Marriage And Happiness

[Destiny]

My topic on not wanting marriage devolved into people telling me that I will become a cat lady and end up in a nursing home. This confirmed my suspicions that marriage is held with such high regard in society when in reality it is a shaky institution. Divorce rates are so high for Somalis. We can’t seem to have stable marriages and are quick to divorce. I have been told by eedos to get a degree and a good job in case my future husband leaves me a single mom. That is the kind of advice young Somali girls get by our society. How is that normal? But I’m crazy for not wanting a marriage and just getting a donor to have kids? So my question is, what is so great about marriage? Does it really make you happy? I would like to hear from married people or those wanting marriage.

 

[Mehdi Hassan]

My topic on not wanting marriage devolved into people telling me that I will become a cat lady and end up in a nursing home. This confirmed my suspicions that marriage is held with such high regard in society when in reality it is a shaky institution. Divorce rates are so high for Somalis. We can’t seem to have stable marriages and are quick to divorce. I have been told by eedos to get a degree and a good job in case my future husband leaves me a single mom. That is the kind of advice young Somali girls get by our society. How is that normal? But I’m crazy for not wanting a marriage and just getting a donor to have kids? So my question is, what is so great about marriage? Does it really make you happy? I would like to hear from married people.

Sperm donation is haram unless it's your husband's but fair points otherwise

 

[Mehdi Hassan]

Can't speak as to married life though obviously

 

[Shmurda]

You don't have to get married you can be single and have a good life. Its just stupid to use a sperm donor when you could just smash a nigga on the street or adopt a somali orphan.

 

[Mehdi Hassan]

Why not do both? It isn't completely unheard of

 

[Mehdi Hassan]

You don't have to get married you can be single and have a good life. Its just stupid to use a sperm donor when you could just smash a nigga on the street or adopt a somali orphan.

Adoption is also haram, as is zina but you already knew that

 

[CaliTedesse]

My topic on not wanting marriage devolved into people telling me that I will become a cat lady and end up in a nursing home. This confirmed my suspicions that marriage is held with such high regard in society when in reality it is a shaky institution. Divorce rates are so high for Somalis. We can’t seem to have stable marriages and are quick to divorce. I have been told by eedos to get a degree and a good job in case my future husband leaves me a single mom. That is the kind of advice young Somali girls get by our society. How is that normal? But I’m crazy for not wanting a marriage and just getting a donor to have kids? So my question is, what is so great about marriage? Does it really make you happy? I would like to hear from married people or those wanting marriage.

Again are you gaal? Because marriage is half of the Deen.

 

[Mehdi Hassan]

I feel like growing up single and childless would be worse as a man but still quite lonely and depressing for women as well

 

[Jaydaan]

People say get a degree so you can always have something to support yourself on. Married or not you should never depend on someone else taking care of you. Human beings are not built to be live alone all their lives. We crave companionship, friendship and has sexual needs. Most also has need to procreate. If marriage isnt whats best system to keep this together, then take out marriage of the picture. people will still do everything but instead of with married partner it will be random people.

 

[Ferrari]

You're not crazy and the eedoos are right. statistically speaking, you have about 70% of getting divorced by your faarax if you marry.

that's just facts.

Try arabs or whites, the arab might beat you up couple times a week, and the cadaan might one day wake up and kill you, but neither will divorce you quick like a faarax, or make you a second+ wife.

 

[Tawheed]

My topic on not wanting marriage devolved into people telling me that I will become a cat lady and end up in a nursing home. This confirmed my suspicions that marriage is held with such high regard in society when in reality it is a shaky institution. Divorce rates are so high for Somalis. We can’t seem to have stable marriages and are quick to divorce. I have been told by eedos to get a degree and a good job in case my future husband leaves me a single mom. That is the kind of advice young Somali girls get by our society. How is that normal? But I’m crazy for not wanting a marriage and just getting a donor to have kids? So my question is, what is so great about marriage? Does it really make you happy? I would like to hear from married people or those wanting marriage.

why don't u wanna marry are u ok?

 

[Mehdi Hassan]

why don't u wanna marry are u ok?

I hope you're just trolling

 

[Tawheed]

I hope you're just trolling

no I am serious why would a sane person not wanna marry

 

[Mehdi Hassan]

no I am serious why would a sane person not wanna marry

For all the reasons listed above...

 

[Tawheed]

For all the reasons listed above...

but I know why the divorce rate is so high and she didn't say why sxb

 

[Caaro]

My topic on not wanting marriage devolved into people telling me that I will become a cat lady and end up in a nursing home. This confirmed my suspicions that marriage is held with such high regard in society when in reality it is a shaky institution. Divorce rates are so high for Somalis. We can’t seem to have stable marriages and are quick to divorce. I have been told by eedos to get a degree and a good job in case my future husband leaves me a single mom. That is the kind of advice young Somali girls get by our society. How is that normal? But I’m crazy for not wanting a marriage and just getting a donor to have kids? So my question is, what is so great about marriage? Does it really make you happy? I would like to hear from married people or those wanting marriage.

You're acting as if Marrying will lead to a divorce 100%. I don't know where your statistics are coming from but I rarely ever see divorces in the somali community. What you're doing is making the assumptions that harden into beliefs forming your reality and fears. Instead of saying I won't get married, look for people that you can possibly marry, if they don't satisfy you that is when you can make the decision. Don't cut yourself off immediately just because you THINK marriage = divorce. Think about it, how many married couples do you know and how many divorced couples do you know? The reason why your eedos told you to get a degree and job is so that you can never rely on someone. They're not saying "Have a degree so you can get a job WHEN you divorce" it's "Have a degree so you can get a job IF you divorce". It's called preparing for the worst and hoping for the best. Divorces happen mainly because the couple don't know what they're getting into, so if you can trust yourself to do your part and find a proper man then you should have little fear of a divorce

 

[Mehdi Hassan]

but I know why the divorce rate is so high and she didn't say why sxb

Tell me plz

 

[Mehdi Hassan]

Enlighten us

 

[Caaro]

For all the reasons listed above...

the only reason she gave is that divorce rates are high. Which isn't a good enough reason.

 

[Mehdi Hassan]

the only reason she gave is that divorce rates are high. Which isn't a good enough reason.

If you told a women you plan on divorcing her I wouldn't expect that she marry you