Is it virtually impossible for a married man not to cheat in todays time?

[Nak-Muay-Kru]

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Yeah it’s crazy how the thought of their wife even looking at other men will make them go crazy or the thought of her kissing another guy vomit but yet expect her to sit quietly and share 3 other women with him, like she has no feelings or a heart! How? Does? That?Logic?Work?

Whats even worse imo is a lot of the guys writing this here aren’t even married yet meaning they’re already contemplating and premeditating. Which means when they do get married finally it’s going to be sham marriage as he already planned to be unfaithful long before marrying her...unbeknownst to her. Imagine!

I mean if they want multiple wives, it's their right Islamically speaking but it comes with certain stipulations.

I don't think they realized the logistics involved in dealing with multiple women. One marriage is buuq and headache enough, imagine multiplying that by 2 or 3. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy wallahi, it's one way-ticket to an early grave

 

[Amirah]

How did our Somali forefathers have the camels and patience and time for all that

look at their decendents now fighting over for leadership of Somalia

They didn’t...that’s why a lot of the children(from the different mothers)had cuqdad and rivery that lasted a lifetime. They were basically strangers to each other. Also the women would constantly hate and fight each other. What’s worse is the husband because he has only one heart and favoritism is inherent in humans; he’d pick one outta the 4 as a favorite blatantly which fueled further resentment. And he’d usually completely would ignore at least 1. All the day to day work were left to the women and children to attend to. The husband was treated like a king as he had 4 women competing for his attention. It’s was chaos, dysfunctional and xaq daaro. A lotta older women if you talk to them they’ll say Somalia was destroyed because of all the injustice against women, because they know firsthand!

 

[Eedaaf]

They didn’t...that’s why a lot of the children(from the different mothers)had cuqdad and rivery that lasted a lifetime. They were basically strangers to each other. Also the women would constantly hate and fight each other. What’s worse is the husband because he has only one heart and favoritism is inherent in humans; he’d pick one outta the 4 as a favorite blatantly which fueled further resentment. And he’d usually completely would ignore at least 1. All the day to day work were left to the women and children to attend to. The father was treated like a king as he had 4 women competing for his attention. It’s was chaos, dysfunctional and xaq daaro. A lotta older women if you talk to them they’ll say Somalia was destroyed because of all the injustice against women.

So the problem is one Somali guy didnt want to have kids with the same woman

guess if I want a lot of kids I should stick to one woman

so is that why dhulbahante hate mj because they have different mothers

qabilism is a headache

 

[Jaydaan]

The temptations in the west is at a all time high a married farah sees young supply of halimos everywhere looking to impress

A Somali man is born to conquer and plant his seed in as many young beautiful halimos why limit yourselves as a man? why let a woman prevent you from having fun? allah allowed you to have 4 its your right does a lionesss telll a male lion he cant do anything? be a man!

This thread is talking about cheating not marrying second or thirds or fourths which is not cheating its allowed but sadly guys cheat because they dont want to marry again because they scared of their wives reaction they rather do zina subhanallah

Some women would rather their man mess around then marry anther woman

All joke aside, but its really not hard not to cheat. And kids are not trees you can plant anywhere. That mentality is why so many somali dads have no relationship with their kids and kids are lost. stop thinking like an animal

 

[Sophisticate]

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I mean if they want multiple wives, it's their right Islamically speaking but it comes with certain stipulations.

I don't think they realized the logistics involved in dealing with multiple women. One marriage is enough buuq and headache enough, imagine multiplying that by 2 or 3. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy wallahi, it's one way-ticket to an early grave

If a wife is fine with a polygamous arrangement than her concept of marriage is totally transactional. At that point she's only with you for the kids. Or she's financially dependent and doesn't want to risk losing comfort or her livelihood. Its a husk of a marriage. Where the love if there was any to begin with is gone.

