My lil bro is heartbroken

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Mckenzie

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Had a chat today with my younger brother whose been frustrated with his failing love life.

He's not even 25 yet but said his girl broke up with him recently because she didn't want to wait for him to "get his shit together".

I asked him to describe this girl and explain these demands she wants, turns out she's a little younger, with a year left at University. She has no money of her own but expects the kid to already have a down payment on a flat, not drive a rental like most his age but instead own a car in this expensive ass city, have the money to throw a massive wedding and enough money for a years rent and to have a credible profession. She has all these expectations (some are reasonable some aren't) because in her head she wants to skip the headache of joining the real world when she graduates and become a stay-at-home wife. :ohhh:

From her part she agreed to play housewife given she can be provided for.

I told him she drives a hard bargain but you can't blame her for wanting a secure future. But atleast she's willing to be a housewife, that's unheard of these days, war inanta ma salafi baa :drakelaugh:

Anyway he said all his friends are going through similar problems and the girls they all want are dating and marrying older guys, only to end up being divorced.

Which brings me to my question, what happened to growing together through struggle? Why do some girls drop the young Abdi just to get with the older Abdi who they have no chemistry with? Yeah he has money but you barely know him?

I feel like this leads to a vicious cycle. Xalimo breaks up with Young Abdi because she doesn't believe in his potential. Young Abdi loses motivation and messes around. Xalimo marries older Abdi who doesn't treat her right because he was expecting a doormat after years of also messing around because a previous Xalimo probably broke his heart too.

Now everyone is unhappy, all because of instant gratification? I think this generation need a reality check wallahi. We don't have parents with generational wealth, learn to be humble and appreciate a simpler life. Half of you are in debt and probably won't afford houses for decades. Instead of a big wedding, have a modest one. Instead of the Shard, go to Tinseltown, instead of driving 18 plates, how about an uber if you're travelling or even a nice walk? Or is romance just about snapping dashboards?
 

Spiderman

Shalom goyim
Down payment on a house and a car? I'd tell her futaday leef nayaa f*ck that hoe shit bruv, :drakekidding:man said down payment on a house. Oi tell him to tell her to go f*ck herself and find her betabux elsewhere:mjlaugh:
 

Mckenzie

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Down payment on a house and a car? I'd tell her futaday leef nayaa f*ck that hoe shit bruv, :drakekidding:man said down payment on a house. Oi tell him to tell her to go f*ck herself and find her betabux elsewhere:mjlaugh:

Sxb can't lie his girl is a quruxleey :mjlaugh: if she's happy to stay at home too i have to say i'm impressed he found a girl like that

i'm tempted to say igu soo wareeji but i'm not that heartless:mjlol:
 

Cumar

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Bro Somali women don't believe in waiting and our culture doesn't either. I noticed we are very different from the other Muslim ethnicities.

Go to any Uni or college in the west and you'll see Arabs, Asians they all date young when they're broke students and when they secure good jobs then they get married. Basically they support each other through the struggle as you mentioned. This is unheard of in Somali community.

Somali guys are expected to tough it out till their late 20's or early 30s when they hopefully got decent career going. Then they usually go for younger girls usually around 19-22. Problem is this doesn't work in the west where fitna is everywhere and dudes start messing around.
 
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Mckenzie

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Bro Somali women don't believe in waiting and our culture doesn't either. I noticed we are very different from the other Muslim ethnicities.

Go to any Uni or college in the west and you'll see Arabs, Asians they all date young when they're broke students and when they secure good jobs then they get married. Basically they support each other through the struggle as you mentioned. This is unheard of in Somali community.

Somali guys are expected to tough it out till their late 20's or early 30s when they hopefully got decent career going. Then they usually go for younger girls usually around 19-22. Problem is this doesn't work in the west when fitna is everywhere and dudes start messing around.

What's a 20 year old girl gonna do with a 30 year old guy? He's probably tired of living life and she'll want to be taken on boat cruises and safaris to show off to her friends.

Does your brother have a plan? What does he do to cause her to give up on him?

As i suspect, she has other niggas (probably older niggas) on her line that can offer her what he can't. It's not even about who you like, wuxu waaba forex trading oo kale, trading love for the best rate :damn:
 
What's a 20 year old girl gonna do with a 30 year old guy? He's probably tired of living life and she'll want to be taken on boat cruises and safaris to show off to her friends.



As i suspect, she has other niggas (probably older niggas) on her line that can offer her what he can't. It's not even about who you like, wuxu waaba forex trading oo kale, trading love for the best rate :damn:
Yeah if she really liked him and wanted to marry him she would stick around through it all. I know a lot of girls who do, it's kindve sad. Can't blame her either there are a lot of Somali guys who only care about partying many of them never seem to grow out of it and get their life in order. It's best to avoid getting stuck in one of those tragic situations.
 

