Hooyo explains how modern women are too materalistic

Happy_

Laa ta aamin nin wa law kaana ninkaaga- bom!
Sorry hooyo but…
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Aren’t y’all the ones that want us to be content with having sister wives? Waraa what do you think of women? You know we have more emotions than you? We feel more but you expect us to feel so little?

If a nigga can’t afford at least 900k house then he can f off. I need at least 10 pieces of 24k carat gold and car if you approach me. I won’t take a facebook watching peasent
Just don't end up with a broke ass invert
 
I saw the sadness in her eyes when she said 1 gambo, 1 guntino, 1 dacas :mybusiness:
Thats all you needed back in the days.. Man all faraxs should come together and invent a time machine.. We only use the machine to travel back in the time and get 4 wives, forget everything else :kodaksmiley::trumpsmirk:
 
Facts!

Somalis are among the least materialistic people on earth!
You will see families allowing their daughter to marry a broke man who also has the nerve to marry multiple women and commit his many children to a life of abject poverty.

Somalis are not as money motivated and driven as others, they don't care for family or financial planning as much as other Muslim communities. Everything they excuse as 'Allah provides', but Allah didn't tell us to make dumb decisions and not plan for life.
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Compared to other races, Somalis are the least materialistic. One thing I rate about Asian and Arab fathers is that they care about the financial prospects of a groom. Most of these men know they cannot knock on a fathers door without having their shit together.

In our community, you'll find a Farax in a dead end job, trying to find ends meet, trying to marry another with such confidence and arrogance. Look at our community in the West? We live in bad neighborhoods ect.

One thing i've noticed with some older gen Somali women is they give xaasid advice to girls that aren't their daughters. It is as if they want the younger generations to repeat the cycle and fall into the issues they fell into.
Is that way the older women push the younger generation to have as many kids as possible without taking economy and their ability of rising them.
 

TekNiKo

“I am an empathic and emotionally-aware person.
VIP
The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said to us: “O young men, whoever among you can afford it, let him get married, for it is more effective in lowering the gaze and guarding one’s chastity. And whoever cannot afford it should fast, for it will be a shield for him


This is an authentic hadith. Lets not deny hadiths please. As a man you need to be able to provide the basics of marriage. That is one of the biggest rights a Muslim wife has.

Also, it is categorically haram for you to marry more than one if you cannot afford to do.

Islam is a religion of moderation. You can be poor, but may be able to provide food and a roof over a woman's head with a job, even if its low paying then of course you should try to marry, however in such a situation
Prophet SAW families didnt have a cooked meal for days and his wives never complained. He slept on leaves and did not live a costly lifestyle. According to your definition of “affordability” he himself wouldnt make it. I think you women need to humble yourselves and stop calling men broke who fell in love with multiple women. It is calaf waxwalba.
 
The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said to us: “O young men, whoever among you can afford it, let him get married, for it is more effective in lowering the gaze and guarding one’s chastity. And whoever cannot afford it should fast, for it will be a shield for him


This is an authentic hadith. Lets not deny hadiths please. As a man you need to be able to provide the basics of marriage. That is one of the biggest rights a Muslim wife has.

Also, it is categorically haram for you to marry more than one if you cannot afford to do.

Islam is a religion of moderation. You can be poor, but may be able to provide food and a roof over a woman's head with a job, even if its low paying then of course you should try to marry, however in such a situation you cannot marry more than one.
In your understanding what is affordability?
 
Prophet SAW families didnt have a cooked meal for days and his wives never complained. He slept on leaves and did not live a costly lifestyle. According to your definition of “affordability” he himself wouldnt make it. I think you women need to humble yourselves and stop calling men broke who fell in love with multiple women. It is calaf waxwalba.
No offense to the deen or the prophets way of life, but in this modern age, I wouldn't recommend any one to father kids or wed wives they can't feed or clothe...its not not fair...kids deserve a decent life and the love attention required for a normal upbringing.
 

TekNiKo

“I am an empathic and emotionally-aware person.
VIP
No offense to the deen or the prophets way of life, but in this modern age, I wouldn't recommend any one to father kids or wed wives they can't feed or clothe...its not not fair...kids deserve a decent life and the love attention required for a normal upbringing.
I know man the Prophet SAW is an exceptional example… no one can reach his humility. Of course every child needs clothes and a good life. But where do we draw the line?
 
Ah shit, here we go again. The gender wars have erupted on Sspot once again. Guys, you're wasting your time with the women of today.

They take women like Cardi B & Nicki Minaj as their role models, you can't expect much :russ:
 
Ah shit, here we go again. The gender wars have erupted on Sspot once again. Guys, you're wasting your time with the women of today.

They take women like Cardi B & Nicki Minaj as their role models, you can't expect much :russ:
All the sisters that posted are pretty conservative and usually post pretty religious view points.

Show me one ghetto opinion? Shall I tell you what is ghetto? Not caring about your wife/wives and offspring and marrying multiple times without having the time and resources.


Anyways Cardi B and Nicki all ascribe to the mentality you would love women to have. They both 'ride or die' for trash men and put them on a pedestal.

That is facts.
 
Facts!

Somalis are among the least materialistic people on earth!
You will see families allowing their daughter to marry a broke man who also has the nerve to marry multiple women and commit his many children to a life of abject poverty.

Somalis are not as money motivated and driven as others, they don't care for family or financial planning as much as other Muslim communities. Everything they excuse as 'Allah provides', but Allah didn't tell us to make dumb decisions and not plan for life.
I understand and appreciate your reasoning but life isn't as clear cut as you're making it out to be. You make it sound as if all you need for a secure life is to make intelligent decisions but that's not guaranteed to work forever.

