Somali single motherhood becoming a growing problem today

Lostbox

「Immortal Sage」| Qabil-fluid
VIP
Was single motherhood a problem before in are community? I don't know if there has been a big increase of them recently or I'm getting exposed to it more.

Most of them a struggling, do they even get child support?
 

Lostbox

「Immortal Sage」| Qabil-fluid
VIP
I talked with my sister about it. She said it is an increasing problem. She also said that men need to stop being selfish and take responsibility.
 

Emily

🥰🥰🥰
VIP
What about single fatherhood? Those kids’ fathers are single and collecting Welfare somewhere
 
I talked with my sister about it. She said it is an increasing problem. She also said that men need to stop being selfish and take responsibility.
In our community in the diaspora something unique takes place that you don't see in other communities when it comes to divorce.

Our Xaalimo's divorce the Faraax's.

What I mean by this is that none of the Farax's wanted or even desired divorce, they were crawling, pleading and many even begging but the female insisted on divorce and got her family involved who force the husband into divorce.

Our single mothers are mostly single mothers by choice not circumstances, it's very easy to tell which is which through a simple litmus test.

Look at her condition and the condition of her children, if they are in disarray and she is suffering, then she is a single mother by choice, going through divine punishment in this world to absolve her of the heinous crimes she has committed.

If however her affairs are normal and the children are decent, then she is a single mother through circumstances beyond her control, in our community such females make up the minority.

We have several ayah's in the Quran were Allah tells us that the calamities that happen to us in this world are as a result of the bad actions that we take, you reap what you sow in this life.

This idea of Farax's being "selfish" and needing to take "responsibility" is laughable if you know the realities, they plead and beg the Xaalimo's to reconsider divorce :gucciwhat:
 

Lostbox

「Immortal Sage」| Qabil-fluid
VIP
In our community something unique takes place that you don't see in other communities when it comes to divorce.

Our Xaalimo's divorce the Faraax's.

What I mean by this is that none of the Farax's wanted or even desired divorce, they were crawling, pleading and many even begging but the female insisted on divorce and got her family involved who force the husband into divorce.

Our single mothers are mostly single mothers by choice not circumstances, it's very easy to tell which is which through a simple litmus test.

Look at her condition and the condition of her children, if they are in disarray and she is suffering, then she is a single mother by choice, going through divine punishment in this world to absolve her of the heinous crimes she has committed.

If however her affairs are normal and the children are decent, then she is a single mother through circumstances beyond her control, in our community such females make up the minority.

We have several ayah's in the Quran were Allah tells us that the calamities that happen to us in this world are as a result of the bad actions that we take, you reap what you sow in this life.

This idea of Farax's being "selfish" and needing to take "responsibility" is laughable if you know the realities, they plead and beg the Xaalimo's to reconsider divorce :gucciwhat:
Thank you. I had no Idea. Well, the whole thing is a mess then.
 
Typically in MN I noticed most are not really divorced they just put down divorced on legal paper so they can collect single mother benefits while still being married Islamicaly.
 
Typically in MN I noticed most are not really divorced they just put down divorced on legal paper so they can collect single mother benefits while still being married Islamicaly.
 
In our community in the diaspora something unique takes place that you don't see in other communities when it comes to divorce.

Our Xaalimo's divorce the Faraax's.

What I mean by this is that none of the Farax's wanted or even desired divorce, they were crawling, pleading and many even begging but the female insisted on divorce and got her family involved who force the husband into divorce.

Our single mothers are mostly single mothers by choice not circumstances, it's very easy to tell which is which through a simple litmus test.

Look at her condition and the condition of her children, if they are in disarray and she is suffering, then she is a single mother by choice, going through divine punishment in this world to absolve her of the heinous crimes she has committed.

If however her affairs are normal and the children are decent, then she is a single mother through circumstances beyond her control, in our community such females make up the minority.

We have several ayah's in the Quran were Allah tells us that the calamities that happen to us in this world are as a result of the bad actions that we take, you reap what you sow in this life.

