WHY are Somali men between 30-34...

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Speaking of polygamy and what's Haram usually when the husband wants a second wife the first wife doesn't agree to it so they divorce he goes marries the new wife

And here's the thing and it's common in the Somali community when he divorced the first one for a new wife he stops seeing his kids and providing for them

And islamically you must provide for all your kids wether divorced or not
I don’t see why you’re telling me this? Did I disagree? Go clean the dishes or do your make up abaayo.
 

Mercury

Ha igu daalinee dantaada raac
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I don’t see why you’re telling me this? Did I disagree? Go clean the dishes or do your make up abaayo.
I'm just stating a fact maybe you didn't disagree but there's many that use the deen to justify their actions of getting a second wife

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I prefer monogamy, but out of consideration for my wife, I will space out my children so she doesn’t have to suffer from giving birth so much. It really takes a toll on you. And even if I did want a lot of wives(I don’t), it’s a Sunnah and a husbands right. What Allah makes haram, none can make halal, and what Allah makes halal, none can make haram. :)

Fair enough. Lol

Just don't ever tell your future wife what you shared with us in your previous post.
 

Gambar

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She’s 28 probably turning 29 soon, which is very old. In the UK you finish university at 21 years old, meaning she has 7 years of work experience? Why do you need to wait 7 years after getting your degree to get married? Why would a 22 year old be bird brained? My mother got married at age 16, my ayeeyo gave BIRTH at 13. The fact that you only view women nearing their menopause age(natural fertility decreases at 30 years old) as mature is despicable!


What our Prophet saw recommended us is to get married YOUNG(which in his time would have been 13-17 let alone 35 year olds acudubillah), which this girl repeatedly has mocked.

There is no difference in my opinion between a careeist feminist women who wants to be independent and a BLM SJW women. So the only difference between a 35 year old and a 20 year old cursed with these ideologies would be AGE. And I sincerely doubt that a 35 year old women raised in the west would be able to keep their dignity and honor, when we have 12 year olds losing their virginity in the West. Do you really think such a woman would also accept traditional Islamic gender roles when it goes against her life she’s been living for decades?

No women should delay her marriage past 18-21. This is my personal opinion, and it may be that you prefer a careerist women who chases materialism over family so each to their own.
Very old? Loooooool how old are you, 12? You come across kind of childish with that statement.

If 29 is very old, how old is 40, the age of Khadija when she married the rasool saws?
 
Very old? Loooooool how old are you, 12? You come across kind of childish with that statement.

If 29 is very old, how old is 40, the age of Khadija when she married the rasool saws?
I meant 29 is very old for your first marriage, Khadija was a divorcee. I would rather marry a divorcee who is 29 than a 29 year old whose never been married.
 
Very old? Loooooool how old are you, 12? You come across kind of childish with that statement.

If 29 is very old, how old is 40, the age of Khadija when she married the rasool saws?

Although a common belief there is no evidence for her being that age, the strongest opinion is that she was in her late 20's according to the hadiths.

I don't blame the OP as she grew up in a orphan household and she had to be the breadwinner since she doesn't have brothers that are around her age or older (assuming), her case is rare and understandable.

But her ideas even at 27 are inexcusable, this unfortunately is even a bigger turnoff then her age to the type of men she is seeking, she mentioned her desire for a religious male but posted pictures of metrosexual feminine looking irreligious males with the caption "why can't they be like them".

She is very confused and because she grew up as an orphan I have a lot of sympathy. This is why our ancient ancestors coined the proverb " Your son's/daughter's need you most when you pick their mother"

A strong religious mother would never be comfortable with her daughter walking around without a Hijab, all hell would break loose in that household, it's the mothers who enforce the Hijab rules just like they enforce FGM in our communities, the fathers have nothing to do with this.

It's ironic because it should be the father enforcing Hijab/Modesty but it's always the mother that does it.
 
You are confused bratha - I'm not disputing the logic of any of what you wrote. The problem is you're trying to wedge a square peg into a round hole.

20 year olds in the UK (and probably elsewhere) have infant brains and don't understand the concept of responsibility... at all. Hence why the divorce rate is so bloody high. You are advocating practices ideal for healthy environments, where puberty is seen as step into man/womanhood. Just stop and look who you are using as examples - your GRANNY.

You can't have your cake and eat it. If you want to follow healthy Islamic guidelines like marrying young, Islamic family dynamics, etc. then you have to leave literally Satan's asshole where you currently reside. I used to think there was a middle ground, where you can follow all the guidelines to a tee and still reside here, but there really isn't. Look around you - all of us who live out here are poisoned and far from from ideal, including the males. Either be cognizant of the severe limitations we have here and be pragmatic, or move. There is no middle-ground.

A 27 year old educated Somali lady may be old by those correct standards, but if we are speaking relatively, they are an asset in 2017 UK if only she fears her Lord. Scratch that, any woman whatever age who has a relationship with Allah is gold.


Your right the 17-22 growing up today in the diaspora 90% of them have the mentalities of an infant, a lot of it has to do with society and dumb parents that never equipped them with any wisdom's.

Those that marry around those ages and experience high divorce rates marry equally dumb dudes they fetched off the streets around the same age (room mate), which has a 95% chance of failing.

For any chance of success there needs to be at least 7 year age gap minimum and that dude needs to have a lot of patience, I say +7 not only because of maturity reasons but psychological as well, you are more likely to respect an older person then a person of the same age, and that older person can relate to the dhocilnimo at that age.

But as I always maintained and as you so eloquently put it! there is no chance in hell if you want to follow Islamic guidelines and save your offspring to be staying here, you have to LEAVE this place, because the wider society will over power you regardless.
 

Gambar

VIP
Although a common belief there is no evidence for her being that age, the strongest opinion is that she was in her late 20's according to the hadiths.

I don't blame the OP as she grew up in a orphan household and she had to be the breadwinner since she doesn't have brothers that are around her age or older (assuming), her case is rare and understandable.

But her ideas even at 27 are inexcusable, this unfortunately is even a bigger turnoff then her age to the type of men she is seeking, she mentioned her desire for a religious male but posted pictures of metrosexual feminine looking irreligious males with the caption "why can't they be like them".

She is very confused and because she grew up as an orphan I have a lot of sympathy. This is why our ancient ancestors coined the proverb " Your son's/daughter's need you most when you pick their mother"

A strong religious mother would never be comfortable with her daughter walking around without a Hijab, all hell would break loose in that household, it's the mothers who enforce the Hijab rules just like they enforce FGM in our communities, the fathers have nothing to do with this.

It's ironic because it should be the father enforcing Hijab/Modesty but it's always the mother that does it.
Why are you still ranting about her? She left.
 

Leila

Wanaag iyo Dhiig kar
Since when is 27 old?

Here in the U.K most Somali women get married between 22 and 30, I'm 27 and getting married in 4 months time insha allah and my fiancé is 6 years older than me. Most of my cousins/ friends have been married around that age . Also getting married at 20 nowadays is unrealistic especially for men most people are still in education and working to save money.

And to the girl who posted this topic wearing hijab is wajib but you have to put your trust allah read Duas every time when you leave your house. Provision only comes from Allah !
 

DuctTape

I have an IQ of 300
Fucking hell, @Lsma is such an unlikeable user.
One minute you're toxic female user putting the men down, and the next you're a toxic male user putting the women down.
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I think they’ve just genuinely always been ugly. It’s rare seeing a good looking Somali guy who isn’t mixed. I could be wrong maybe it’s just the uk
 
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