Why do men stare @ me?

Read the full post before judging me. For context, I’m a hijabi. I dress pretty modestly, I wear pants and really baggy long shirts most of the time. If not that, I’m wearing a hoodie. Also I never wear colour just black or grey.

My parents are really busy these days and since I’m 19 now, they expect me to contribute by going grocery shopping and running other errands for them. But now I don’t really feel like doing that anymore because men make me uncomfortable.

Somali men and adeers are pretty respectful. They’ll look at you once, they might even say hi and carry on. Madow men on the other hand do some next level shit. On three occasions in the past month, when I’m walking alone in the parking lot they’ve slowed down there cars next to me just to look at me and smile. One time this Haitian guy rolled down his window to talk to me and I just ran away. Yesterday I was a bit tired so I decided to go get a drink and sit in the food court. This Madow guy sat at a table in front of me and was on his phone but kept staring at me as he spoke on the phone. Then he got up to leave and winked at me wtf.

Last week I was helping a disabled Somali lady organize her garage and I was throwing something out in the dumpster near her house. These two Arab taxi drivers ( they were in two separate cars) slow down and wave at me then motion for me to come to them. Mind you this was on a small narrow street so there were many cars behind them honking for them to keep going. They ignored it though and kept motioning for me to come to them. I ignored them then ran back to the woman’s house and when I looked back they were still there waving.

What do you guys think I should do? It makes me super uncomfortable. I literally have a heart attack everytime I’m walking alone and some random Madow or other fob slows down to look or talk to me. I know I might sound overdramatic but there have been a lot of kidnappings and sex trafficking cases in my region which makes me worry even more. I wear no colour and I wear a hijab so things like this don’t happen to me yet they still happen. Now I’m too scared to go outside with a friend or a cousin. Any advice? Should I start wearing a niqab?
 
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Boqorada

I Was Cheating In Prison..I Was Cheating ...
It comes with the territory unfortunately. These animals are predators they think it's their right to harass women and get defensive when you call them out on their degenerate behaviour. Have you told your parents you don't feel comfortable going out alone?
 
It comes with the territory unfortunately. These animals are predators they think it's their right to harass women and get defensive when you call them out on their degenerate behaviour. Have you told your parents you don't feel comfortable going out alone?
Yes my parents are very nice and they’re understanding. But they tell me I have to be confident and stop letting men make me scared because they’ll pick up on my fear...so now I go grocery shopping with my cousins but sometimes they harass them too💀💀
 
From what you’ve said, they must just find you very pretty/attractive based on your face since you said you dress modest.
It’s quite crazy that some disgusting men people can’t respect hijab as even if they did find you pretty, they should leave you alone anyway.

despite men being gross you should be able to leave whenever you need to, you shouldn’t let them make you not want to come out.

I think you’re dealing with it well, I understand it’s dangerous and causes you to feel vulnerable, so make sure when you leave the house read ayatul-kursi and the dua when you leave the house always. If you want extra protection read adkar before you leave too. Insha’allah you’ll be fine.

Continue to try to get someone to go with you sometimes, but if not do what you need to do still. The truth is you can’t always have people with you. In life there’s things you have to do alone anyway, just don’t be scared of it, put your trust in allah
 
Let's be honest, it kind of goes both ways. If you're half way decent looking and have a Islamic-ish beard, hijabis will eye-fúck you just as much lol. Somali girls are biggest offenders :manny:
 
From what you’ve said, they must just find you very pretty/attractive based on your face since you said you dress modest.
It’s quite crazy that some disgusting men people can’t respect hijab as even if they did find you pretty, they should leave you alone anyway.

despite men being gross you should be able to leave whenever you need to, you shouldn’t let them make you not want to come out.

I think you’re dealing with it well, I understand it’s dangerous and causes you to feel vulnerable, so make sure when you leave the house read ayatul-kursi and the dua when you leave the house always. If you want extra protection read adkar before you leave too. Insha’allah you’ll be fine.

Continue to try to get someone to go with you sometimes, but if not do what you need to do still. The truth is you can’t always have people with you. In life there’s things you have to do alone anyway, just don’t be scared of it, put your trust in allah
Thanks love. Alhamdullilah recently my family started doing daily dua recitations and reading ayatul kursi together and it feels great. You’re right I won’t let it affect me but you know it’s still pretty scary. 12 year old girls and grannies have been getting kidnapped and sold...you’d think the hijab would make ppl leave you alone but no...anyways thanks for your advice❤️❤️God bless you
 

Molotoff

Supreme Bosniak Geeljire
VIP
I bet you wouldn't mind if you found the guys checking you out attractive.

When a sub 8 male compliments or flirts with a woman, he is sick and gross, but when chad does its perfectly fine.
 
I bet you wouldn't mind if you found the guys checking you out attractive.

When a sub 8 male compliments or flirts with a woman, he is sick and gross, but when chad does its perfectly fine.
No that’s not true when attractive cadaan guys at school start flirting with me and asking me weird shit I start reciting the Quran under my breath...the truth is some people don’t like attention I just mind my business and like to be left alone...not everyone is like a Kardashian and thrives off attention. I think it’s weird
 
Read the full post before judging me. For context, I’m a hijabi. I dress pretty modestly, I wear pants and really baggy long shirts most of the time. If not that, I’m wearing a hoodie. Also I never wear colour just black or grey.

