WOMEN PREVENTS FATHER FROM SEEING KIDS FOR 11 YEARS

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“I haven’t seen my six children for 11 years, and it’s tearing me apart. I’m currently here on a short holiday to visit my mother as I live in London. I’ve tried everything from all the way to begging and pleading and willing to compromise on anything but she refuses and her family are taking her side without thinking about the children. Children should never be used as pawns or spiteful grudges to get back at an ex, and though she’s my ex, I will always be their daddy. There’s no such thing as ex-father. She remarried and moved on whilst I never remarried, and the only physical memories I’ve of them are their childhood pictures that I keep with me all the time, especially my youngest daughter. She loved me so much. Sometimes the pain is too much that I start crying. I’ve been paying child maintenance for God knows how long and never missed a single payment, but the only thing I haven’t done so far is going through the family court because I know it’s long-winded and I didn’t want to put my kids through hell. I’ve sent mediators, but she wouldn’t budge. If I knew what kind of grudge she holds against me, I’d try everything to fix it. Others have told me to be patient and that it will work out and they will reach out, but I’m running out of patience, and I don’t want to despair.”


http://www.somalifaces.org/post/155622040547/i-havent-seen-my-six-children-for-11-years-and
 

Mohamud

ʜᴀᴄᴋᴇᴅ ᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀ
Yikes

Not sure how one can get ropped into children support payments whilst not being allowed to even see the children
 

VixR

Veritas
tumblr_ojihe8gK4U1v22j6lo1_1280.jpg




“I haven’t seen my six children for 11 years, and it’s tearing me apart. I’m currently here on a short holiday to visit my mother as I live in London. I’ve tried everything from all the way to begging and pleading and willing to compromise on anything but she refuses and her family are taking her side without thinking about the children. Children should never be used as pawns or spiteful grudges to get back at an ex, and though she’s my ex, I will always be their daddy. There’s no such thing as ex-father. She remarried and moved on whilst I never remarried, and the only physical memories I’ve of them are their childhood pictures that I keep with me all the time, especially my youngest daughter. She loved me so much. Sometimes the pain is too much that I start crying. I’ve been paying child maintenance for God knows how long and never missed a single payment, but the only thing I haven’t done so far is going through the family court because I know it’s long-winded and I didn’t want to put my kids through hell. I’ve sent mediators, but she wouldn’t budge. If I knew what kind of grudge she holds against me, I’d try everything to fix it. Others have told me to be patient and that it will work out and they will reach out, but I’m running out of patience, and I don’t want to despair.”


http://www.somalifaces.org/post/155622040547/i-havent-seen-my-six-children-for-11-years-and

So 11 years isn't "long-winded"? He had to go through the courts, and schedule a hearing!
Yikes

Not sure how one can get ropped into children support payments whilst not being allowed to even see the children
Visitation and support are not the same bill, at least not here.
 

Thatsomaligirl

Loves milk is lactose intolerant, kill me
Yikes

Not sure how one can get ropped into children support payments whilst not being allowed to even see the children
Is she allowed to keep his children away from him like that while making him pay child support??? WTF

Is he like a child molester, abusive or something because other then that he should have the right to see them.
 
So 11 years isn't "long-winded"? He had to go through the courts, and schedule a hearing!

Visitation and support are not the same bill, at least not here.

"Others have told me to be patient and that it will work out and they will reach out, but I’m running out of patience, and I don’t want to despair.”"

He sounds depressed and his relatives/friends arn't giving him the right advice that he needs. The advice seeing take things to the family courts 11 years ago. Pretty sad though.
 
Is she allowed to keep his children away from him like that while making him pay child support??? WTF

Is he like a child molester, abusive or something because other then that he should have the right to see them.

I think he just hasn't gone to the family courts yet. and as Vix was saying child support payments and visitations right are two seperate things.
 

VixR

Veritas
"Others have told me to be patient and that it will work out and they will reach out, but I’m running out of patience, and I don’t want to despair.”"

