She's getting alot of backlash for saying its rape to force your wife to have sex

[Aurelian]

Men without knowledge most of the time, especially when it come to female anatomy.

The thing is that, these type of men are who got the stage. We need to get those who know better, and are more like on our spectrum of this matter, that starts the answer with the verses of kindness and delegate that should happen between married couple.

 

[Hassan Garguute Buldanana]

How does one even enjoy forcing themselves or even get aroused on unwillingly partner? crazy world.

 

[KillStreakIsCool]

seriously whats the point of getting married when you can't even f*ck your own wife marriage has seriously been corrupted in the west

i said what i said

There are times she can't be available for personal reasons though. There is the expectation on both sides that intimacy is an obligation and the whole point of getting married, among other things, is to satisfy desires in non-sinful means. But with that said, and if you ask married couples, it is not always the case that a husband gets to have sex with his wife just because he wants to. 99% of the time, sex is mutual and both planned and unplanned.

This marital rape is alien concept to Somalis and I do understand why it is not even something they have heard before. Some are treating this lack of awareness as Somalis practicing marital rape and Somalis being in denial. Totally untrue.

 

[Aurelian]

seriously whats the point of getting married when you can't even f*ck your own wife marriage has seriously been corrupted in the west

i said what i said

That is the problem of marrying a human, for now, you can marry any sex doll, until science create a sex robot

 

[bisusa]

she is crazy to say force sex is rape no it is domestic violence . she just a feminist in a sheep clothing by saying that in islam it classifies forced sex as rape

 

[bisusa]

this one is crazy check the comment section how many people agree with him

This sheekh is using vulgar language aswell

i agree with . he is very knowgeable mashallah

 

[Deleted L]

she is crazy to say force sex is rape no it is domestic violence . she just a feminist in a sheep clothing by saying that in islam it classifies forced sex as rape

The same sheikh said on Twitter that forcing your wife to have intercourse is domestic abuse but not rape:

 

[World]

Whether it’s considered rape or domestic abuse, it doesn’t change the fact that it’s NOT allowed to physically force your wife against her will. The semantics doesn’t matter.

 

[madaxweyne]

There are times she can't be available for personal reasons though. There is the expectation on both sides that intimacy is an obligation and the whole point of getting married, among other things, is to satisfy desires in non-sinful means. But with that said, and if you ask married couples, it is not always the case that a husband gets to have sex with his wife just because he wants to. 99% of the time, sex is mutual and both planned and unplanned.

This marital rape is alien concept to Somalis and I do understand why it is not even something they have heard before. Some are treating this lack of awareness as Somalis practicing marital rape and Somalis being in denial. Totally untrue.

I agree that the whole point of marriage is to have sex but if the wife is refusing to do what she agreed to and starts weponizing sex and says you cant do anything without her approval then shes not fullfiling her duties and you should grt a divorce

Also sex isnt planned its not a holiday event its clearly human and biological you cant plan it like a feild trip it jus doest work like that

Thats why i feel if you dont wanna have sex dont get married this as an advice to women you cant allways get what you want in life

 

[bisusa]

The same sheikh said on Twitter that forcing your wife to have intercourse is domestic abuse but not rape:

yess as i said it should be clasify as domostic voilence not rape

 

[AdoonkaAlle]

So, in essence, Islam forestalls the whole marital rape saga by requiring adults to consent through the marriage contract? And therefore, any woman who might have refused sexual relationships without justification shouldn't get married to begin with?

The marriage contract is a legal consent to abide by all the obligations of marriage. So you're bound by the contract to do what you agreed on. In short you waiver any objections that would've prevented you from abstaining from said obligations. Having said that there are limits, guidelines, exemptions that come into play and this should be considered carefully.

The biggest problem that i see is that people assume that their moral consent is absolute and absolves them from what they consented to legally.

And therefore, any woman who might have refused sexual relationships without justification shouldn't get married to begin with?

Not necessarily as people have their shortcomings and we should be considerate. Even if her reasons are not valid it doesn't mean that she shouldn't have married to begin with. Rather it boils down to how frequent she refuses and the problem that may arise from it. Sometimes it may not cause a big issue and vice versa. It depends on the couple in question more so on the discretion of the husband as it's him who's being denied his right.

People need to aware of what they're getting themselves into when it comes to marriage and it's obligations.

I see why there is confusion in many Somalis seeing marital rape as alien because it is not something expected by culture.

The reason why it's alien to not only somalis but muslims in general is that rape as defined in islam can never take place within a lawful marriage. Rape falls under a category of zina ie forced unlawful sexual relation. Since a married man has the right to have sexual relations with his wife he can't be prosecuted under this law, which is why a different law is needed.

Sexual violence does occur in marriage and there are laws that islam has provided to deal with them correctly. Just because such injustices don't come under rape laws etc doesn't mean that they're not dealt with or that there no laws to combat them.

Dumarka have the right to be protected, cared for and given their rights just like men. So when dumarka are subjected to sexual violence and assault they've the right to seek justice and be given their rights that Allah gave them. We shouldn't belittle, dismiss or make a mockery of their injustices that they receive at the hands of men.

