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Deadbeat culture
- Thread starter πππππππ πππππ
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Humans are all "xayawaan" like. Our nomadic culture was no different to that of any other nomads, for instance Mongolians.
In the same instance these cultures also have extremely rich linguistic oral traditions, and deep rooted spirituality.
Agricultural cultures also had and have their own "xayawaan" like traits. Hell even modern so called advanced western culture has deeply animalistic sex and instinct based hierarchical structures.
This is a human condition my friend.
Somali father's are not deadbeat wow. We do all the work and make the money
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You are not very bright, but it's not your fault.
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Somali culture trains women to be 'tough' and to bear any weight. This level of stress and burden causes autoimmune diseases.
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While the men go out and dress themselves in new suits they bought just for the purpose of gossiping in a cafe. Very shameful
Idilinaa
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My dad has been for the most part heavily involved my families life, he also gives away a lot to relatives & family members and throughout my life i have been helped through schooling and landing my first part time job and internship even through Somali uncles in professional positions. Most Somali kids i grew up around had their fathers around or a male family member like an uncle or older cousin. Thats why it's been hard to wrap my head around this conception of a deadbeat yall talk about and it feels more like just disparaging antics aimed at those who are struggling in life or fail to adjust in a good way. It's not a crime or a cultural character trait to have problems. For Somalis most problems will solve itself if we fix employment barriers or economic problems that came from our displacement, that's what i think.
Even in Somali culture the idea of letting single mothers fend for themselves isn't even a thing, when you have something even called Dumaal which is where a male relative would even assume the role of a provider and protector in the husband's place. Orphans were protected and cared for under Somali traditional law. In advent of divorce/seperation the wife has option of just returning to her father and her clan for support.
Also divorce is much more common in Arab societies than Somali society. They have like 65%-70% divorce rates and in cultures like South asians etc where divorce rates are low it usually corresponds with less freedom for females and abuse and control. The idea of divorce/separation is to allow people to seperate amicably without causing eachother long term harm.
Even here Somali single mothers have an easier time of getting re-married in Somali culture than Arab and South Asian culture which often stigmatizes it and prevents them.
But also our culture allow for agency and economic independence. Somali women historically had more economic independence and greater inclusion, they could own/inherit property and land , participate in trade and commerce and manage their wealth independently. They even had the freedom to choose their own suitors, which was a rare privilege in many other regions of the Arab and South Asian world. This allowed them to be economically self-sufficient, a stark contrast to many other regions where women were often denied ownership rights.
So if they comment on Somali womens ability to be self-sufficient and be on their own, then they just expose their backward misogynistic mindset to restrict women, make them overly dependant and keep them caged at home. It's more of an expression of extreme control and manipulation their socities operate under, not Somali deadbeat culture lool.
The more i research and learn about other Muslim communities in contrast to the Somali community, the more i find out that Somalis stick together more and help support eachother and are more self-reliant.
Most other communities like Middle Eastern and South Asian communities will either hide their problems and let the next man over struggle and fend for themselves largely indifferent to someone who isn't from the same family background as them or they will control and abuse eachother inside the family, thats why honour killing is even a thing in their cultures they are so obsessed with control and reputation management over women, they will even delete the person to maintain it. I don't envy them at all.
Even in Somali culture the idea of letting single mothers fend for themselves isn't even a thing, when you have something even called Dumaal which is where a male relative would even assume the role of a provider and protector in the husband's place. Orphans were protected and cared for under Somali traditional law. In advent of divorce/seperation the wife has option of just returning to her father and her clan for support.
Also divorce is much more common in Arab societies than Somali society. They have like 65%-70% divorce rates and in cultures like South asians etc where divorce rates are low it usually corresponds with less freedom for females and abuse and control. The idea of divorce/separation is to allow people to seperate amicably without causing eachother long term harm.
Even here Somali single mothers have an easier time of getting re-married in Somali culture than Arab and South Asian culture which often stigmatizes it and prevents them.
But also our culture allow for agency and economic independence. Somali women historically had more economic independence and greater inclusion, they could own/inherit property and land , participate in trade and commerce and manage their wealth independently. They even had the freedom to choose their own suitors, which was a rare privilege in many other regions of the Arab and South Asian world. This allowed them to be economically self-sufficient, a stark contrast to many other regions where women were often denied ownership rights.
So if they comment on Somali womens ability to be self-sufficient and be on their own, then they just expose their backward misogynistic mindset to restrict women, make them overly dependant and keep them caged at home. It's more of an expression of extreme control and manipulation their socities operate under, not Somali deadbeat culture lool.
The more i research and learn about other Muslim communities in contrast to the Somali community, the more i find out that Somalis stick together more and help support eachother and are more self-reliant.
Most other communities like Middle Eastern and South Asian communities will either hide their problems and let the next man over struggle and fend for themselves largely indifferent to someone who isn't from the same family background as them or they will control and abuse eachother inside the family, thats why honour killing is even a thing in their cultures they are so obsessed with control and reputation management over women, they will even delete the person to maintain it. I don't envy them at all.
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All the married men I know that are late 20s and older are involved current or former husbands and fathers.
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