This idea of Farax's being "selfish" and needing to take "responsibility" is laughable if you know the realities, they plead and beg the Xaalimo's to reconsider divorce :gucciwhat:

You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
 

Lostbox

「Immortal Sage」| Qabil-fluid
VIP
Typically in MN I noticed most are not really divorced they just put down divorced on legal paper so they can collect single mother benefits while still being married Islamicaly.

I've also noticed this but that's a different demographic then the one I'm talking about. It's sad to see people are not able to sustain their lives with out government help. It's a another growing problem that should be talked about in the future.
 
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Those are the older generation Farax's whose tolerance for such abject humiliation is much lower then the males in our generation who I have seen countless times crawl, plead and beg to no avail in similar circumstances.

Kicking the father out of a house in the middle of the night is the kind of story you only hear from the Somali community, NEVER from other Muslim communities.

It's so common and nowadays done over such petty reasons, it no longer elicits shock, there are married guys who have been kicked out more then 10x's over the course of his marriage.
 
Last edited:

Sophisticate

~Gallantly Gadabuursi~
Staff Member
:farmajoyaab: I think marriage needs to be treated like a death cult - where you are in it for life. Unless at least one party is physically, emotionally or financially abusive/toxic (includes infidelity or unagreed upon polygamy) or the individual has serious issues with addiction/ substance abuse which compromises the health and sanity of the spouse. Otherwise people should wait, take their time, do some inner work and then consider marriage.
 
Last edited:

Basra

LOVE is a product of Doqoniimo mixed with lust
Let Them Eat Cake
VIP
in Africa the somali mother always hustles. the father was there but useless. but it was more of a collaboration. If he gets money he supports if not, he just lounges around while she hustles and be a mother at the same time.

The western phenomenon, only is the same but magnified in individual characteristic. That means - the somali mother hustles with great resources, ie welfares & minivans- and the farah husband character is magnified in his selfish, not ambitious pursuits of western leisure of uselessness


Basically its the same but in a different environment magnified- away from the dusty lands of sh!tholes
 

Umm-al-Dhegdheeriyaa

Run and I’ll catch you and eat you alive
In our community in the diaspora something unique takes place that you don't see in other communities when it comes to divorce.

Our Xaalimo's divorce the Faraax's.

What I mean by this is that none of the Farax's wanted or even desired divorce, they were crawling, pleading and many even begging but the female insisted on divorce and got her family involved who force the husband into divorce.

Our single mothers are mostly single mothers by choice not circumstances, it's very easy to tell which is which through a simple litmus test.

Look at her condition and the condition of her children, if they are in disarray and she is suffering, then she is a single mother by choice, going through divine punishment in this world to absolve her of the heinous crimes she has committed.

If however her affairs are normal and the children are decent, then she is a single mother through circumstances beyond her control, in our community such females make up the minority.

We have several ayah's in the Quran were Allah tells us that the calamities that happen to us in this world are as a result of the bad actions that we take, you reap what you sow in this life.

This idea of Farax's being "selfish" and needing to take "responsibility" is laughable if you know the realities, they plead and beg the Xaalimo's to reconsider divorce :gucciwhat:
Both men and women need to take responsibility over their divorce and if they have children all the more so!
I’ve seen both men and women divorce first, we aren’t in their private life so who our we to say who’s at fault? This mentality of blaming the woman first is not Islamic whatsoever, so stop.
 
:farmajoyaab: I think marriage needs to be treated like a death cult - where you are in it for life. Unless at least one party is physically, emotionally or financially abusive/toxic (includes infidelity or unagreed upon polygamy) or the individual has serious issues with addiction/ substance abuse which compromises the health and sanity of the spouse. Otherwise people should wait, take their time, do some inner work and then consider marriage.
Lol “death cult” bruhh. You make good point. It’s one of the most serious things out there.
 

Umm-al-Dhegdheeriyaa

Run and I’ll catch you and eat you alive
feminists corrupted our xalimos. but xalimos still want mehr. why? if we are equal, why do i "buy" you?
Feminism is utter bullshit.
Mehr is not ‘buying’ women. It’s disturbing that you think you can buy a woman. There are rights Allah gave men and rights Allah gave women.
Equal but not the same.
 
Top