The struggles of recently divorced Somali women

[Don]

I was raised in a single mother household and so was many of my close somali friends. We moved all around the UK before settling in the north, and my mother struggled to take care of us. Now she's living comfortably while all my siblings send her lacag every month! Put my story aside this is an epidemic in the somali community that cannot be overlooked! It should not be that easy to call off a marriage. Somali men should look at the consequences of raising kids in a broken home and think with their heads, not with their sex organ. Like @Nin-culus says, look at the bigger picture please!!!

 

[Basra]

I was raised in a single mother household and so was many of my close somali friends. We moved all around the UK before settling in the north, and my mother struggled to take care of us. Now she's living comfortably while all my siblings send her lacag every month! Put my story aside this is an epidemic in the somali community that cannot be overlooked! It should not be that easy to call off a marriage. Somali men should look at the consequences of raising kids in a broken home and think with their heads, not with their sex organ. Like @Nin-culus says, look at the bigger picture please!!!

Whats the point of your thread? it seems like there is a happy ending in your family. why the cautionary omen tone????

 

[Nin-culus]

I was raised in a single mother household and so was many of my close somali friends. We moved all around the UK before settling in the north, and my mother struggled to take care of us. Now she's living comfortably while all my siblings send her lacag every month! Put my story aside this is an epidemic in the somali community that cannot be overlooked! It should not be that easy to call off a marriage. Somali men should look at the consequences of raising kids in a broken home and think with their heads, not with their sex organ. Like @Nin-culus says, look at the bigger picture please!!!

There are no limits. Think big, set plans, execute. With Allah swt on your side anything’s possible

Apply this to acquiring lacag, business moves, with your wife.



You a Laangaab for life though

 

[HalimaJ]

Walal, what makes you think these men will have naxaaris for random Somali women when they have no naxaaris for their hooyos.


Most here are raised by single mothers.

 

[Don]

Whats the point of your thread? it seems like there is a happy ending in your family. why the cautionary omen tone????

I am one of the lucky ones abayo macaan. Many end up on the streets because they have no father figure to put some sense into them. My hoyo played both roles alhamdullilah

 

[Nin-culus]

 

[Nin-culus]

Walal, what makes you think these men will have naxaaris for random Somali women when they have no naxaaris for their hooyos.


Most here are raised by single mothers.

Your making assumptions my mom is queen in my life no one can ever replace her

You musta lost your mind

 

[Don]

There are no limits. Think big, set plans, execute. With your Allah swt on your side anything’s possible

Apply this to acquiring lacag, business moves, with your wife. Etc InshaAllah you redeem yourself and get married to a Somali virgin aswell



For now Laakin

Disgusting. I liked your comment before you edited it. Id never do that to my wife and most importantly to my kids.

 

[Nin-culus]

Disgusting. I liked your comment before you edited it. Id never do that to my wife and most importantly to my kids.

Did you say something, Laangaab. clarify

 

[Don]

Did you say something, Laangaab. clarify

Marrying another.

 

[SOMALIKNIGHT]

The divorce rate of our parents' generation is not more than 10%. Anyone who says it is a big issue is a liar.

That said most Somali men don't want to divorce their wives. How come we never talk about the women? They make up 50% of the marriage. Do they not share blame? Was it them who ruined it?

 

[Puntlandtheglorious]

The divorce rate of our parents' generation is not more than 10%. Anyone who says it is a big issue is a liar.

That said most Somali men don't want to divorce their wives. How come we never talk about the women? They make up 50% of the marriage. Do they not share blame? Was it them who ruined it?

The blame is always on the male even though most of the time when the father leaves it cause he wants a peace of mind from the mom abusing him

 

[Abdurahman_somali]

It is not only the mans fault. A divorce is caused by two partners, not only one.

In most cases this Somali single mothers are ungrateful, loud and ungovernable, why don't people address this issue ?

I agree that many Somalis males are not raised to be men, but many Somali females on the other hand don't know how to treat a man properly. Look at how asians treat their men and compare it to some of these Xalimos.

This narrow minded view to just address the mistakes of men is not helpful.

 

[NotMyL]

The divorce rate of our parents' generation is not more than 10%. Anyone who says it is a big issue is a liar.

That said most Somali men don't want to divorce their wives. How come we never talk about the women? They make up 50% of the marriage. Do they not share blame? Was it them who ruined it?

They might as well been divorced or widowed as they don’t contribute anything to their family. What’s the point of staying married when you aren’t raising your children?

 

[SOMALIKNIGHT]

They might as well been divorced or widowed as they don’t contribute anything to their family. What’s the point of staying married when you aren’t raising your children?

Divorce has an effect on children. The sons have a higher chance of becoming criminals and the daughters becomes everyone's moped. Parents must stay together but they must go to the sheikh or their clan to fix their marriage. There needs to be agreements in place. The mother and father should not cause problems. The community and their children must always know if there are marital problems. They will fix it. If they must divorce, do it when every child has gets married

 

[NotMyL]

It is not only the mans fault. A divorce is caused by two partners, not only one.

In most cases this Somali single mothers are ungrateful, loud and ungovernable, why don't people address this issue ?

I agree that many Somalis males are not raised to be men, but many Somali females on the other hand don't know how to treat a man properly. Look at how asians treat their men and compare it to some of these Xalimos.

This narrow minded view to just address the mistakes of men is not helpful.

To get treated like the Asian men you first have to stop being a bum and take care of your family. Asian women treat their men better because they earned it, earn it before you ask

 

[HalimaJ]

It is not only the mans fault. A divorce is caused by two partners, not only one.

In most cases this Somali single mothers are ungrateful, loud and ungovernable, why don't people address this issue ?

I agree that many Somalis males are not raised to be men, but many Somali females on the other hand don't know how to treat a man properly. Look at how asians treat their men and compare it to some of these Xalimos.

This narrow minded view to just address the mistakes of men is not helpful.

You cannot expect a person to be docile when they are not given their rights.

One of the biggest tragedies as a man is knowing that your wife can kick you out and her life will be no different because you contribute nothing and are essentially dead weight.

No woman will respect you if you do not fulfill your role, similarly no man will respect her if she does not do what she meant to do.

 

[HalimaJ]

A woman will think twice about even raising her voice to a man if he is paying for the household and looking and raising the kids alongside her. If such a man leaves then she will suffer and find it difficult coping.

 

[NotMyL]

Divorce has an effect on children. The sons have a higher chance of becoming criminals and the daughters becomes everyone's moped. Parents must stay together but they must go to the sheikh or their clan to fix their marriage. There needs to be agreements in place. The mother and father should not cause problems. The community and their children must always know if there are marital problems. They will fix it. If they must divorce, do it when every child has gets married

So your solution is stay to with a husband who doesn’t provide for his family? Your kind is what’s wrong with our community. No women should put up with a bum

 

[Jaydaan]

You cannot expect a person to be docile when they are not given their rights.

One of the biggest tragedies as a man is knowing that your wife can kick you out and her life will be no different because you contribute nothing and are essentially dead weight.

No woman will respect you if you do not fulfill your role, similarly no man will respect her if she does not do what she meant to do.

A woman kicking her husband out and ceerta will pay her rent is the reason why marriage is going downhill in the west. It was designed by gaalo long time ago for a woman never to depend on men and this came around the 70s when a lot of women who got educated in the 60s saw their mums struggle in unhappy marriages and vowed to correct that wrong. We came to Europe yesterday and its way older than us