Success or pure love?

[notinuse.]

I'm kind of in a mental dilemma with myself, I have always put my goals and achievement as my #1 priority. I grew up incredibly blessed with a lot of opportunities and loved ones all around me, people who loved me unconditionally and supported me throughout my life. I noticed the more I grew up how I never really appreciated that love, I always but it aside and focused on succeeding and achieving my goals but suddenly the past year or two I kept getting vogue memories of those times I spent with the people who I loved and who loved me.

It's so odd, the moment I turned in to a legal adult my mentality slowly switched. At first I wanted to succeed at everything I dreamed on my own (which I have done for most part) but now I just want to be surrounded by people who I genuinely love and life live in simplicity?

Idk how to explain it, maybe its me being 20 but I feel like a completely different person, as if am debating with myself on what I should prioritise of the two.

 

[hamar_oo_iidil]

I kept getting vogue memories of those times I spent with the people who I loved and who loved me.

That resonates with me a lot. I feel that feeling more and more often as I get older.

I feel like a completely different person, as if am debating with myself on what I should prioritise of the two.

Choose love and comfort over achievements, I say. You can never regret loving the people you love. Being in the pursuit of material successes and achievements without deeper meaning/purpose won't be fulfilling and you maybe left always wondering what if...

Whatever you choose to do, go easy on yourself walaal.

 

[CALMONE20###]

Walaal, love is a better bet for you,because the feeling of people loving you unconditionally and supporting you is the best feeling.

 

[notinuse.]

That resonates with me a lot. I feel that feeling more and more often as I get older.

Choose love and comfort over achievements, I say. You can never regret loving the people you love. Being in the pursuit of material successes and achievements without deeper meaning/purpose won't be fulfilling and you maybe left always wondering what if...

Whatever you choose to do, go easy on yourself walaal.

Thank you for my comment walaal, I have been having dreams about blissful moments of my childhood and memories I spend with friends which gave me sort of an epiphany if it's my subconscious telling me to enjoy life with my loved ones rather than constantly chasing new dreams.

 

[Somali Saayid]

My acomplishments will save this nation and thus the nations needs are above my own.

 

[notinuse.]

My acomplishments will save this nation and thus the nations needs are above my own.

Yeah I have been thinking about that too, is it selfless since you're putting others before yourself or is it selfish since you're doing it to be remembered as someone victorious and heroic thus feeding your own ego.

 

[Somali Saayid]

Yeah I have been thinking about that too, is it selfless since you're putting others before yourself or is it selfish since you're doing it to be remembered as someone victorious and heroic thus feeding your own ego.

I think for me it is a combination of both, I've always wanted to help Somalis back home and turn our country around but to be in the history books and stautes and schools named after me has made quite happy that I choose to help my people. Inshallah I will contribute greatly to the development of the nation as a whole and it's new Golden age.

 

[Internet Nomad]

when a person is on their deathbed they never say “ I wish I spent more time in the office”.

It is natural what your feeling. We are social creatures. When Allah made Adam in heaven the thing he yearned the most for was company.

 

[Sophisticate]

I don't think your love for people or a desire for connection has to be incompatible with wanting to succeed. I mean you can have both.
Where do people get this idea that you have to be cut throat or a workaholic (with no social life that is single-minded toward their ambition and totally identified with it) to be successful. No. People will define you by how you treat them and make them feel. Cultivate a winning personality and show that you're highly capable and reliable and not only will you be successful but you'll have positive relationships with business partners/coworkers, partners, friends and family. If you give people your undivided attention even with time constraints placed on you then you'll have more fruitful conversations and make people feel better after conversing with you. And if you can't do that respectfully relay that. Communication is key to success be it materially or relationally.​

 

[Somali Saayid]

when a person is on their deathbed they never say “ I wish I spent more time in the office”.

It is natural what your feeling. We are social creatures. When Allah made Adam in heaven the thing he yearned the most for was company.

Not me, more time in the office will mean more years of stable nation. From Fajr till 3 Hours after Isha. All day every day.

*somalia

 

[Barni]

I dont need ppl’s love to live so i picked high achievements.

​

 

[notinuse.]

I don't think your love for people or a desire for connection has to be incompatible with wanting to succeed. I mean you can have both.
Where do people get this idea that you have to be cut throat or a workaholic (with no social life that is single-minded toward their ambition and totally identified with it) to be successful. No. People will define you by how you treat them and make them feel. Cultivate a winning personality and show that you're highly capable and reliable and not only will you be successful but you'll have positive relationships with business partners/coworkers, partners, friends and family. If you give people your undivided attention even with time constraints placed on you then you'll have more fruitful conversations and make people feel better after conversing with you. And if you can't do that respectfully relay that. Communication is key to success be it materially or relationally.​

I don't think my thread was about communication or being workaholic but more so putting the feeling of successful above love, a lot of successful people have social lives.

 

[Thalassocracy]

My acomplishments will save this nation and thus the nations needs are above my own.

the story of Yousuf has the mad impassioned love vs duty to family brothers and father dichotomy

you see success is from a sober reality

 

[Sophisticate]

I don't think my thread was about communication or being workaholic but more so putting the feeling of successful above love, a lot of successful people have social lives.

I very much think it's inextricably linked. How you communicate will definitely impact whether someone feels cared for, heard and appreciated in your presence (be they close relationships, coworkers, schoolmates etc.) I think the more fruitful exchanges you have the better the quality of your life and relationships. I noticed it's not merely the amount of time you spend with someone that's important but the quality of that time. Well, I think that's worthy of mentioning.

Anyway, back to the main topic. I don't see the pursuit of success and love as an either or dilemma. You can balance love that is caring for family and friends with your drive for achievement.​

 

[Hmohamed54]

I think this is something you should talk abouwuth other somali girls. Idky but most somali girls are overachiever and for me I tend to stay away from people with those qualities.

 

[Barni]

I think this is something you should talk abouwuth other somali girls. Idky but most somali girls are overachiever and for me I tend to stay away from people with those qualities.

You don’t want a woman dat outshines u? Its says more about u than her tbh.

 

[Hmohamed54]

You don’t want a woman dat outshines u? Its says more about u than her tbh.

I said overachievers lol Not ambitious.

 

[Hmohamed54]

You don’t want a woman dat outshines u? Its says more about u than her tbh.

Plus everyone got they type. Most guys are happy with more traditional roles.

 

[Barni]

I said overachievers lol Not ambitious.

Ambitious ppl & overachievers fall within the same category. To be an overachiever u need ambition.

 

[Barni]

Plus everyone got they type. Most guys are happy with more traditional roles.

Fair enough.