 

[Nak-Muay-Kru]

If a wife is fine with a polygamous arrangement than her concept of marriage is totally transactional. At that point she's only with you for the kids. Or she's financially dependent and doesn't want to risk losing comfort or her livelihood. Its a husk of a marriage. Where the love if there was any to begin with is gone.

That, or you're such a giga-Chad that she thinks you're the best option available. Either it ways it's big fat ew. I'm suspicious of any girl who doesn't display a healthy level of jealousy/possessiveness.

 

[Amirah]

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I mean if they want multiple wives, it's their right Islamically speaking but it comes with certain stipulations.

I don't think they realized the logistics involved in dealing with multiple women. One marriage is enough buuq and headache enough, imagine multiplying that by 2 or 3. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enough

In my honest opinion only a very wealthy man that can afford the exact multiples of everything(same houses, cars, jewelry, vacations, etc) for all the wives and is impartial should be the only one that marries multiple women. The rest have no business doing so. Even in the Quran that’s specified. Marrying multiple women only to treat them unfairly or playing favoritism it’s similar to having 4 children and treating and favoring some excessively over others.

What most Somali guys do now is they have one wife in diaspora and another in Somalia. He lives with one for 9 months outta the year and the other only 3 months, is that fair? Or some they have wife’s here, they go to Somalia and remarry never come back without ever divorcing his first wife. And these women sit here waiting hoping that maybe he’ll remember her one day and come back.

Usually these women have been married for 30-40 yrs and in their 50s+. She has no options, so he basically used her when she was younger and as soon as retirement approached and finally the kids are older(which should’ve been the best years of their lives together)he dips without divorcing her. The years she sacrificed for him, raising his kids, the hurdles like the war they overcame, and all of her patients are rewarded with big FU! What would you call a man like that?

 

[Angelina]

This guy has to be the biggest troll on this forum.

No way, he is trying to justify commiting adultery.

You can come with 101 excuses, even sighting that your wife was against you being in polygamous marriage, but no one cares. You'll still be eligible for hadd punishment and you will still be in Jahannum if you don't sincerely repent.

The whole normalising Zina is Western mentality at its worst, very common with Faraaxs on sspot.

 

[Juke]

We aren't supposed to be monogamous akhi

 

[Angelina]

We aren't supposed to be monogamous akhi

Yes you are.

The majority of you lot are low income, which has been the case for the majority of human history in which only minority of men were truly polygamous.

Whats normal is your reality, so stop with the fantasy.

 

[Basra]

Yes you are.

The majority of you lot are low income, which has been the case for the majority of human history in which only minority of men were truly polygamous.

Whats normal is your reality, so stop with the fantasy.

How is london abaay

 

[Eedaaf]

In my honest opinion only a very wealthy man that can afford multiples of exact everything(same houses, cars, jewelry, vacations, etc) for all the wives and man who is impartial should be the only one that marries multiple women. The rest have no business doing so. Even in the Quran that’s specified. Marrying multiple women only to treat them unfairly or playing favoritism it’s similar to having 4 children and treating and favoring some excessively over others.

What most Somali guys do now is they have one wife in diaspora and another in Somalia. He lives with one for 9 months outta the year and the other only 3 months, is that fair? Or some they have wife’s here, then they go to Somalia and remarry never come back without ever divorcing his first wife. And these women sit here waiting hoping that maybe he’ll remember her one day and come back.

Usually these women have been married for 30-40 yrs and in their 50s+. She has no options, so he basically used her when she was younger and as soon as retirement approached and finally the kids are older(which should’ve been the best years of their lives together)he dips her without divorcing her. The 30 - 40yrs she sacrificed for him and raised the kids, the war years, the refugees years, diaspora...all of that patients is rewarded with big FU! What would you call a man like that?

My adeer has 3wives and the third one is recently my dad always is like another wife

he lives in Somalia but this guy makes money

he has 10 kids too

 

[Basra]

My adeer has 3wives and the third one is recently my dad always is like another wife

he lives in Somalia but this guy makes money

he has 10 kids too

How about your dad?