He sounds depressed and his relatives/friends arn't giving him the right advice that he needs. The advice seeing take things to the family courts 11 years ago. Pretty sad though.
Trying to mediate with the ex spouse for 11 years just sounds absurd, and the fact that her family and his are both advocating for her interests above their son's makes this story sound suspicious. Maybe he had a change of heart and truly wants to see them at this point in time, or there's something that's not being shared here. It doesn't add up imo. Regardless, he skipped a procedural step and needs to go to court.
 

Mohamud

ʜᴀᴄᴋᴇᴅ ᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀ
So 11 years isn't "long-winded"? He had to go through the courts, and schedule a hearing!

Visitation and support are not the same bill, at least not here.

I assumed this was the UK.

But the question is still valid. Beside specific instances, I can't fathom of visitation can be completely cut off while payments still need to be made. Said person is not allowed an active role in the kid's life so "child support" is rendered useless. It's more or less pay me money for the kid I'm denying you the opportunity to bond and raise.

Lunacy tbh...
 

maestro

Cultural revolution
If this happened to me wlhi I would go insane. Just imagining it makes my head hurt.

I hope the man gets to see his kids. No man deserves being denied his children. Plus, the kids will just grow up hating their mother and family for denying them their father.

This is wrong and cruel
 
As a Father myself who's married, I view this man as a total scumb bag.

Who wait's 11 years? This means even if his oldest child was 6 years old
and the wife kept getting pregnant right after giving birth, it would mean the oldest child
would be 17 years old by now or 18.

This man suffers from the "Absent Aabbaha Syndrome"!! He wasn't present mentality during the marriage.

Leaving a women with 6 kids is an incredible moral shitshow. Another man had to step in and marry the women,
this is probably what stresses him out the most.

There are so many question I would love to slap this man with as a Father myself:

Why didn't you seek part-time custody?
What made you wait so long?
Do you currently live with roommates or do you live alone?
If you live alone, how can you father your children in a 1 bedroom apartment?
Are you upset another man is raising the children you neglected?

There's so many dead-beat and absent-minded fathers its ridiculous nowadays.
 

Gambar

VIP
The mother uses the father being away to make the kids hate the father. Most fathers give up and move on when that happens.
Even before it gets to that point, a lot of fathers think the mother will get custody so they don't bother filing.
 

Mohamud

ʜᴀᴄᴋᴇᴅ ᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀ
Ngl if a woman denies me visitation to my children we're going nuclear on some abduction shit. I'll change their names and wallahi we'll disappear into the night like Carmen Sandiego.

She'll never find us. :damedamn:
 
Even before it gets to that point, a lot of fathers think the mother will get custody so they don't bother filing.
No one tells them their rights. They think the kids will automatically go to the mother so they don't bother. The women push that narrative a lot.
 

VixR

Veritas
As a Father myself who's married, I view this man as a total scumb bag.

Who wait's 11 years? This means even if his oldest child was 6 years old
and the wife kept getting pregnant right after giving birth, it would mean the oldest child
would be 17 years old by now or 18.

This man suffers from the "Absent Aabbaha Syndrome"!! He wasn't present mentality during the marriage.

Leaving a women with 6 kids is an incredible moral shitshow. Another man had to step in and marry the women,
this is probably what stresses him out the most.

There are so many question I would love to slap this man with as a Father myself:

Why didn't you seek part-time custody?
What made you wait so long?
Do you currently live with roommates or do you live alone?
If you live alone, how can you father your children in a 1 bedroom apartment?
Are you upset another man is raising the children you neglected?

There's so many dead-beat and absent-minded fathers its ridiculous nowadays.
There's definitely something off about this story. Tons of absent fathers suddenly remember they had children only after they've grown.

If it's sincere, there must be something law related that prevents him from going to court with which she has clout to definitively prevent him from seeing them, and that's what made a decade+ long mediation process the only way through?
 

Gambar

VIP
No one tells them their rights. They think the kids will automatically go to the mother so they don't bother. The women push that narrative a lot.
Men used to take their kids with them after the divorce under Islamic rule. I think one has to be more diligent about their rights, you can't just give up.
 
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