Relationships are not black and white walaal. He's gonna have strengths in some areas that I don't and vice versa. We compliment each other inshallah..
Which of the following attributes in a woman do you rate the highest.
- Thread starter Kane
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Relationships are not black and white walaal. He's gonna have strengths in some areas that I don't and vice versa. We compliment each other inshallah..
You will see when you get in one
Relationships are not black and white walaal. He's gonna have strengths in some areas that I don't and vice versa. We compliment each other inshallah..
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38 | Hyderabad, India
I thought it was only me who thought all these people online sound more like they're adopting a pet rather than marrying a full person. For example people who want a stay at home wife don't think about what she'll do locked up in there. It's like a quarantine for the rest of your days.
If you have trust issues she's not the problem saaxib, you are.
Then again can't blame them for not being at my level of intellect HA HA HA HA HA
No, there are relationships in which a man does take his wifeβs needs into account with regards to decision making. It really isnβt one or the other. Life isnβt black or white.
I donβt think you understand how selfish people are. Those men do not care provided theyβre getting their needs met. Theyβve been raised in cultures in which the manβs wants and desires are at the forefront. Itβs learned behavior and women especially older ones encourage that sort of dynamic.
How will that work out tho? That is just anarchy. Someone has to have the final say
Relationships are not black and white walaal. He's gonna have strengths in some areas that I don't and vice versa. We compliment each other inshallah..
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38 | Hyderabad, India
They are not looking for wives but mothers.
Reminds me of Richard Waterson lol
The old established a system that fit their way of life, at that age they are old and stubborn always wanting to keep things just the way they are thus conservative.
As for the young are born with ambitions and ideas, new way of doing things thus progressive.
As the old fade away and the young grow old, thus cycle of creation and destruction of culture is what keeps it alive.
The way of life our grandparents or our parents lived does not fit our sense of somalinimo. This is why countries with majority youth and minority of the elder will result in chaos. The young have a solid base of identity.
All in all our culture of imprisoning women in households and illogical loyalty can be changed in our age and time.
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38 | Hyderabad, India
You failed to understand what I'm saying.
I'm talking about history in general not somalia. It's not a unique case actually pretty common after a state falls. Like after the Roman Empire fell, the old men of Rome gave way to the Youngblood Germanic tribesmen to rebuild the nation. It slowly progressed like somalia has been since the 90s until they became Modern Italy during the 1800s
I think alot of these problems could be solved if people didn't project their preconceived notions of what a man or woman is but instead saw their significant other as a fellow human being first, with his/her own unique desires and wants..
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38 | Hyderabad, India
That would take atleast 20 years to change. With insane effort that is
thats not being submissive thats being a leader every leader must do consultation before making a decision
I don't make probabilistic calculations when it comes to suitors and the mix of characteristics they could possess.
The three that you outlined in your poll are sort of vague but I suppose that was intentional. I'll try to make it brief.
Mindset: Growth-centric, as in interested in personal development, emotionally stable and committed to the notion of a life-long marriage, and able to deal with the mundanity of life while having the mortal fortitude to stay the course with actual examples in their life that demonstrate what a healthy marriage looks like.
Beauty: Physical attractiveness.
Accomplishments: He has a lofty enough life goal that motivates him and doesn't require your direction. He's self-motivated enough. Rather, what he is working toward is impressive enough to you that you accept it enough to support him. And he's shown a track record of previous wins, or at least left some tangible evidence of this. Accomplishments could refer to religious achievements, worldly pursuits (education, status, or monetary indicators), or accolades that are difficult to achieve. I would hope that this person is emotionally intelligent and self-aware enough to see themselves as more than their achievements and can truly level with people who have their own life constraints and an altogether different life mission. Not everyone has the means or tenacity to devote time to an endeavour. But they are likely an authority in something you are not.
I see all these factors as overlapping and inextricably linked. In order of importance, mindset would be the driver that would aid one in accomplishments, and some baseline level of attraction is required.
But I am tho you don't know anything about my circumstances your just jumping to random conclusions based off your own assumptions
This stuff is never an actual thing most guys tend to seek in women as a priority especially not in the context of somali guys if we take out @Angelina trying to inject other cultures into the discussion as well as stats that are irrelevant to us since in general somali women I would say are more educated in comparison to the men and we don't have that cultural push either.
We aren't talking about disparities in educational attainment among men vs. women as in the west there are generally more women in higher education than men albeit there is a gendered split when it comes to majors. We are already speaking of Somalis who are educated (men and women alike). There are plenty with degrees but the higher up you go in academia the fewer there are.
I digress, men don't intuitively think I'm going to shoot my shot because she has XYZ degrees or makes a certain amount. I have maintained its not a requirement but if he had the choice between two equally matched candidates level of education could be the needle mover. It's certainly a nice footnote that he may prospectively think might help his children. Since men are not a monolith some of them value accolades (provided it comes with a good mindset and pleasant appearance).
Also, there was a group of Somalis pre-Civil war that belonged to the educated class and we'd be lying to say they didn't want access to the minority of educated women there were available (if they could have them). They would want to marry these type especially if they were from the reer. Those ones had first pick. You guys are young so its best I inform you about the different subcultures in operation back in the day. Higher education wasn't a must have but it was vaunted.
I digress, men don't intuitively think I'm going to shoot my shot because she has XYZ degrees or makes a certain amount. I have maintained its not a requirement but if he had the choice between two equally matched candidates level of education could be the needle mover. It's certainly a nice footnote that he may prospectively think might help his children. Since men are not a monolith some of them value accolades (provided it comes with a good mindset and pleasant appearance).
Also, there was a group of Somalis pre-Civil war that belonged to the educated class and we'd be lying to say they didn't want access to the minority of educated women there were available (if they could have them). They would want to marry these type especially if they were from the reer. Those ones had first pick. You guys are young so its best I inform you about the different subcultures in operation back in the day. Higher education wasn't a must have but it was vaunted.
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