somalia id expect u to know better. I used to cook and clean even when my sisters were around atleast for myself its normal to us but back home it aint normal as much as you'd like to rationalize it is.

 

[Mercury]

Bro adi raga baagamuudo inee yihiin miyaa umoodaa. Guys go out there and work for a living.
Somalia aint a 1st world country. People dont get salaries like we do in the west. There is no 9-5. They work long long hours with little money.
Only a guy who is well off can afford to be at home always. Knowing u went to somalia id expect u to know better. I used to cook and clean even when my sisters were around atleast for myself its normal to us but back home it aint normal as much as you'd like to rationalize it is.

you don't need to live in a 1st world country or have a high salary to help in your own home early in the morning before going to work you could make your own bed,fold your clothes,iron em and prepare your own breakfast and do your own laundry on your off days and you would be contributing to the household whats normalized here is being lazy and the man feeling entitled to have shit done for him

You could work long hours and still do all those things I listed its all about priorities and managing your time

 

[so_wavey]

What is the point of marriage if a wife is going to act like anther man who wears trousers? might as well get a roommate

 

[akaA2]

you don't need to live in a 1st world country or have a high salary to help in your own home early in the morning before going to work you could make your own bed,fold your clothes,iron em and prepare your own breakfast and do your own laundry on your off days and you would be contributing to the household whats normalized here is being lazy and the man feeling entitled to have shit done for him

You could work long hours and still do all those things I listed its all about priorities and managing your time

What youre willing to do the next man with a wife isnt.

 

[Mercury]

What youre willing to do the next man with a wife isnt.

im just saying whats normalized here is the man is treated like a baby that needs to be looked after

 

[Baarisiyomoos]

What is the point of marriage if a wife is going to act like anther man who wears trousers? might as well get a roommate

What’s the point of marriage if a husband will act like a 10 year old son? Might as well just get a sperm donor.

 

[Mercury]

What is the point of marriage if a wife is going to act like anther man who wears trousers? might as well get a roommate

if shes wearing the trousers than it means you're aint doing your job and you're lacking in certain areas that are important

 

[Xaruun]

What is the point of marriage if a wife is going to act like anther man who wears trousers? might as well get a roommate

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