Mckenzie

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Yeah if she really liked him and wanted to marry him she would stick around through it all. I know a lot of girls who do, it's kindve sad. Can't blame her either there are a lot of Somali guys who only care about partying many of them never seem to grow out of it and get their life in order. It's best to avoid getting stuck in one of those tragic situations.

He graduated years ago but like most ppl, he changed jobs, been on holidays and spent shit tonnes of money over the years. No one saves serious money in their early 20s anyway. He's only known her for like 8 months. But he wanted to do everything right by her, she even made him quit smoking weed :jaynerd:

I told him don't sweat it, if she made you feel that way you should be glad, cos for years i thought the nigga had a heart of stone.

The only way i got him to calm down was to say love ain't real. It's all one big lie, forget feelings, all that weed you smoked got you soft af. We just procreate for kids and everything else is make-believe.
 

Emily

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She is right, your brother needs to get his shit together. He shouldn’t be dating under 25 anyway, he should be grinding hard and getting his shit together. Also why is her ass rushing you supposed get into your career after uni but this b wants to become a housewife:heh:
The girl just wants free stuff :holeup:
Your brother is better off without her.
 
He graduated years ago but like most ppl, he changed jobs, been on holidays and spent shit tonnes of money over the years. No one saves serious money in their early 20s anyway. He's only known her for like 8 months. But he wanted to do everything right by her, she even made him quit smoking weed :jaynerd:

I told him don't sweat it, if she made you feel that way you should be glad, cos for years i thought the nigga had a heart of stone.

The only way i got him to calm down was to say love ain't real. It's all one big lie, forget feelings, all that weed you smoked got you soft af. We just procreate for kids and everything else is make-believe.
If she seriously expected him to have all that in his early twenties she's delusional. But usually the issue is there are no signs of change or a plan for the future, thats a problem especially if you consider children.

Thats sad but he'll be fine. At least he dropped a bad habit. But don't corrupt him with that love isn't real talk :tacky:
 
@Kudhufo Kadhaqaq
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Yo, this sounds all too familiar and I know a few friends going through similar stuff. I'm going to guess his girl is younger and still in uni?

I've come to realise there's a complete disconnect between genders some time in our early-mid 20's. Honestly, I think there's an awkward age or phase girls go through during uni where they're mature enough to identify what's important in life, i.e. a career and goals, but they haven't really entered the real world yet. This is why they set their requirements strictly on ideals and what could be.

From my experience, 95% of girls aged 23/24+ that have started their career or are desperately looking carve a path to one are completely reasonable. They're not idiots, they know what you're going through. It's the parents and younger-ish girls that are unreasonable.

My friend has been playing halal bf/gf with a hijabi since fucking 2014. You know what the girl's father told him a few weeks ago? Buy a house if you're serious. LOL. Now he's contemplating a mortgage even though he knows it's haram. Last year he gave her his car and insured her on it. "His" girl started uni late, hasn't graduated yet and hasn't worked a day in her life. Still she's fully backing her dad on it. It's gotten to the point where he can't be roasted because it went from funny to sad.

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Mckenzie

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She is right, your brother needs to get his shit together. He shouldn’t be dating under 25 anyway, he should be grinding hard and getting his shit together. Also why is her ass rushing you supposed get into your career after uni but this b wants to become a housewife:heh:
The girl just wants free stuff :holeup:
Your brother is better off without her.

Nah, i will not let my lil bro overwork himself and grind to an early grave just to impress some f*cking bimbo. Otherwise he'd become that over-age Abdi that me and @Cumar spoke about, wifying up a young ting when he's exhausted and past his prime years. Missing out on creating real memories with someone he's grown with.

I've said it before and i'll say it again. It's high time young Abdis drop their standards, give that average miskiin Xalimo a chance. She will wait for you and she will never play with your money or time.
 
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Bernie Madoff

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Nah, i will not let my lil bro overwork himself and grind to an early grave just to impress some f*cking bimbo. Otherwise he'd become that over-age Abdi that me and @Cumar spoke about, wifying up a young ting when he's exhausted and past his prime years. Missing out on creating real memories with someone he's grown with.

I've said it before and i'll say it again. It's high time young Abdis drop their standards, give that average miskiin Xalimo a chance. She will wait for you and she will never play with your money or time.
Well said McKenzie :qri8gs7::qri8gs7:
 
If anything, he needs a woman around his age who is working as well. That will solve the delusional expectations. Either that or a very pragmatic student.

But honestly, she needs to figure herself out and your brother needs to do the same. They don't need to be in relationships right now imo :manny:
 
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