Who told you that intelligent decisions will guarantee that poverty or hardship doesn't suddenly overtake you? Sometimes the most cunning people have overnight lost all their wealth in dire situations. If a man loses most of his wealth does that give his wife the excuse to abandon him completely and take his children from him?

The measure of a good partner is the fortitude to stick by their spouse in dark times as well as the bright times. It says a lot about someone's supposed affection when they're quick to abandon you when they don't see the benefit of your company to themselves.
 
I understand and appreciate your reasoning but life isn't as clear cut as you're making it out to be. You make it sound as if all you need for a secure life is to make intelligent decisions but that's not guaranteed to work forever.

Who told you that intelligent decisions will guarantee that poverty or hardship doesn't suddenly overtake you? Sometimes the most cunning people have overnight lost all their wealth in dire situations. If a man loses most of his wealth does that give his wife the excuse to abandon him completely and take his children from him?

The measure of a good partner is the fortitude to stick by their spouse in dark times as well as the bright times. It says a lot about someone's supposed affection when they're quick to abandon you when they don't see the benefit of your company to themselves.


I never said a wife should abandon her husband if he loses his wealth, nor did I say that making smart decisions means you will not be tested.

Let me be clear, my issue is not with poverty, as that can be caused by many factors that are out of your hands.

My issue is with lazy, selfish men who don't restrain themselves, don't calculate their assets and instead wish to force multiple women and multiple children to be impoverished along with him.

For example, countries like Egypt and Iran set up laws so that men have to prove they can financially provide before taking on a second spouse, this concept is alien to Somalis.
 
No offense to the deen or the prophets way of life, but in this modern age, I wouldn't recommend any one to father kids or wed wives they can't feed or clothe...its not not fair...kids deserve a decent life and the love attention required for a normal upbringing.

Exactly.

How can a father say that he truly loves his children, but he chooses his desires over their well-being?
How can someone look at their babies and decide "who cares, they'll live" and then split their meager income between multiple homes. If this isn't a sign of low IQ, I don't know what is.
 
All the sisters that posted are pretty conservative and usually post pretty religious view points.

Show me one ghetto opinion? Shall I tell you what is ghetto? Not caring about your wife/wives and offspring and marrying multiple times without having the time and resources.


Anyways Cardi B and Nicki all ascribe to the mentality you would love women to have. They both 'ride or die' for trash men and put them on a pedestal.

That is facts.

He cannot disprove our comments, so he chooses to insult us. All we have repeated is that men should be responsible and lead with wisdow instead of being led by their selfish desires.

But this is problematic and triggering for some.


Ghetto men almost always have multiple women that they impregnated and multiple children they are neglecting. Ghetto lifestyles remind me of another society. :mybusiness:
 
I never said a wife should abandon her husband if he loses his wealth, nor did I say that making smart decisions means you will not be tested.

Let me be clear, my issue is not with poverty, as that can be caused by many factors that are out of your hands.

My issue is with lazy, selfish men who don't restrain themselves, don't calculate their assets and instead wish to force multiple women and multiple children to be impoverished along with him.

For example, countries like Egypt and Iran set up laws so that men have to prove they can financially provide before taking on a second spouse, this concept is alien to Somalis.
Do you really believe that these "lazy, selfish men" wish to live in continuous poverty and actually force women and their children to live in that poverty with them? That's an extremely far-fetched idea sxb

Poverty is by and large not a conscious choice by individuals their forced to it by economic and societal restraints.

It is not a good thing for society that many men are left behind in the marriage market like in China and other developing countries because this can potentially cause issues like increased crime and other anti-social behaviour.

I wouldn't take countries like Egypt and Iran as serious models for social policies because they have their own unique issues that don't really translate to the problems in Somalia. Btw I'm not arguing for polygamy or advising people to enter it if they're not financially capable, that's just ridiculous.

What I am arguing for is not barring men who have little means from pursuing marriage because that's a cruel and ultimately anti-Islamic view.
 
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Exactly.

How can a father say that he truly loves his children, but he chooses his desires over their well-being?
How can someone look at their babies and decide "who cares, they'll live" and then split their meager income between multiple homes. If this isn't a sign of low IQ, I don't know what is.

We can complain about it till kingdom come, but we women need to start raising our sons better. We need to teach them the true meaning of being a qawwâm. Allah tells us that the man is the head of the household, the Shepard of the flock, yet men are raised to hardly have any responsibility. How are women meant to trust and obey her husband when some cannot even trust their husbands to fulfill his role adequately?

In our culture, a woman is meant to display wifely qualities before marriage. She needs to know how to cook and clean. Help her hooyo with the siblings as tomorrow, she will have her own household to manage. In what ways are our men meant to prove themselves before marriage?
 
Do you really believe that these "lazy, selfish men" wish to live in continuous poverty and actually force women and their children to live in that poverty with them? That's an extremely far-fetched idea sxb

Poverty is by and large not a conscience choice by individuals their forced to it by economic and societal restraints.

It is not a good thing for society that many men are left behind in the marriage market like in China and other developing countries because this can potentially cause issues like increased crime and other anti-social behaviour.

I wouldn't take countries like Egypt and Iran as serious models for social policies because they have their own unique issues that don't really translate to the problems in Somalia. Btw I'm not arguing for polygamy or advising people to enter it if they're not financially capable, that's just ridiculous.

What I am arguing for is not barring men who have little means from pursuing marriage because that's a cruel and ultimately anti-Islamic view.

Nobody barred poor men from marrying, our problem is when poor men wish to marry multiple women even though they cannot afford to take care of them.

Yes, when a poor man decides to marry more than one woman, he is literally forcing more than one woman to live in poverty. That's exactly what he is doing.

If a poor man sticks to one household, he has less bills to pay, less mouths to feed and thus less financial difficulties.
 

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