My parents are really busy these days and since I’m 19 now, they expect me to contribute by going grocery shopping and running other errands for them. But now I don’t really feel like doing that anymore because men make me uncomfortable.

Somali men and adeers are pretty respectful. They’ll look at you once, they might even say hi and carry on. Madow men on the other hand do some next level shit. On three occasions in the past month, when I’m walking alone in the parking lot they’ve slowed down there cars next to me just to look at me and smile. One time this Haitian guy rolled down his window to talk to me and I just ran away. Yesterday I was a bit tired so I decided to go get a drink and sit in the food court. This Madow guy sat at a table in front of me and was on his phone but kept staring at me as he spoke on the phone. Then he got up to leave and winked at me wtf.

Last week I was helping a disabled Somali lady organize her garage and I was throwing something out in the dumpster near her house. These two Arab taxi drivers ( they were in two separate cars) slow down and wave at me then motion for me to come to them. Mind you this was on a small narrow street so there were many cars behind them honking for them to keep going. They ignored it though and kept motioning for me to come to them. I ignored them then ran back to the woman’s house and when I looked back they were still there waving.

What do you guys think I should do? It makes me super uncomfortable. I literally have a heart attack everytime I’m walking alone and some random Madow or other fob slows down to look or talk to me. I know I might sound overdramatic but there have been a lot of kidnappings and sex trafficking cases in my region which makes me worry even more. I wear no colour and I wear a hijab so things like this don’t happen to me yet they still happen. Now I’m too scared to go outside with a friend or a cousin. Any advice? Should I start wearing a niqab?
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Bundasliga

El Prezidento league de bunda
Read the full post before judging me. For context, I’m a hijabi. I dress pretty modestly, I wear pants and really baggy long shirts most of the time. If not that, I’m wearing a hoodie. Also I never wear colour just black or grey.

My parents are really busy these days and since I’m 19 now, they expect me to contribute by going grocery shopping and running other errands for them. But now I don’t really feel like doing that anymore because men make me uncomfortable.

Somali men and adeers are pretty respectful. They’ll look at you once, they might even say hi and carry on. Madow men on the other hand do some next level shit. On three occasions in the past month, when I’m walking alone in the parking lot they’ve slowed down there cars next to me just to look at me and smile. One time this Haitian guy rolled down his window to talk to me and I just ran away. Yesterday I was a bit tired so I decided to go get a drink and sit in the food court. This Madow guy sat at a table in front of me and was on his phone but kept staring at me as he spoke on the phone. Then he got up to leave and winked at me wtf.

Last week I was helping a disabled Somali lady organize her garage and I was throwing something out in the dumpster near her house. These two Arab taxi drivers ( they were in two separate cars) slow down and wave at me then motion for me to come to them. Mind you this was on a small narrow street so there were many cars behind them honking for them to keep going. They ignored it though and kept motioning for me to come to them. I ignored them then ran back to the woman’s house and when I looked back they were still there waving.

What do you guys think I should do? It makes me super uncomfortable. I literally have a heart attack everytime I’m walking alone and some random Madow or other fob slows down to look or talk to me. I know I might sound overdramatic but there have been a lot of kidnappings and sex trafficking cases in my region which makes me worry even more. I wear no colour and I wear a hijab so things like this don’t happen to me yet they still happen. Now I’m too scared to go outside with a friend or a cousin. Any advice? Should I start wearing a niqab?
Ngl that sound scary af ,i assume you from the uk & i think the men over there don't make a difference between hijabis & non hijabis . You need to talk to your parents & have your guard up all the time, i can't belive even hijabis arent safe anymore
 
Thanks love. Alhamdullilah recently my family started doing daily dua recitations and reading ayatul kursi together and it feels great. You’re right I won’t let it affect me but you know it’s still pretty scary. 12 year old girls and grannies have been getting kidnapped and sold...you’d think the hijab would make ppl leave you alone but no...anyways thanks for your advice❤❤God bless you
Mash’allah, you’ll be good. You too
 
Sorry you have to go through this :(

My younger sister too who was 16 at the time (!!!!) also confided to me about this same problem 2 years ago with men in public acting creepy/stalking. I never let her take the bus from then and always made sure me or my other siblings take her to from school, but still this is fucking disgusting.

Sis, these guys are NO GOOD. they only see you as vulnerable/inexperienced and are trying to prey on you.

If I can give you ONE advise it will be: DO NOT TRY TO BE 'NICE'. Some men know women are usually nice and use it against them to push boundaries as far as possible, you need to shut that shit down quick.

Look these dudes in the eyes with anger/fierceness and tell em to F OFF.

From what you’ve said, they must just find you very pretty/attractive based on your face since you said you dress modest.
It’s quite crazy that some disgusting men people can’t respect hijab as even if they did find you pretty, they should leave you alone anyway.

they don't even need to be attractive, so many desperate dudes out here today they'll go for anything that looks 18 🤢
 
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