Opinions on secret marriages?
- Thread starter YoungFarah
- Start date
- Status
Been going on since the beginning of Islam saxib
Sarah136
Hot and cold
The nikaax is void without the permission of her walee regardless of her situation and this is the view of majority of the scholars.
Daleel:
the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him):
“There should be no nikaah (marriage contract) except with a wali (guardian).”
(Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 1101; Abu Dawood, 2085; Ibn Maajah, 1881
Exactly. Practically speaking, this type of practice benefits men much more so than it does women(even if the woman shares the same desires). If the average woman actually does agree to go along with this...imo, she lacks foresight. Where is the security in such a union??
ImpossiblePerhaps there are women who would want that type of relationship?
Sarah136
Hot and cold
This true story I came across on somalifaces page is a great example
"It happened two years ago. I was 16 years old when I fell in love for the first time with someone who lived in the same city as I, and it was my most painful experience. He suggested that we enter into a secret marriage (qudbo sirro) as opposed to a traditional marriage so that we can become a family. I was a student that lived with her family. Because I was in love with him, I was willing to do anything just to be with him. The next day, he brought two witnesses, and we were legally though secretly married. We became a secret family and lived happily as one until I fell ill. I went to the doctor, and he told me that I was several weeks pregnant. Overjoyed, I immediately rang my husband and told him the news. He became angry and told me never to contact him again, that the child was not his and that if I ever told anyone about it, I'd be in trouble. Only God knows how I felt that day. My world came crashing down. For a year and a half, I lived in a hellish situation; of insecurity, intolerable anxiety, no money and other things that I can't mention to you. Sometimes, out of desperation, I'd call him, sobbing like mad, begging him just to tell his family that the child is his, divorce me and that I will raise the child on my own. It felt like my words fell on deaf on ears. He never listened. I contacted his sisters, and they gave me the same treatment, telling me that their brother was already engaged and that they can't destroy his future. My brothers eventually found out that I was pregnant. Out of anger, they threatened to kill me, so I fled. I escaped from home, from my stable existence and sought shelter at a city council. I was temporarily placed in a camp that helps discriminated women. They granted me permission to stay there until I give birth. After a while, my contractions started and I passed out. I awoke a day later in a hospital. The doctors and nurses told me that I gave birth to the most beautiful girl that they have ever seen. I was over the moon, but it was short-lived. An hour later, the same doctors told me that my daughter had breathing complications and died. I falsely assumed that my days of hardship and despair would be behind me until they told me that awful news. I'm still recovering now. Secret marriages have destroyed many lives."
(Nairobi, Kenya)
Gambar
VIP
That's a truly sad story
embarassing
VIP
Either get married or take the L for your sins. Don't try to change the religion to suit you. This seems tragic it reminded me of this story I read on SomaliFaces
My female cousin did a secret marriage last year, the guy promised he would talk with her parents after the wedding that way they couldn't say no. So they go to the imam and get married. Then he convinces her to swing by a hotel because they're already married so what could be the harm kinda thing, 1month down the road she finds out she's pregnant and he still hasn't spoken to her parents. He says he's nervous and doesn't have enough money yer, a lot of excuses. Basically at this point she knows she's fucked and goes to Seattle to vist her older sister in order to hide her growing belly. Her sister notices something is up and eventually she tells her sister what happened. Her sister calls my dad and my dad tells her family. Her family and my family go to the guy's family pressure him to marry her within the month- he agrees and they get married. There's a whole lot more to this story and about the guy but I don't feel like typing, one interesting thing thou- she would later find out he already has 4 other kids and 2 other wives. Mortal of the story DON'T GET MARRIED SECRETLY TO A PERSON YOU'VE KNOWN FOR A SHORT TIME.
No you're not you are trying to damn hard
First you had Fred written every comment of your like a signature and now it's ashy Abdi
And what happened to the whole henny and qaxwa business
I'm not fake fasting either nacasyahow
I'm just joking with the signatures and you take it seriously gaalo daanyeer I mean dhegdheer
I already said I've stopped with Henny iyo Qaxwo, I've quit months and months ago, but you don't pay attention because your to busy tuuring it back for your gaalo professors who think that they are "woke".
http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthread.php?264453-The-evidence-for-marriage-without-waliWhat?
That's what they believe
black
live and let die.
It's a lot more pragmatic, especially if you want to keep things low key. When it's time you can give her a 2-year-late xaflad and go through the whole charade.
I see it as a win-win and can definitely see the appeal of it
TekNiKo
Loyal To The One True Caliph (Hafidahullah)
Its fairly normal, especially if the couples parents would refuse the marriage otherwise.
Many young birds go to the next city and get married there. The marriage probably won't stay secret for long when she gets pregnant, that's when the man has to claim her. Making it public
Many young birds go to the next city and get married there. The marriage probably won't stay secret for long when she gets pregnant, that's when the man has to claim her. Making it public
Gambar
VIP
So you're linking to an islamic forum? Do you understand what the purpose of a wali is? It's for the protection of the girl, therefore, no funny business. The deen is perfect as it is, you can't shape and mold it how you like.
I am not as I have said countless times I don't agree but these are the justifications some people use I don't know what is wrong with you're ability to understand I DONT AGREE WITH THIS KIND OF STUFF. It is however something that occurs in the Somali community.
Gambar
VIP
I doubt the validity of these marriages.
- Status
