Marriage And Happiness

[Mad-MullaH]

My topic on not wanting marriage devolved into people telling me that I will become a cat lady and end up in a nursing home. This confirmed my suspicions that marriage is held with such high regard in society when in reality it is a shaky institution. Divorce rates are so high for Somalis. We can’t seem to have stable marriages and are quick to divorce. I have been told by eedos to get a degree and a good job in case my future husband leaves me a single mom. That is the kind of advice young Somali girls get by our society. How is that normal? But I’m crazy for not wanting a marriage and just getting a donor to have kids? So my question is, what is so great about marriage? Does it really make you happy? I would like to hear from married people or those wanting marriage.

If you allow your husband to be him self and listen to him.. and you take care of your
pu nani..and give it to him in morning as soon as he wakes up..and before he sleeps
You will reduce your chances of divorce by 30%

now if you are creative in the kitchen and cook good food you will reduces your chances of getting divorced by 90%

 

[Destiny]

2 already happy and well adjusted people with common values and = a good marriage

1 happy well-adjusted person with no interest in coupling is fine too.

People should live as they see fit. We don't have to all live the same cookie cutter lives.

Why don't you adopt if you never intend on marrying. It beats committing medically assisted zina.

I want to have my own baby.

 

[Sophisticate]

I want to have my own baby.

Why not just marry? At least you'll have a donor and a second stream of income. Must this be an either or situation?

 

[Destiny]

Why not just marry? At least you'll have a donor and a second stream of income. Must this be an either or situation?

I’ll think about it. I was a little hellbent on not doing it, but I appreciate everyone’s insight on this. I’ll wait a few years and see if I feel any different about marriage.

 

[Guardafui]

My momma always said the the most important thing you can get out of a marriage is children because these tiny little being are yours, your blood they can’t be taken away from you but a man can leave any day so marry to have kids that’s my advice they’ll look after you one day. If you find a man who’s your soul mate and have a great companionship then keep him you’re lucky.

 

[Kol3]

My topic on not wanting marriage devolved into people telling me that I will become a cat lady and end up in a nursing home. This confirmed my suspicions that marriage is held with such high regard in society when in reality it is a shaky institution. Divorce rates are so high for Somalis. We can’t seem to have stable marriages and are quick to divorce. I have been told by eedos to get a degree and a good job in case my future husband leaves me a single mom. That is the kind of advice young Somali girls get by our society. How is that normal? But I’m crazy for not wanting a marriage and just getting a donor to have kids? So my question is, what is so great about marriage? Does it really make you happy? I would like to hear from married people or those wanting marriage.

Sis I don’t think it will make you happy, but if you really want kids you’ll have it in a halal way... regardless if you get divorced or end up a single mother. Or you can adopt.
The only people that get happiness from this kind of companionship is the ones that are emotionally available, and by the looks of it you are not. Others want to experience intimacy in a halal way, regardless of thinking about anything else... what matters to them is if they see someone they like, they would want to be intimate with them and so they do it the right way by marrying them. We have islam just do things the right way... nobody said you have to fall in love, this...that.... love dries up fast too. Allah only said do things the halal way. That’s all.

 

[Sophisticate]

I’ll think about it. I was a little hellbent on not doing it, but I appreciate everyone’s insight on this. I’ll wait a few years and see if I feel any different about marriage.

Update us then. Generally humans were meant to pair bond. Even I'm reluctant to marry and have not seriously considered it yet its worth considering.

Generally those that are 30 + have better marital survival rates than their younger counterparts but the rate of divorce starts to increase as you start approaching 40.

 

[Gambar]

Live your life sweetie stop worrying about what heblaayo thinks

 

[Gambar]

Again are you gaal? Because marriage is half of the Deen.

It doesn’t mean marriage is compulsory. Are you gaal kulaha. The biggest xoolo always have the most to say.

 

[Xasusi]

Adoption is also haram, as is zina but you already knew that

Adoption isn't haram you retard

 

[Mehdi Hassan]

Adoption isn't haram you retard

Calm it with the name-calling legal adoption definitely is cuz it entails name change

 

[Marsh]

Adoption isn't haram you retard

It isnt haram but it is treated much differently than a normal child. They cant get money from your will and if she adopted a boy he would not be mahram to her if she did not breastfeed him which complicates things.

 

[Zahra]

My topic on not wanting marriage devolved into people telling me that I will become a cat lady and end up in a nursing home. This confirmed my suspicions that marriage is held with such high regard in society when in reality it is a shaky institution. Divorce rates are so high for Somalis. We can’t seem to have stable marriages and are quick to divorce. I have been told by eedos to get a degree and a good job in case my future husband leaves me a single mom. That is the kind of advice young Somali girls get by our society. How is that normal? But I’m crazy for not wanting a marriage and just getting a donor to have kids? So my question is, what is so great about marriage? Does it really make you happy? I would like to hear from married people or those wanting marriage.

I am married and marriage takes A LOT of work, patience, and communication. Marriage is a beautiful concept but it will test you in ways you never thought. There are days when I look at my husband and think to myself WHY WHY WHY and then there are days that I look at him and feel so in love.

 

[Basra]

My topic on not wanting marriage devolved into people telling me that I will become a cat lady and end up in a nursing home. This confirmed my suspicions that marriage is held with such high regard in society when in reality it is a shaky institution. Divorce rates are so high for Somalis. We can’t seem to have stable marriages and are quick to divorce. I have been told by eedos to get a degree and a good job in case my future husband leaves me a single mom. That is the kind of advice young Somali girls get by our society. How is that normal? But I’m crazy for not wanting a marriage and just getting a donor to have kids? So my question is, what is so great about marriage? Does it really make you happy? I would like to hear from married people or those wanting marriage.

Huuno...if u want true happiness, u have to seek it within yourself. What fulfills your soul. Not what fulfills your body. Marriage should be viewed as a business transaction. U want kids for retirement investments. Or u want to fight your lonely insecurities, which ends up failing.

The best way is to stand up and pray to your Allaah swt. Period.

This world is meant for trial and tribulations. Failed marriages is part of this trials.

If u want to know how u will end up, u have to see how u grew up. If u grew up in a single hooyo house hold, u will be a single mother household. etc etc