Secret wives= Shiah practise?!

[Finesse]

As soon as you tell your first wife you want to marry a second they get extremely jealous and insecure and demand divorce

"Am I not good enough"
"You dont love me anymore;"
"Wixi cusub aya la jecel"

Etc etc. So i dont blame these men who want to keep their family intact

Why tell her after you marry her? Why not tell her before the nikah "listen up abaayo, I may consider a second wife" and let her decide.

A lot of you lie to a woman about only wanting one wife and then when she's got stretch marks from carrying your big headed babies; you want a second wife.

Be a man, be upfront.

 

[Abdisamad]

Tell a woman in the beginning, before marriage, that you may explore polygamy so there are no issues later on.

Don't surprise her a few years into the marriage

what if you really love her and scare her away

 

[TekNiKo]

Why tell her after you marry her? Why not tell her before the nikah "listen up abaayo, I may consider a second wife" and let her decide.

A lot of you lie to a woman about only wanting one wife and then when she's got stretch marks from carrying your big headed babies; you want a second wife.

Be a man, be upfront.

What if a man falls in love with another woman? No one plans love my dear. It is spontaneous and random, also a Muslim women should automatically know there is always potential for a second wife since its permissible in Islam. Unless the man stipulates that he will only marry one wife in the nikah contract then she can demand that

 

[Finesse]

What if a man falls in love with another woman? No one plans love my dear. It is spontaneous and random, also a Muslim women should automatically know there is always potential for a second wife since its permissible in Islam. Unless the man stipulates that he will only marry one wife in the nikah contract then she can demand that

Then don't hide it? Also, if you fall in love with a second wife, give your first wife a chance to either accept it or fall in love with another man. Hiding an entire wife is cowardly and selfish.

 

[Finesse]

what if you really love her and scare her away

You can love another woman just as easily, I also believe that Allah blesses honest and genuine men.

I know a man who has 2 wives, one is older and his first and the second is much younger, both wives are happy. But then again, he is nin rag ah with money and a sincere attitude.

 

[Happy_]

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[Abdisamad]

You can love another woman just as easily, I also believe that Allah blesses honest and genuine men.

I know a man who has 2 wives, one is older and his first and the second is much younger, both wives are happy. But then again, he is nin rag ah with money and a sincere attitude.

What about if you don't know you want a second wife but after 10 years of marriage you find out you want to increase with one extra

 

[Prettymuslim94]

I knew some Lebanese shias who say that you can do zina if you say bismillah before

No way

 

[TekNiKo]

Then don't hide it? Also, if you fall in love with a second wife, give your first wife a chance to either accept it or fall in love with another man. Hiding an entire wife is cowardly and selfish.

Your right he should tell her and if she doesnt accept he should divorce her ass.

 

[Prettymuslim94]

Just tell your wife you want 4 wives from the beginning .So if you ever find another woman you want to wife up she can't complain

 

[Leila]

I keep hearing stories about Middle-aged and elderly Somali men being caught with multiple wives. Since when is this permitted in Islam?
In Islam a marriage (new wife) should be announced, not hidden like a mistress.

Imagine the children from such a marriage, having to live as though they are illegitimate and only the first wife's children are acknowledged /public knowledge.

I am 100% convinced that Somali men have adopted a shia practise and are trying to make it "halal".

Why have Somali men become so cowardly about polygamy? What happened to the brave men of yesteryear who married multiple wives and even told their first wife what their plans are.

The most harrowing and contemptuous issue is that often these Somali men marry without carrying out STD tests and have brought HIV home to their unsuspecting wives and passed it onto their offspring.

A lot of men think women are just being "jealous", no, women don't respect cowardice and treachery.

Men should be honest about their desires for polygamy , I have respect for a man who tells a potential that he wishes for more than one wife . There are some women that actually don't mind their husbands to marry again but don’t be a coward who marries a woman , gets tired of her and instead of being a man and talk about the issue he looks for another woman behind her back .

Sometimes the new woman even blackmails or extorts the husband because he is scared that the first wife will be told !

 

[Finesse]

What about if you don't know you want a second wife but after 10 years of marriage you find out you want to increase with one extra

Tell her, maybe she also wants another husband.

 

[Hodan from HR]

There's a famous Somali saying , Naag been kuxer ruun-na kudaq

These men who are into polygamy believe this so they ambush their wife by waiting till she has 2 to 3 kids before they marry the second one, knowing she's likely to stay for the kids. This trick has been backfiring on them the past few decades with women not needing financial support from the husband.

Polygamy is the leading cause of divorce among diaspora Somalis imo.

 

[THE SOMALI POLYGLOT]

No way

There's a reason why Lebanon is the most progressive Muslim country. The explosion was a divine punishment just as what happened to Lut

 

[Vanessa]

During the kacaan era, sisters/secret wives were common, I used hear stories about it from family members and habaryaal.

I’m not sure, if it’s still practising now

 

[Mercury]

Its easy if you want marry many wives than look for girls who dont mind

Its only cowards who would hide marrying 2nd wife

 

[Yukon_Niner]

As soon as you tell your first wife you want to marry a second they get extremely jealous and insecure and demand divorce

"Am I not good enough"
"You dont love me anymore;"
"Wixi cusub aya la jecel"

Etc etc. So i dont blame these men who want to keep their family intact

 

[Mercury]

There's a famous Somali saying , Naag been kuxer ruun-na kudaq

These men who are into polygamy believe this so they ambush their wife by waiting till she has 2 to 3 kids before they marry the second one, knowing she's likely to stay for the kids. This trick has been backfiring on them the past few decades with women not needing financial support from the husband.

Polygamy is the leading cause of divorce among diaspora Somalis imo.

Here in Sweden theres guys that will look to marry a girl whose a single mother and whose living on benefits and got housing so he doesnt need to provide or spend much on her

 

[Octavian]

Here in Sweden theres guys that will look to marry a girl whose a single mother and whose living on benefits and got housing so he doesnt need to provide or spend much on her

does the sewedish gov pay out allot in benefits