Unfortunately we like to engage in petty gender battles that are of no benefit and only lead to more problems. When has constant bickering and fighting ever solved any issue ? We need each other yet continue to behave in ways that only worsen what was already a fragile relationship. Isn't it about time to step back and reflect on how we can support each other so as to better ourselves and our society

And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquillity in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought." [30:21]


"It is He who created you from one soul and created from it its mate that he might dwell in security with her. And when he covers her, she carries a light burden and continues therein. And when it becomes heavy, they both invoke Allah , their Lord, "If You should give us a good [child], we will surely be among the grateful.'" [7:189]​

 

[Aurelian]

I don't get the idea of refusing to call it rape, although the definition applies to it.

Rape is a type of sexual assault usually involving sexual intercourse or other forms of sexual penetration carried out against a person without that person's consent.

Even in the Arabic section of this dilemma, they play on words to avoid calling it rape, even though the word in for rape is derived from "Forcing".

 

[bisusa]

They are calling it 'domestic abuse' when the man abused the wife's vagina with his penis, instead of calling it 'rape'. Yaab!

Sorry to people for putting it so crudely, because this is exactly what rape is, abuse with a penis.

so he should be put to death is that what your suggesting . because in islam rape is punishbale by death . this should be classified as domostic voilence not us rape . pls don't start using feministic narratives to elaborate your point

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

so he should be put to death is that what your suggesting . because in islam rape is punishbale by death . this should be classified as domostic voilence not us rape . pls don't start using feministic narratives to elaborate your point

Work on your reading comprehension skills.

 

[lst4RA]

she is crazy to say force sex is rape no it is domestic violence . she just a feminist in a sheep clothing by saying that in islam it classifies forced sex as rape

wallahi he was my favourite sheikh, why did he say this mann

 

[KillStreakIsCool]

I agree that the world point of marriage is to have sex but if the wife is refusing to do what she agreed to and starts weponizing sex and says you cant do anything without her approval then shes not fullfiling her duties and you should grt a divorce

Also sex isnt planned its not a holiday event its clearly human and biological you cant plan it like a feild trip it jus doest work like that

Thats why i feel if you dont wanna have sex dont get married this as an advice to women you cant allways get what you want in life

Afsoomaali ma taqaan saxib? Ma ogtahay in ninka naagta qabaahi uu xodxodto xaaskiisa markuu rabo inuu la seexdo? Isaga soo bood meesha ma ahan ma ogtahay ina adeer? Naagtaada shukaansi way u baahan tahay iyo inaad si dabeecad wanaagsan ugu sheegtid wasmo inaa doonaysid.

Just because sex is an expected deal doesn't mean in la isaga dul boodo naagta. Islaamka naaskeeda inaad taabato iyo raaxada kale ka hor galmada ayuuba dadka baraa. Sex is an Art saxib, isaga bood ma soconayso.

 

[AdoonkaAlle]

I don't get the idea of refusing to call it rape, although the definition applies to it.


Even in the Arabic section of this dilemma, they play on words to avoid calling it rape, even though the word in for rape is derived from "Forcing".

The reason why you're confused is that's not how rape is defined according to islam. You're just looking at the linguistic meaning without the shariah definition of the word.

Uk law defines rape as when a person intentionally penetrates another's vagina, anus or mouth with a penis, without the other person's consent.

In addition to consent they included the action of penetration with a penis, meaning a woman who forcefully has sex with a man can't be charged with rape. Excluded from this definition also is rape of women by other women. Only man can do the act of raping someone as per the uk definition that's why they've additional set of laws that deal with any forced sexual relation that isn't covered by the initial rape law. They make distinctions based on the nature of the sexual violation in question.

Compare this to usa definition of rape

“The penetration, no matter how slight, of the vagina or anus with any body part or object, or oral penetration by a sex organ of another person, without the consent of the victim.”

The us definition of rape is more comprehensive than the uk one as it includes any gender of victim and perpetrator, not just women being raped by men.

You just assume that what constitutes as rape and other sexual offenses are the same, hence the confusion.

 

[Aurelian]

The reason why you're confused is that's not how rape is defined according to islam. You're just looking at the linguistic meaning without the shariah definition of the word.

Uk law defines rape as when a person intentionally penetrates another's vagina, anus or mouth with a penis, without the other person's consent.

In addition to consent they included the action of penetration with a penis, meaning a woman who forcefully has sex with a man can't be charged with rape. Excluded from this definition is rape of women by other women. Only man can do the act of raping someone as per the uk definition that's why they've additional set of laws that deal with any forced sexual relation that isn't covered by the initial rape law. They make distinctions based on the nature of the sexual violation in question.

You just assume that what constitutes as rape and other sexual offenses are the same, hence the confusion.

Then there's something wrong with the definition if it contradicts the meaning of the word

 

[AdoonkaAlle]

Then there's something wrong with the definition if it contradicts the meaning of the word

Who get's to define it & on what basis ? you just assume that your understanding of what rape entails is universal. More importantly marital rape is recent phenomena even the west meaning a paradigm shift has occurred hence the new term.

 

[adventurequestworlds1.0.2]

there is no valid reason the hadith even said if she was on stove with food on she should leave it and attend to her husband

Only reason is if she is very ill