 

[Amirah]

It’s totally different it’s halal for a man to kiss anther woman as long as it’s his wife (second wife) but it’s not halal for woman to kiss anther man simple as that

We’re not taking halal or not. They’re alot of legal things that you can do but you shouldn’t. I’m talking about the simple intrinsic feelings that’s involved here! Just because Islam said you can marry multiples doesn’t mean your wife no longer has feelings or a heart! Also you should be upfront about your intentions since it’s halal why hide it? Why manipulate her and then surprise her a decade down the road. There are woman who are happy to be in polygamy, go marry those but don’t trick a miskeen girl! That’s haram! That’s a sham marriage and that what most Somali men engage in.

 

[Juke]

Yes you are.

The majority of you lot are low income, which has been the case for the majority of human history in which only minority of men were truly polygamous.

Whats normal is your reality, so stop with the fantasy.

Cope Angie

 

[Basra]

We’re not taking halal or not. They’re alot of legal things that you can do but you shouldn’t. I’m talking about the simple intrinsic feelings that’s involved here! Just because Islam said you can marry multiples doesn’t mean your wife no longer has feelings or a heart! Also you should be upfront about your intentions since it’s halal why hide it? Why manipulate her and then surprise her a decade down the road. There are woman who are happy to be in polygamy, go marry those but don’t trick a miskeen girl! That’s haram! That’s a sham marriage and that what most Somali men engage in.

 

[Nak-Muay-Kru]

In my honest opinion only a very wealthy man that can afford the exact multiples of everything(same houses, cars, jewelry, vacations, etc) for all the wives and is impartial should be the only one that marries multiple women. The rest have no business doing so. Even in the Quran that’s specified. Marrying multiple women only to treat them unfairly or playing favoritism it’s similar to having 4 children and treating and favoring some excessively over others.

What most Somali guys do now is they have one wife in diaspora and another in Somalia. He lives with one for 9 months outta the year and the other only 3 months, is that fair? Or some they have wife’s here, they go to Somalia and remarry never come back without ever divorcing his first wife. And these women sit here waiting hoping that maybe he’ll remember her one day and come back.

Usually these women have been married for 30-40 yrs and in their 50s+. She has no options, so he basically used her when she was younger and as soon as retirement approached and finally the kids are older(which should’ve been the best years of their lives together)he dips without divorcing her. The years she sacrificed for him, raising his kids, the hurdles like the war they overcame, and all of her patients are rewarded with big FU! What would you call a man like that?

The whole "you have to wealthy to have four wives" is a minefield in of itself. That'll basically lead to a select few men at the top having harems whilst the avg Joe is left with f*ck all. Having an excess of sexually frustrated and angry young men tends to have catastrophic consequence. Monogamy is the glue that holds a society together wallahi. There's a reason it's the default.

 

[Amirah]

All joke aside, but its really not hard not to cheat. And kids are not trees you can plant anywhere. That mentality is why so many somali dads have no relationship with their kids and kids are lost. stop thinking like an animal

This! ! It always makes me happy when I see the very few Somali guys who hava caqli here!

It’s very simple whatever we’ve been doing, our forefathers have been doing, our grandfathers have been doing has not worked. Having kids from many different women especially when not wealthy and dipping out of their families has resulted in many negative consequences for the generations after. Why continue the trend? Doesn’t make sense. Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

 

[Nak-Muay-Kru]

Cope Angie

She's actually not even wrong wallahi, we have twice as many female ancestors than male ancestors. The only time your avg ancient farax got any was probably in some Ethiopian brothel

 

[Xaruun]

She's actually not even wrong wallahi, we have twice as many female ancestors than male ancestors. The only time your avg ancient farax got any was probably in some Ethiopian brothel

Incels have been common throughout history.